Twisted Fate
by HeatherT
Summary: Fate is twisted. It gives you everything you've ever wanted just to rip it away and dangle it in front of your face for the rest of your life. A rollercoaster of emotions, follow Bella and Edward along the narrow paths of pain and love. OOC, Lemons!
1. Prologue

**Author Note: Before you write this off as just another Edward and Bella sappy love story... please give it a chance. It will not be a typical Happily Ever After. I have worked hard on this story and really hope you all enjoy it. I plan to post once a week for this. I will be posting the first chapter right along with the epilogue. I want to say a quick thanks to my beta twilight-is-lovee, I almost gave up on this story but she convinced me it was worth it.**

**Playlist  
_Love Hurts_ by Bon Jovi

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**Prologue**

**BPOV**

Love hurts. That is the truest statement I have ever heard. When you truly love someone it creates a physical ache so strong that it's almost more painful than it is really worth.

I fell in love when I was seventeen and most people think this is a cliché but I truly found my soul-mate in Edward Cullen the summer before my senior year. There was a connection between us I just couldn't explain. Even the thought of saying goodbye to him at the end of the day caused my chest to ache and my breathing to become labored.

It never seemed to matter what we did, we could never get it right. It was like fate was playing with us. It dropped everything we could ever want right in front of our faces only to rip it away as soon as we got attached.

For years I pinned over Edward Cullen. I cried myself to sleep every night as the pain of being away from him ate away at me. Every time I thought I was over him, he came right back into the picture only to steal my heart again as he rode away on his proverbial white horse.

**EPOV**

Isabella Swan. It's a name that can be a statement all its own. I fell in love with her the moment my eyes landed on her. Every breath that leaves my lungs is for her and only her, but I stupidly let her slip through my fingers time and time again.

At seventeen years old I experienced an emotional rollercoaster that most people only dream of riding. I fell in love, lost that love by all fault of my own and then got her back only to let her leave me again.

I vowed to make Bella my wife. I was determined to make her mine regardless of how long it took to make that happen. She was my only true love, my soul-mate, and we were put on this earth to be together but I consistently fucked everything up.

Bon Jovi sure knew what they were talking about when they wrote _Love Hurts_. It's a pain that never dulls. I love Isabella Swan and I will do anything to make her mine.

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**Review if you like it! I love to hear your thoughts!**


	2. Crash Landing

**Author Note: Just a quick thank you for reading and another thank you to my beta twilight-is-lovee.**

**Playlist**_  
**Circus**_** by Britney Spears**  
**_Glamorous_ _Life_ by T Inaya**  
**_Pray For You_ by Jaron and The Long Road to Love**  
**_Bad Reputation _by Joan Jett**  
**_Dirty Little Secret_ by All-American Rejects**  
**_The Boys of Summer_ by The Ataris**  
**_Replay_ by IYAZ**

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**BPOV**

Grumbling as Alice and I walked through the double doors at the end of the long corridor signaling the culmination of my junior year of high school, I found myself wishing that the day had never ended. My newlywed mother had decided she wanted an extended honeymoon over the summer, so I was being subjected to two months worth of Forks, WA for 'quality father-daughter time,' as my mother so lovingly put it.

"Bella, quit being such a drama queen. I mean, seriously. It's just for the summer. It's not like you're being exiled. You're old enough to appreciate the fact that your mother deserves to be happy and this is what she wants. You did agree to it." Alice rolled her eyes at me as we both climbed into her yellow Porsche. I hated the flamboyant vehicle that her father had so eagerly thrown at her when his scandalous affairs swept the media.

"I only agreed because I hate seeing her crushed, and I knew she would have been if I had been the one to deny her the opportunity to travel around Europe for two months. I just don't understand why I couldn't stay at your place while she was away. I _hate_ Forks! It is so damn boring and wet. That's the entire reason I made the arrangement with Charlie for our two weeks to be spent in California every summer," I whined like a petulant child as Alice sped through the city streets to my house for our one last hoorah before I was shipped out the following morning.

"Alright, I won't hear another word about any of this crap. I need you to be happy-Bella tonight because if I'm losing my best friend for two months, I want to have one hell of a goodbye party." Alice beamed at me, and I couldn't help but smile back at her. I knew I had to let her have her fun tonight because no matter how much I despised being her living Barbie doll, I would miss her come tomorrow night.

"You know what? You're right. We need to just be us tonight. So when we get back to my house, we're going to mix up a batch of virgin margaritas and put in a cheesy chick flick while I uselessly fight against your attempts at giving me a make-over." I felt tears sting my eyes, but I sucked in a deep breath to fight them off.

"You know exactly what it takes to get to my heart!" Alice's sarcastic southern accent made me smile, and I felt relief as we pulled into the driveway of the only place I had ever considered home.

I loved everything about Phoenix. The sun hated me because of my fair skin and resistance to tanning, but I loved the heat upon my skin and the dry air. I loved the warm browns that surrounded me and the wide-open space that spread around endlessly. I most certainly loved the fact that the place was so large I could easily get lost in the crowds. It was the exact opposite of Forks, WA.

I loved my father, but I hated where he lived. The town was so tiny that you couldn't go to the grocery store without the entire population being aware of exactly how long you were there and what exactly you purchased. It was always so cold and wet. The only color that could be seen was a deep, heavy green that made you feel like you were trapped. I hated the enclosed feeling all of those trees caused within me.

Alice and I spent our evening exactly as planned. I felt horrible for leaving her alone for the summer. Neither one of us were great at making friends, and we really only had each other to truly count on. The only thing that kept me from feeling guilty enough to tell my mother that I refused to let her have for two months was Alice's older brother Emmett. Emmett was the closest thing to a big brother I had ever had. He treated Alice and me like we were the most important people in the world.

When Alice and Emmett's father, a state senator, was ousted for his slimy affairs all over the country, their mother was humiliated and sunk into a deep depression. Matthew Brandon tried his best to buy the forgiveness of his family, but no amount of money could ever repair the rift he had caused to grow between Eileen Brandon and her two children. I knew that Alice loved both of her parents, but the pain her father had sent spiraling through her broke her trust in all men aside from Emmett. I hated watching her shy away from relationships of any kind aside from her older brother and myself.

Early the next morning, I was awoken by the tornado that I like to call Renee. She was whirling around my bedroom at 5AM, rattling on about how our flights were leaving at 11 and we needed to be on time. So I was forced to make my final run through of my bags and bedroom while trying to say a tearful goodbye to Alice. I knew I would be back in 8 weeks, but it didn't help the fact that I missed her the second her car pulled out of the driveway.

"Mom! Can you please let me breathe? You rushed me already and its only 6AM! Just back off!" I cried out in frustration while Renee flitted around me, throwing random things into my carry on.

"I'm sorry, Bella. I don't mean to rush you. I'm just so excited about this trip, and I want you to be as comfortable at your father's house as you can possibly manage. You know that I'm going to miss you desperately, don't you?" Renee squeaked out as she stared at her feet. I let out an exasperated sigh and slumped down onto the couch.

"I know that. I just… I'm not looking forward to spending my summer in a strange place where I don't know anybody, and Charlie will be at work all the time. What am I supposed to do for 8 weeks?" I whined as my head fell into my hands. I felt my mother's hand run along my back as she let out a heavy sigh.

"Listen, honey, I know this isn't how you planned to spend your summer, but I really appreciate you giving me the opportunity to spend this time with Phil. I know that you're sacrificing a lot for me. I just have this feeling about you going to your Dad's this summer. You'll figure it out, sweetie." Renee patted me gently on the back before rising from her seat next to me and going right back into her panic packing mode.

The rest of the day was long and quite uneventful. I entered the airport and security with my mother and Phil, but our gates were at opposite ends so we parted early. I was thankful for the early separation and the time alone to process everything.

The plane to Seattle wasn't overly crowded, so I managed to have an entire row to myself. I managed to catch up on a little bit of sleep, but planes aren't really conducive to sleep. After the boring flight to Seattle, I had to get into a terrifyingly small bucket of metal that they told me was a plane and fly into Port Angeles. From there, Charlie picked me up, and we drove back to Forks.

"Bells! Hey, sweetie, you're looking just a beautiful as ever." Charlie smiled at me as I climbed down the rickety stairs, exiting the plane. I gave him a forced smile as my feet hit the ground and prayed that I would never have to step foot into another contraption like the one I had just left.

"Hi, Dad," I replied while he took my bags and led me out to the parking lot. I looked around for the police cruiser, but it wasn't anywhere in sight. "Where did you park?" I questioned him as we paused in front of a massive, classic truck.

"This is us," he stated simply as he threw my bags into the bed of the truck.

"Oh, when did you get this?" I was thanking whatever God that was on my side that I wouldn't have to spend my summer riding around in a police car.

"I actually got it when you informed me you'd be spending the summer here. I figured you would need a way of getting around once I go back to work, and it's not like I spent a fortune on it. Besides, I could use something besides my cruiser." Charlie's face was filled with pride and hope that his gesture was accepted from me.

"Wow, you did this for me? Thanks, Dad, I really appreciate that." I grinned back at him as I took in the truck. It was a fifties style that was a rust orange color, but it had character as well as potential.

"I'm glad you like it kiddo." He patted my back and opened my door for me before climbing in the cab himself.

Most of the drive was spent in silence. Charlie asked me a little bit about school and Alice. I had brought her on one trip with me, and Charlie had fallen in love with her. He wanted me to bring her out for the summer, but she didn't want to leave her mother or Emmett so soon after her father's transgressions.

When we arrived at the small house in the center of Forks, Charlie left me alone to unpack. He apologized for the lack of redecorating and informed me that he would be taking me out to correct that issue. I groaned at the prospect of shopping at all, let alone with Charlie, but I wasn't in the mood to argue with him about it.

Once I opened the door to my old room, I rethought trying to bail on shopping. Everything was exactly the way I left it when I was nine. The walls were still the pale yellow that my mom painted them before I was born, the old white rocking chair still sat in the same corner with the old quilt my Grandmother made me, my bed was an old rickety metal twin frame with an ancient mattress lying atop it, and the pink desk that sat across from it with its matching bed side table and dresser were still standing proudly. I sighed as I dropped my bags on the floor and turned back around to meet Charlie in the kitchen for our shopping excursion.

"Bells, they called me into the station for a little while. I'm just gonna give you my credit card to get whatever you need. Take the truck out. There's a GPS in there for you so you can find a store. Um… you'll probably need to go back out to Port Angeles to get some things, but if you want to wait, I'll take you tomorrow," Charlie called out from the kitchen.

"That's fine Dad, I need to learn my way around anyway. I'll just head out when you leave." I smiled at him and the prospect of going out to shop on my own.

I drove around Forks and found most of what I needed. Clothing was my only limited option for purchase, and I decided that it could wait. I had looked into the kitchen before taking off and took it upon myself to do some shopping for dinner. I didn't want to eat at the greasy diner every night, so I was taking on the task of cooking.

I walked aimlessly through the store, looking for the items on my list. I didn't know where anything was, so I was wandering, and my clumsy self didn't see anyone standing in the aisle in front of me, so I was shocked when I slammed into someone, sending both our baskets flying and landing me on the floor.

"Jesus fucking Christ, watch where you're fucking going!" a male voice called out in frustration. My hair was covering my face so I couldn't really see him, and I was certainly glad that he couldn't see the red staining my face and neck.

"I am so sorry," I mumbled out as I crawled up to my knees and began picking the items up from the floor that had fallen out of our baskets. I was frantically grabbing at things and putting them into the two baskets while forcing my tears not to come when I felt a shock on my hand as a shadow covered me.

"Hey, I'm sorry I yelled at you like that. I really wasn't trying to be an ass. I was just shocked is all." His voice was velvety smooth, and it sent chills through my body, starting from where his hand was connected to mine. I looked up into the most beautiful sea of forest green eyes I had ever come into contact with.

"Ummm… it's not… uh… your fault. I'm such a klutz," I laughed, but it came out sounding strained and awkward.

"Are you okay? Did you get hurt when you hit the ground? You hit hard, and it sounded pretty brutal," he asked me with a crooked smile that melted my heart and singed my soul. I felt the heat rising into my face again, and I turned my eyes away from his.

"I'm fine, just embarrassed," I sighed while continuing to pick up the items off the floor, but he grabbed my hand again to stop me.

"They get paid to pick this shit up. Just leave it. Here, let me help you up." He pulled on my hand as he stood, so I went up with him. The last thing I needed to do was make him fall too by resisting his help.

"Thanks, but I need to pick it up anyway. I've been in here for an hour looking for that stuff, and I'm not about to go search again." I smiled before bending down to retrieve my notebook that was lying down on the ground. It contained my list, but as I reached for it, his hand snatched it up.

"You must be new here then. I'll help you find it all. I'm Edward, by the way," the guy grinned at me, and as I looked at him again, I noticed the shock of bronze colored hair that sat in an organized mess over his head.

"Yeah, I'm visiting my Dad for the summer. I'm Bella," I replied shyly. He retrieved both our empty baskets from the floor and motioned for me to follow him.

"So who's your dad? This is an awful small town," he laughed as he grabbed something from the shelf and set it into my basket.

"Charlie Swan," I replied easily. Edward hesitated for a moment before continuing down the aisle.

"Oh, the Chief's daughter, huh? Bet that sucks." He smiled at me, but it seemed forced.

"I'm going to assume by your hesitation and grimace that you have been in some trouble, right?" I laughed as he nodded his head sheepishly at me.

"You could say that. Let's just say that your father hates me and would have my balls if he saw me talking to you." Edward's relaxed demeanor returned, and I wondered why my father would hate him, but I didn't want to seem nosey by asking.

"I'm a big girl, and I can make decisions on my own about who I talk to. Charlie's actually pretty laid back when it comes to me." I tried to steal my list from him as we walked but he lifted it over his head and stuck his tongue out at me.

"Didn't I tell you I was going to help you out? You're not getting this back until we've gotten everything on your list." Edward's crooked smile was back, and I loved the playful personality he was showing. It made me comfortable.

"That was really mature." I rolled my eyes at him and allowed him to continue placing things into my basket.

"So you said you're here for the summer. How long is that?" he asked casually.

"Eight long weeks," I groaned out. He turned his head to look at me and raised an eyebrow in question. "My mom is going on a European honeymoon with her new husband. I agreed to stay up here with Charlie while she's gone," I explained.

"That's awfully considerate of you. I mean, leaving your home and all your friends to come here for eight weeks. It's terribly boring." He sighed dramatically, and I couldn't contain my giggles.

"Yeah, well the worst part was leaving my best friend behind. We're like sisters, and she was going to come with me, but some family stuff came up…" I trailed off on my sentence, not wanting to explain that situation.

"That does suck, but I'll tell you what I'm going to do for you since you're such a sweet girl and all. I would feel absolutely horrible knowing that you're stuck with nobody to hang out with all summer, so… I'm going to let you hang out with me," he stated in a matter of fact tone.

"Now what makes you think that I'd want to hang out with you all summer?" I questioned him with raised eyebrows as we halted in the aisle and stood facing each other.

"I think that because I know for a fact that I am the coolest kid in this town. Besides, I have a pool, and I'm the only person you know right now so I think I'm your only choice at the moment." His smug expression caused a laugh to bubble up from my throat.

"The pool thing is the only cool points you've got with me so far. I guess you do kind of owe me for knocking me out back there and then screaming at me for it." My matching smug expression didn't last very long before we both laughed.

**EPOV**

After meeting Bella at the store, I was in a state of shock. I gave her my number and even loaded her groceries into her over-filled truck. We laughed and joked like old friends while we walked around, and I was overly excited to talk to her again.

My day had started out to be rather boring. I was hanging out with my best friend, Jasper, while his bitch of a sister wouldn't leave me alone. I couldn't remember how many times I told her that she wasn't my type and that I wouldn't be fucking my best buddy's little sister anyway. She always threw out the argument that she was only younger by five minutes, but it didn't sway me.

I wasn't into the blondes. I really had only dated a few people in Forks because that all drove me nuts. I couldn't get a minute's peace with a girl following me everywhere and wanting to know everything I did. I wasn't into that. I needed my space, and I craved my freedom.

Jasper and I spent most summers pulling stupid pranks around town. Chief Swan wasn't our biggest fan after we cherry bombed the toilets in the diner. The place was closed for a week and we ended up with 120 hours of community service a piece as well as washing dishes for free until we would have earned enough to pay for the repairs. That was a shitty few months.

I had gone to the store to pick up some movie snacks and pizza for our usual Saturday night drag, and while I was grabbing a box of microwave popcorn, something slammed into me, sending the entire contents of my basket to the floor. I cursed before I looked down and saw the shaking frame of a small, pale brunette at my feet.

Feeling guilty for being such an ass, I apologized, and when she looked up at me, I thought my heart had stopped. I stared into big, round, glassy chocolate orbs. The most intense and delicious scent of strawberries engulfed me and about took me to my knees. I felt a ridiculous draw to the fragile girl in front of me.

Bella and I spent an hour walking around the store laughing and talking. We didn't get into anything deep, but I felt like she was comfortable with me, so I wrote my number down for her as we both checked out. I wanted to ask her to hang out with Jasper and me, but I thought that might be pushing it. The only thing I could hope for was that she called me and didn't think I was a total nut case.

"Dude, you're fucking late! I'm starved here! What the hell took you so damn long?" Jasper growled out as I strolled into my basement theatre.

"I was temporarily detained. Did you know that Chief Swan has a fuck-all gorgeous daughter?" I asked as I plopped down and passed him the pizza box.

"Everyone knows he has a daughter, dip shit. How do you know she's fuck-all gorgeous?" He dug into the pizza as he spoke. I rolled my eyes at his lack of manners before continuing.

"Well, I literally ran into her at the store… I guess she actually ran into me, but still. I helped her finish her shopping, and she's pretty fucking cool." I shrugged my shoulders, trying to act uninterested, but Jasper froze with the slice of pizza half way to his open mouth as his eyes turned toward me.

"What did you just say? I thought you hated bossy, bitchy women," he quoted my favorite term.

"Well, she does have some small advantages that make her more attractive. She'll only be here for the summer. Who doesn't love a summer fling?" I smirked as I grabbed myself some pizza.

"Don't fuck with Chief Swan's daughter, dude. You know for a fact that man hates you. You better not be trying to get into her pants _just_ because of who her father is. That would be hard core cold," Jasper lectured. I rolled my eyes again at him.

"Of course not. I thought she was hot and started talking to her before I knew who she was. I gave her my number and told her she could hang out with us. Maybe her and Rose will hit it off." I shrugged my thoughts away, but Jasper slapped my head, hard.

"Edward, are you trying to get the poor girl killed? Rose will _kill_ her and bury her in the backyard if she knew that you wanted her." His voice was full of irritation as he glared at me.

"Rosalie knows that I don't want her that way. Besides, I think that they could really be friends. Rosalie needs some estrogen in her life. She only spends time with us and your dad." I laughed as I pictured where Rose was right now. I knew she was getting her weekly lesson from Papa Hale in the garage with their old Chevy truck.

"You do have a point there, Cullen," Jasper conceded as he pressed play on our gory action film of the evening.

Jasper pulled out the Jack after we finished eating, and I grabbed the weed. My parents were completely cool with it as long as it stayed in the house with only Jasper and me involved. I was six sheets to the wind when my phone started blaring out _Down_ by Jay Sean. I grinned like the stoned fool I was and flipped open my phone to answer it.

"Hello, beautiful! I was hoping you'd call!" I called out a little too loudly. I waited for a reply, but the line was completely silent. "Bella?" I questioned but was again met by silence. My forehead crinkled in confusion as I looked down at the screen on my phone.

"What's up, dude?" Jasper asked in a very relaxed voice.

"I'm fucking stoned, dude. It's a damn text message from her," I laughed at my stupidity before opening the message.

_It's Bella, umm… what are you doing tomorrow? My dad was supposed to be on vacation, but he got called in._

My face light up like a fool with my toothy grin. Jasper rolled his eyes as he took another hit of the bowl we were passing followed by a swing of Jack.

_I'll call you in the morning, and we'll figure something out._ I sent back before laying back in the couch with a satisfied smirk on my lips. I stopped drinking and smoking after that and allowed myself to pass out peacefully.

**BPOV**

I sent a text message to Edward hoping he would answer it, but praying that I didn't sound desperate. I just didn't want to spend my entire vacation sitting in Charlie's house alone. He seemed like a nice enough guy, and I was sure he was exaggerating about Charlie's opinion of him. I was excited when Edward agreed to hang out. I allowed myself to fall asleep upon receiving the message so I would be well rested in the morning.

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**Review if you enjoyed and want to read more!**


	3. Delusions of Grandeur

**Authors Note: Thanks for those of you reading and reviewing. Again thanks to my beta who has kept my faith in this project alive, twilight-is-lovee.**

Playlist:_  
Don't Trust Me_ by 3OH!3  
_Bad Girlfriend_ by Theory of a Deadman  
_What I Like About You_ by Lillix  
_Cowboy Casanova_ by Carrie Underwood  
_Girlfriend_ by Avril Lavigne  
_Misery Business_ by Paramore  
_Toxic_ by Britney Spears

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**EPOV**

Bella and I had agreed to meet at the grocery store, and I would show her around. I didn't really have many plans. Showing her Forks would only take an hour, and that's stretching it. I wanted to have her come back to my place, but I didn't want her to think I was trying to get into her pants. My first thought was to invite Rose and Jasper to come along, but I kind of figured that might have been a little overwhelming for Bella.

"So where are you headed today? Please promise me that you and Jasper are going to stay out of trouble. I can't deal with any more run-ins with Chief Swan right now," my mother sighed as slid into the barstool across from her.

"I'm not going to get into any trouble, but if Chief Swan finds out what I am doing today, then he might just shoot me anyway." I smirk at her. My mother, Esme Cullen, was the sweetest and most laid-back woman to ever walk the earth.

"Edward Anthony, what are you planning?" she questioned in her stern voice. I tried to bite back my laugh, but it came out anyway. My mother couldn't be stern to save her life. I saw her crack a small smile before turning her head away from me.

"Umm… well did you know that Chief Swan's daughter is in town? I kinda ran into her at the store yesterday, and well, we talked a little. She's really nice, and she has this sexy innocent thing going on. Anyway, I'm going to give her a tour of Forks today." I smiled up at her, but she was shaking her head with a grimace plaster on her face.

"Do you really think that's such a good idea? You know that man hates you. His daughter is his everything. He won't stand for you screwing around with her. Think this through before you go trying to get this girl in bed." She gave me a warning look, and I sighed.

"Mom, I didn't have any intention on dragging her to my bed. Give me some credit here. I just figured she could use a friend while she was her. I thought maybe her and Rose would get along," I mumbled the last part knowing what her reaction would be.

"Edward! You know perfectly well that Rosalie will bring tears to that poor child! She isn't exactly a friendly girl. Introduce her to some of those girls you hang out with occasionally." My mom smirked at me and I looked away in shame. She knew what my reputation was like, but she said it was my issue to deal with, and as long as I did it safely and got checked, she couldn't exactly stop me.

"That is definitely not going to be happening. Alright, I've got to meet her soon, so I'm heading out. I'll see you tonight. Love you, Mom!" I called out as I rushed out the door and to my Volvo.

I sent out a text to Jasper letting him know that I wouldn't be seeing him until later and that I'd let him know what time I would be home. He asked if he could meet Bella, and I told him it might be a little soon, but the real thoughts in my head were that I didn't want to share her.

The thought stopped me in my tracks. I couldn't believe that those thoughts were coming from me about a girl I barely knew. Hell, all I knew was her name and that she was Charlie Swan's daughter. I couldn't feel possessive of her with that little information.

I shook my head and laughed at myself as I pulled into the grocery store parking lot. I was acting like a complete idiot, and a desperate one at that. I parked next to the beast of a truck that Bella drove and watched her as she sat in the cab of the truck completely oblivious to my presence.

Her long, silky brown hair was hanging free around her and fell to about mid back. She had her head leaning back on the seat and her chocolaty brown eyes were closed while a small smile played at the edge of her lips. I watched in total amazement as her tongue peaked out to graze her bottom lip before her teeth pulled it into her mouth. My pants tightened as I felt myself growing hard at the image. It had been entirely too long since my last rendezvous.

I climbed out of my car and knocked on the driver's side window of her truck to get her attention. Bella's head snapped up, and as she looked at me, her cheeks tinted pink with her embarrassment. As she pushed open the door, I could hear the faint sound of music just before she turned the key and climbed out of the cab.

_No one really knows if she's drunk or if she's stoned  
But she's coming back to my place tonight  
I say  
No one really knows just how far she's gonna go  
But I'm gonna find out later tonight_

I knew those lyrics. I listened to them a lot. I didn't see her as the kind of girl to listen to Theory of a Deadman, and especially not _Bad Girlfriend_. My pants tightened more at the idea of the dirty words coming from the innocent lips of the girl in front of me.

"Erhm… so Theory of a Deadman, huh? I love them. Nice taste in music," I cleared my throat and tried to adjust myself without her noticing.

"Yeah, my iPod is like those Harry Potter jelly beans… you never know what kind of fucked up thing is going to come out next, but even if it's weird, you might just like it." She laughed at her lame joke, and I smiled as I rolled my eyes.

"Sounds like mine, although I don't think I ever liked any of those fuck nasty jelly beans. I mean, seriously. Have you ever thought about how they actually make those things?" I questioned as I opened her car door and gestured for her to climb in.

"Umm… no not really. I never thought about it until now." She blushed before I shut her door, walked over to mine, and climbed in behind the wheel.

"Well, they have to know what all that stuff tastes like in order to compare those jelly beans to the real thing, right? So what did they do? Pick their noses and eat it to find out what it should taste like? And what about vomit? Who would actually taste vomit voluntarily?" I let a dramatic shiver race down my back as she let out a loud peal of laughter.

"Oh my God, Edward! That is so disgusting! I can't believe you would think of that, but you're so right! What about rotten egg? God, how much did these people get paid to taste test all these things. They had to have done it continuously for the comparisons of all the trials." Bella's cute nose scrunched up in displeasure, and I couldn't contain my laugh. Her happiness was contagious.

"You know they make even more of those now? They have ketchup, onion, sausage, pickle, mashed potatoes, and even skunk odor. Now you tell me who in their right might would come up with making skunk odor into a piece of candy, not to mention who would volunteer for the taste testing of that jelly bean." I cringed at the thought as Bella laughed breathlessly next to me. I turned my head to see her clutching her stomach and wiping her eyes as she tried to catch her breath. It made me feel good to know I could make her laugh like that.

"Oh… God. I can picture that meeting… 'No way dude, I'm so not fucking touching that shit.' 'Not ever, I drew the short straw on vomit. I'm so out on this one.' 'You fucking pussies, bring it on!' That would be from some macho man that would gag and throw up everywhere after tasting skunk odor!" Bella giggled as she spoke, and I laughed with her. It was so easy and comfortable to be around her.

"Okay, okay… we've gotta stop… or I'll have to pull over. I… I can't… fucking breath!" I cried out as I tried to keep my eyes on the road through my laughter.

"Whew! I think I just lost a few pounds from laughing so hard." Bella's breath whooshed out of her as she caught her breath and calmed herself down.

"I think you might have a point. I feel a million times lighter. Who knew that jelly beans could be such an ice breaker?" I smiled back at her as I calmed down and she broke out in a small round of giggles as she mumbled about herself. I could just see her mind working to picture the conversation she had conjured in her head.

"Now where to first, Miss Swan," I drawled in my fake southern gentleman accent, causing Bella to break out into another small fit of giggles.

"You're accent is horrible! What are you supposed to be, a Jersey boy?" she snorted through her laughed and covered her mouth, only to begin laughing harder.

"Good lord, woman! That was ridiculous. Did that really come from you?" I asked with falsified awe, and she swatted at me. It felt like we were great friends who had known each other for a long time.

"Yes, that came from me! Edward you have got to stop making me laugh. My stomach and my cheeks are starting to hurt." Bella giggled a little but settled back into her seat. I smiled over at her as we drove through Forks, and I showed her where everything she would need have access to over the summer was located.

Bella and I drove around the tiny town of Forks for three hours. We laughed and talked about everything that came to mind. I asked her about her mom and Phoenix. She asked me about my family and my friends. I discovered that she loved to read, especially the classics. She wanted to go to school and study literature to become a college professor. I told her about my dreams to become a pediatrician.

"Wow, a pediatrician? So you like kids then?" Bella asked as we sat in the diner eating a late lunch.

"Yes, I do. I don't know what it is, but I could be having the worst day of my life and a baby being placed in my arms makes it all go away. It sounds cheesy, but I really think it's my calling. My dad's a surgeon, and I'm sure he's going to be a little disappointed that I won't be taking that route, but I know he'll understand." I shrugged my shoulders before leaning back against the booth behind me.

"I don't think I could be in healthcare. I think that all those people who are sick and in pain all the time would be so hard to be around. Don't you think it will be hard to see kids hurting?" she questioned with a pained look in her eyes.

"That's the point. I would want to do something, anything to help them and take that pain away for them. I think the hardest part is going to be keeping myself unattached and unemotional about it all," I sighed as I revealed this to Bella. I had never thought I would be telling these fears to anyone. I felt like it made me weak, but with Bella, I didn't care so much. I just wanted her to understand me.

"That's probably the sweetest thing I've ever heard. You shouldn't be ashamed of the fact that you care, you know that?" Her hand reached out and squeezed mine, sending a shock through my hand.

**BPOV**

I felt the shock as I touched his hand. I had to resist the urge to yank my hand back. The power behind that shock was staggering, and it made me nervous. The entire day we drove around Forks talking and laughing. I didn't bother to mention that I had a GPS. I loved spending time with him. It was all so easy and came naturally.

After our lunch, we headed out to Edward's house to hang out. He warned me that his house was huge and that I shouldn't feel uncomfortable there because his parents were really down to earth people. I was still nervous because I was going into _his_ house and meeting his _parents_.

I wanted to cry when he pulled up to the house after driving down a horrendously long gravel path. This structure, I refused to downgrade it by calling it a house any longer, was three stories high with a deck that surrounded the entire thing. There deck was also three stories long and I saw that there were French doors that led to the decks on each floor in several different areas. There was an enormous garage to the left of the main building that probably held at least ten cars.

"I know you said not to feel uncomfortable, but your house is bigger than my house and my dad's house combined. I feel like I'm about to enter a museum." I gawked at the massive door as we climbed the stairs of the porch.

"It's not that big. My mom just likes a lot of room. You'll see it's just like any other house once you see the inside." Edward sounded slightly uncomfortable, and I turned to see him giving me a small half smile. I took a deep breath and followed him through the front door.

"This is not like any other house!" I cried out as my eyes fell onto the open foyer. The foyer led into a hallway that I could see opened into an incredible gourmet kitchen. To the left of the foyer was an open den with a fireplace and I could see bookcases on the walls. To the right was a formal dining room that could probably seat twenty people. On both sides of the foyer, there were staircases that led up to a balcony that looked over the lower floor. Looking there, I could see the balcony on the third floor that looked down onto the foyer also.

"What do you mean? We have a kitchen, dining room, living room, bedrooms, and bathrooms just like anyone else would." Edward smirked at me as he pulled me along down the hall toward the kitchen. He stopped in the middle of it and led me down a flight of stairs hidden behind a door. We came down into a dream game room complete with an indoor hot tub as well as a movie theatre screen.

"This is incredible! What it must have been like to grow up like this!" I spun around taking everything in that surrounded me as Edward laughed.

"Haven't had this that long. We weren't this well off until my dad finished his residency and made some smart investment choices. We only moved to Forks when I was a freshman," Edward informed me as he walked over to a bar-like setup and pulled out two bottles of water.

"Thank you… um… so you must be pretty popular with this lifestyle," I hinted. I was incredibly curious about how he acted around other people.

"Nah, not really. That's my choice. I like the few friends I have, and I don't advertise my parent's wealth. I want people to like me for who I am and not what I have." He shrugged and plopped down on a plush sectional in the center of the room.

"Well, I completely understand that line of thinking," I sympathized as he stared at me with a cocked eyebrow. "What?" I replied to his expression.

"Are you just going to stand there or are you going to sit down and stay a while?" he questioned sarcastically. I felt myself blush and turned my head away as I took a seat on the other end of the couch.

"It's not like I could just leave even if I wanted to. My truck is still at the grocery store," I informed him in the same sarcastic manner.

"That is very true. I guess you're not leaving until I get sick of you then." He sent me that ridiculously sexy crooked smirk. I felt my heart stutter and restart at the sight of it. I felt light-headed as he flipped on the movie screen in front of us.

"So what are we watching?" I was only talking so I could distract myself. He shrugged his shoulders and flipped through channels until he got to a music channel he seemed to enjoy before turning his body on the couch to face me. I turned myself to face him and set my legs cross-legged.

"I thought we could use this as background noise while we talked some more. I hope you don't mind, but I invited my friend Jasper and his twin sister over." Edward gave me a cautious look that made me laugh.

"Why would I mind? This is your house, and I'm not like socially inept here. I would love to meet your friends." I gave him a reassuring smile that reflected none of my inner turmoil. I was completely nervous about meeting these people. I hadn't even met Edward's parents.

"Oh, here comes my mom. MOM! COME IN THE GAME ROOM!" he cried out into the room and I cringed at the sound. He gave me an apologetic smile as I heard the clicking of heals on the hardwood floor.

"Edward, how many times have I told you not to scream across this house? I'm not a dog that you call for. Now, what is it you need?" A beautiful woman with wavy caramel colored hair and deep green eyes appeared from a side hallway I hadn't noticed before. She wore a pressed designer skirt suit and Gucci heels that Alice would have killed for.

"I want you to meet Bella Swan. She's the Chief's daughter." Edward sounded smug as he spoke to his mother. I blushed in embarrassment as she studied me.

"Well, Bella, it's lovely to meet you. I'm Esme Cullen, and I apologize now if my son does anything inappropriate. Edward, you're right, she is a very beautiful girl." Esme smiled at me as she held her hand out for me to shake it. I blushed a deep red at her comment and kept my eyes away from Edward as I shook his mother's hand.

"Thank you, Mrs. Cullen. You have a beautiful home, and it's great to meet you, too." I gave her the best smile I could muster, and I caught the wink she gave me, which completely confused me.

"Call me Esme, dear. I hope you have a good evening, and I understand that Rosalie is coming over. Let me give you some advice when it comes to her. Whatever she throws at you, throw it right back," Esme spoke sternly before she turned and left down the same hall she had come in through.

"Um… yeah… so you said you're here for eight weeks right? That's pretty cool." Edward stumbled over his words and shifted uncomfortably on the couch.

"So, you told your mom I was beautiful?" I quirked my eyebrows in question at him and internally gaped at my sudden boost of confidence as I watched him squirm around restlessly on the couch.

"Actually, I told her that you had this sexy innocent thing going on. I'm not going to lie; I find you very attractive Bella." Edward's confidence was back in full force, and his gaze pierced through me and sent shivers up my spine.

"I… um… well, thank you?" I voiced it as more of a question than a statement. He laughed as he leaned back into the couch.

"You're welcome, Bella. So, we have a pool table, air hockey, table tennis, foosball, and even pinball. What tickles your fancy?" he asked me in the same ridiculous southern gentleman accent he had used in the car. I burst out into a fit of giggles and fell from the couch still laughing at him.

"You are absolutely ridiculous!" I choked out through my laughter.

"I am not. Are you alright? You hit your head pretty hard when you fell." Edward's voice dripped with concern as he leaned over me and reached out for my head. I tried to sit up, but he pushed me back down by my shoulders.

"I'm fine. It's not like I haven't hit my head before. Don't worry about it," I reassured him, but I felt his fingers glide into my hair and he began to caress my scalp. I fought to hold back a moan of appreciation but my eyes slid closed anyway.

"I don't feel anything. I guess you didn't hit it as hard as I thought you did." His voice was soft and right next to my face. I could feel his warm breath fan across my face.

"Yeah," I managed the single word. I opened my eyes slowly to see his face extremely close to mine. I felt my heartbeat quicken again, and my thoughts all went fuzzy. His scent of rain and musk filled my senses, and I felt like I was drowning.

"Dude, where are you, Edward? " a voice cried out into the room. I stiffened in shock at the interruption. Edward's body had the same reaction, and he dropped me back onto the floor where my head bounced against the hardwood.

"Oh, God, Bella, I'm so sorry!" He reached down to help me up, but I waved him off as I sat up and rubbed the back of my head. I may not have felt the hit when I fell of the couch, but the second hit would definitely leave a bump.

"Don't worry about it. I'm fine." I forced the words out through clenched teeth and pulled myself up off the floor to a standing position.

"Well, hello there, beautiful. I'm Jasper." The blonde mood killer stepped up to me with his hand extended. I politely shook his hand and took a seat on the couch, still rubbing my tender head.

"I'm Bella. It's nice to meet you." I grimaced as I spoke, and both boys took a seat.

"Bella? What a shitty name. It doesn't even fit you. You are not a beauty," a female voice snorted from behind me. I turned to find a tall, thin blonde wearing glasses and baggy clothes to hide her features. I studied her and noticed she wore no make-up and her hair was thrown up into a messy bun behind her head, but she was a gorgeous girl underneath the layers she used to hide herself.

"Rosalie, Bella is a guest here! Can you please show a little bit of respect?" Edward's tone was annoyed, and Rosalie was glaring at him. She pouted heavily and took a seat on the sectional so close to Edward that she was practically on his lap.

"Guest my ass. I saw you two on the floor. You just met her, Edward, and you're already trying to seduce her? Damn, she must be a whore," Rosalie spoke to Edward as if I wasn't even in the room. He shook his head, moved away from her on the couch, and placed a decorative pillow between the two of them.

"You don't know what you're talking about, Rose, and if you can't be respectful, then you can just fucking leave." Edward's voice was full of venom as he defended me to his friend.

"Just ignore those two. This is how Rosalie always acts. I'm sorry about her, by the way. We thought you two might get along, but I guess that's not going to happen," Jasper leaned in to whisper in my ear. I cringed back slightly from the unexpected contact, but he just laughed at my reaction.

"What does she have against me? She doesn't even know me," I whispered back in an awed voice. I couldn't believe that she would hate me when she didn't even know me.

"My sister has a little 'thing' for Edward. If she suspects that either of you likes the other, then she's like a vicious dog and she attacks. Really, just ignore her." Jasper shrugged his shoulders and turned back to the television.

"Just fucking leave, Rosalie. Do I really need to explain this to you again? I don't like you as anything more than my best friend's twin sister. You can be cool, but not when you act like you have some sick fucking right to me! I'm not going to date you! Get over it!" Edward's tone was loud, and I felt guilty as I watched Rosalie's shoulder's slump and her eyes glaze over with tears before she stood up and stormed out of the room.

"Damn, that was pretty harsh, bro," Jasper commented, but didn't move to leave. I stood up and glared at both of them.

"Harsh? That was just fucking cruel what you did to her!" I shouted at them as I took off through the maze of a basement trying to track down Rosalie. I wandered around for a few minutes before I heard some sniffling behind a door on the left of a hallway toward the laundry room.

I knocked on the door and waited, but the only response I got was complete silence. I knocked again and was rewarded with a loud shriek.

"Rosalie? It's Bella, can I come in?" I asked quietly, but there was no response. I stood by the door and waited to see if she would open it. After five minutes of silence, I heard the lock click and the door creaked open.

"What the hell do you want? This is your fucking fault," she spat at me as she glared through the crack in the door.

"I'll ignore that comment. I came to tell you that what Edward just did to you was cruel and uncalled for. Can I come in and talk?" I asked softly. Rosalie snorted and slammed the door in my face. I sighed as I knocked on the door again. "Listen, I'm just trying to help. If you change your mind, just let me know," I spoke to the closed door before turning and walking down the hallway toward the sounds and lights from the television.

"Bella, wait. Come on in," her small voice called out to me. I hid my smile of triumph and turned to follow her into the bathroom that was larger than my bedroom.

"Damn, they certainly know how to live, don't they?" I gasped as I took in the room. Rosalie rolled her eyes and took a seat on the loveseat in the room. Yes, they _actually_ had a loveseat in the bathroom.

"Okay, look, you need to stay away from Edward. I've been trying to get his attention for years, and I won't let you walk in here and take that from me. You're a woman and you understand the rules of not stealing another girl's man," Rosalie's voice was stern and serious. I couldn't contain the laughter that bubbled up my throat.

"I'm not laughing at you. What makes you think that I would stay away from him if I wanted him just because someone I don't even know wants him? Besides, you could have any guy you want. You just need to look in a mirror. Edward was just the biggest asshole to you, and you still want him. That is completely messed up," I informed her. I had seen Alice go through these stupid crushes, and I needed to stop this girl from going after someone who had no interest in her and just waste her time with it. All she'd end up with would be a broken heart.

"Guys don't look at a girl who's into everything they are. They assume that because I like to work on cars and play football that I'm a lesbian," she sighed and then froze before her hand slapped over her mouth. "I can't believe I just told that to a total stranger," she voiced in shock.

"It's okay. I completely understand. I'm practically invisible back home. I have this drop dead gorgeous, rich ass best friend who gets all the attention." I smiled fondly as I tried to comfort her. I missed Alice more in that moment than I had since we had said goodbye. She would have known what to do.

"Well, I'm sick and tired of people thinking of me that way! I want it to change." Her voice was dark and scary as I saw her eyes cloud over with malice.

"I'm not so good at the make-over stuff, but maybe I can help a little? I can call my friend Alice and maybe put her on video chat. We can get her to help us?" I suggested. I needed a friend I could connect with here. It just wasn't the same for me without that female connection I was so used to everyday.

"You would do that even though I was a complete bitch to you?" she asked as she peered up at me. I nodded my head yes, and she wrapped me into a warm, friendly hug. "I'm sorry I said all those things to you."

"Don't worry about it. You were trying to protect what you want. I completely understand, and really, how can I blame you? That boy is sexy as all hell!" I laughed and patted her on the back before we heard a loud thump and a grumble from the doorway.

"GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM THE DOOR, YOU ASSHOLES!" Rosalie shouted as she flung the door open to reveal Jasper and Edward lying in a heap on the floor.

"You dumbass, Edward, we could have listened in for more juicy stuff, but you had to freak when Bella called you sexy," Jasper mumbled as he shoved Edward off him and climbed to his feet. I saw Rosalie grimace and glare at Edward for a moment before she composed herself.

"So, you guys are getting along then?" Edward asked with an innocent smile. I laughed and nudged him with my foot as Rosalie and I stepped over him and followed Jasper back to the theatre room.

**EPOV**

I was mortified by the actions of not only my mother but Rosalie. First Bella finds out I think she's hot, and then Jasper interrupts what would have been the perfect moment to kiss her. I drop her ass on the floor and cause her to smack her head again. To top it all off and make it perfect, Rosalie goes cave woman on me and tries to mark her territory while insulting Bella to no end. I was beyond pissed when she stormed out but got a major dose of reality when Bella screamed at me about my behavior.

"So, things seem to be going well for you today." Jasper snickered as he shoveled some nuts into his mouth. I tossed a pillow at his head and growled at him.

"You fucking cock sucker. I was so close to feeling those perfect lips against mine! I thought I told you to rein in your bitch of a sister _before_ you brought her over here!" I complained as he glared at me.

"Rose is not my responsibility. Besides, it looks like Bella can handle herself pretty well." Jasper grinned and waggled his eyebrows at me. I rolled my eyes and slouched back against the couch. We were content watching the music videos until we heard a shriek.

Jasper and I both bolted off the couch toward the bathroom on the basement floor without a word. We saw Bella talking to Rosalie and then the door slammed. Bella said something through the door and turned to leave but Rosalie pulled her into the room.

"Let's go make sure they aren't killing each other," I suggested. Jasper and I inched down the hall and then pressed our ears to the door only to hear the entire conversation from the bathroom.

Jasper broke out into hysterics when he heard the girls talking about me. I thought I would faint when I heard Bella say I was hot. I wanted to rip the door open and press my lips to hers, but before I knew it, Jasper kicked the door and then it flew open.

We lay in a heap at their feet as they chastised us for eavesdropping. I wanted to laugh, but I couldn't, so instead I changed the subject and tried to diffuse the situation. I would talk to Bella about what was said when I went to drove her home.

* * *

**Show me some love!**


	4. Daddy Dearest

**Author Note: Just wanted to give a thanks to my beta twilight-is-lovee cause she's awesome! **

**Playlist:**_  
Naturally_ by Selena Gomez  
_Crush_ by David Archuleta  
_Sure About It_ by Hanson  
_Smile_ by Uncle Kracker  
_Falling Slowly_ by Kris Allen  
_Our Time Now_ by Plain White T's

* * *

**BPOV**

The rest of the evening spent with Edward, Jasper, and Rosalie was extremely entertaining. I laughed so hard I cried. Jasper and Rosalie were the epitome of opposite. Jasper was laidback and cool-headed while Rosalie was a sparking fuse with an easy switch that air could activate. I watched as Edward tried to mediate and Rosalie pelted them both with popcorn and pillows repeatedly.

"Wow, is this how you three always act? My stomach hurts I've been laughing so hard," I gasped during a lull in the amusement.

"At least you find us humorous. Mom threatens me all the time about our arguing." Jasper laughed and put his feet up on the coffee table. That one movement was enough to start Rosalie going again. Her head whipped around and a harsh glare landed on Jasper's feet. I heard both Edward and Jasper groan.

"Tables are made for plates and glasses not for people's feet and asses you fucking slob. Get your nasty ass shoes off the table where our food and drinks are at," Rosalie's voice was filled with malice, and I couldn't stop the giggle that bubbled up. She turned her gaze on me.

"Nu-uh, there is no way you're involving me in this shit. I'm only here for the entertainment factor." I held my hands up in surrender as I grinned at her. She sent a subtle wink my way and continued to lay into Jasper about his bad manners.

"You know, it's no wonder you don't have a girlfriend, Jazz. You're disgusting! I mean, just look at yourself in a mirror sometime for Christ sake!" she cried out, and I caught her pushing back a slight smile.

"Well, Rosalie, I can definitely understand why you don't date and why Edward isn't interested in you. It's like being around a damn Nazi concentration camp with you! Breath the wrong way and they'll gas your ass!" Jasper ground out as he glared back at his sister. His feet were still propped up on the table while he wiggled them in Rosalie's direction.

"Come on, Bella, let's get you outta the line of fire," Edward leaned over and whispered into my ear. A small shiver ripped through my body before his hand gripped mine and pulled me up from the couch.

"Um… it was nice meeting you guys. Rose, you can get my number from Edward and give me a call about what we talked about earlier." I waved as I walked past, and they both acknowledged me with nods but didn't deter from their stare down.

"I'm really sorry about them. Believe it or not, that was a toned down version of those two," Edward gave me an apologetic smile, but I waved him off as we ascended the stairs.

"It's really no big deal. I thought it was hilarious. That was the most I've laughed in years. I seriously feel like I just ran a few miles; my whole body aches." I smiled at him and felt the muscles in my cheeks protest. I reached up to rub at the ache, but Edward's hands were already there.

"You're beautiful, you know that?" he asked me quietly. I stared at him as the emotions flitted across his face so fast I couldn't discern them.

"Thank you…" I was unsure of how to react to his declaration. It was so sweet and intimate that it caught me off guard. We'd only known each other for twenty-four hours, but I felt like I had known him my entire life. There was an incredibly strong pull between us that I couldn't explain.

"There's no reason to thank me, Bella; I'm only stating the truth." He sighed as he dropped his hand, and I immediately felt the loss of the exquisite electricity his touch brought with him.

"Well, it's getting kind of late. I think you should probably be getting me back to my truck…" I let my statement trail off as he started walking toward the front door. He opened the door for me and led me back to his car where he again opened the door for me to enter. I slid into the passenger seat and proceeded to buckle myself in as I watched him climb into his seat. He shifted around uncomfortably a few times before turning to look at me.

"Can I ask you something without you feeling like I'm crazy?" He sounded nervous and wouldn't meet my eyes.

"Of course you can ask, but I can't guarantee the crazy thing because that is already kind of cemented in my brain." I smiled at him to try to lighten the mood. He let a small smile grace his lips before he took a deep breath and looked me in the eye.

"At the risk of sounding like a mental case, I wanna tell you that I think you're amazing and I really think there is already something between us. I felt it the second I saw you in that damn grocery store and I feel it now. I know it's only been twenty-four hours sense I met you, but I feel like I've known you my entire life. You already know more about me than Jasper does, and that's saying a lot. Would you go out on a real date with me?" The words he spoke all sort of blended together with the speed of delivery, but I understood every word he had said and I felt like he had been reading directly from my inner monologue.

"You know what's really crazy? I've had those exact thoughts swirling in my head all day. You know me better than anyone does, and I'm so much more comfortable around you than I have ever been with anyone else, including my own parents. There's something about you, Edward Cullen, and I just can't put my finger on it, but I would love to go out on a 'real' date with you." I giggled at the last part and felt my heart melt as Edward's face flushed and his breath whooshed out of him.

"Damn, that made me nervous. I though you would laugh in my face when I said all that." His crooked smile was back in place and at full wattage. I relaxed into the seat as he drove me to the grocery store. His hand automatically gripped mine and the current flowing between us was at full force.

The drive back to my truck was quiet and comfortable. Neither of us felt the need to fill the silence with mindless chatter, and that was perfect for me. I loved the way that Edward's thumb would rub over my knuckles affectionately and how he would bring my hand to his mouth every so often to place a chaste kiss on my palm. I felt so connected with him in that car, but like everything, our bubble of peace couldn't last forever.

"Thank you for today. I had an incredible time. Your friends are great and your house in gorgeous," I sighed as he put the car in park next to my truck.

"Thank you for coming out with me. I'm glad you had a good time. It was a relief not being the only one in between Jazz and Rose." His signature smile was still in place as he climbed out of the car and opened my door for me before reaching in to take my hand in order to help me out of the car.

"So, call me when you want to schedule that date of yours." My tone was playful and he gripped my hand tightly in his.

"Tomorrow, I want it tomorrow. You're addicting, Bella Swan. I have a feeling we'll be seeing a lot of each other over the next eight weeks." He leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss to my cheek before he pulled me into a tight hug. I wrapped my arms around his waist and buried my head in his chest so I could breathe him in.

"I'm pretty sure you know where my house is, so you can pick me up there if you want," I suggested, but back tracked when I saw him blanch at the suggestion. He stared at me wide eyed without speaking for a long time. I started to get nervous and felt myself blush as I started to fidget.

**EPOV**

Pick her up from her _house_? Me, go to Chief Swan's house to pick up his _daughter_ for a date? I wouldn't make it out of my car before a shot gun was shoved down my throat. I hadn't thought this whole thing through. If I was going out on dates with Bella, she would surely want me to get along with her father. I could make a go of it, but I doubted the Chief would give me a chance to prove myself worthy of his only daughter's affections.

"Um… we could always meet here again," Bella's meek voice broke through my panic attack. I shook my head quickly and grabbed her hands again.

"I don't want to do that to you. It's not fair. I'm just worried is all. You know that your father hates me, and I like all my body parts, so… I just don't want to piss him off even more by showing up at his house to pick up his daughter for a date with the kid he thinks is a useless juvenile delinquent," I explained cautiously. Bella laughed a little at my statement but sobered up at the expression crossing my face. I was terrified I would end up completely forbidden from anything Bella, and that just wasn't an option for me at that point. I was so damn drawn to her and I needed to know what was causing that draw.

I couldn't believe myself when I admitted to what had been spinning in my head all day, but I also didn't want to deny myself the opportunity to follow those feelings. I didn't know what was prompting the chemistry between us, but I was desperate to find out.

"Okay, I'm a big girl, and my daddy doesn't need to approve of who I choose to spend my time with. Pick me up at five?" Bella's surge of confidence warmed my heart. She wanted to be around me regardless of what her father thought of me.

"Absolutely, make sure you wear something comfortable." I gave her my trademark smile that I knew she loved. I felt her try to pull her hand from mine, but I tightened my grip instead.

"Um… you have to let my hand go so I can leave." Bella's voice dripped with sarcasm as she continued to try and pull away from me. I gripped her hand and pulled her into me. My hands wrapped around her waist as I pulled her closer into me. I stared into her deep, soulful brown eyes for the longest time.

"Bella, I'm going to kiss you, and I really hope you're okay with that," I whispered to her as I leaned down and never broke our eye contact. I watched as her eyes fluttered closed and her entire body relaxed. My head descended closer to hers as I licked my lips in anticipation. I took a deep breath, and as my lips touched hers, I felt like I was shocked quite pleasantly. I started to press my lips harder when the squealing of tires caused both of us to jump apart.

"ISABELLA MARIE SWAN! I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR YOU ALL DAMN DAY!" a booming male voice screamed from the vehicle behind me. My eyes widened as I realized it was Chief Swan. I felt myself break out into a cold sweat and immediately dropped my hands from her waist.

"Fucking hell," Bella muttered before turning to face the direction his voice came from. I didn't dare move. I didn't want him to kill me for touching his daughter, and I knew he had his side arm handy.

"You scared the hell out of me, young lady! I was patrolling and saw the truck here so I sat and waited for you to come out of the store, but when you never came out, I started panicking! You nearly gave me a damn heart attack! Where in the hell have you been all damn day?" Chief Swan's voice was directly behind me, and I felt myself gulp in fear. He was so pissed off and Bella obviously hadn't told him she would be with me today.

"Dad, I told you I was going out today! I told you that I met someone at the store and that I was going to be hanging out with him! Why are you freaking out?" Bella's face was flaming red. I could read the anger in her eyes as she stared her father down. She reached down and took my hand causing my eyes to widen. She couldn't honestly expect me to turn around, could she?

"What's your name, son?" the chief asked me. My back stiffened as I stared at Bella trying to silently communicate that I needed her help. "I'm talking to you! What is your name?" he was getting more agitated as he waited. Bella rolled her eyes and dropped my hand before stepping up closer to her father.

"His name is Edward Cullen, and he…" Bella didn't get the chance to finish her statement before I was pinned back against my car.

"Why were your hands on my daughter? You little… Cullen, you better stay the hell away from my daughter!" He was so close to my face his spit was slapping at me. I flinched back at his searing brown eyes, vaguely noticing that they were the same shade as Bella's, and let my head hang down so I wasn't looking at him.

"I… she… we… Bella?" I stuttered out. I needed her help with this. That damn man made me nervous as hell, and I wasn't about to have him calling my damn parents again. I was already in the shit hole with my mom while my dad said that it was normal teenage boys stuff, but I knew another phone call from Chief Swan would be detrimental to my father's blasé attitude.

"Dad, lay off. He showed me around Forks today. He's been a perfect gentleman, and he already told me why you hate him. Personally, I think it's a little sad and pathetic, but whatever." Bella rolled her eyes again and tapped her foot at her father.

"Listen to me, Edward Cullen, this is my little girl, and I won't have you fooling around with her," he ground out in my face before releasing me. "You, Isabella, follow me home, and we'll discuss all this when we get there," he finished before stomping back to his police cruiser.

"I'm sorry Edward. I'll see you at five tomorrow though, right?" she asked me shyly. I felt my jaw drop open as I stared at her. I was dumbfounded. Hadn't her father just gotten done screaming at me for wanting to date her?

"Of course you will… as long as your dad isn't planning on killing me while I sleep tonight." I gave her a half smile as she giggled before climbing into her truck. I didn't get back into my car until both her truck and her father's cruiser was out of sight. I wasn't ready to head home and listen to Jasper and Rose go at it some more, so I headed over to the hospital to see if I could catch my dad. I really needed someone to talk to.

**BPOV**

I didn't think I could ever be more pissed off at Charlie than I was when he interrupted my kiss with Edward. My entire body was vibrating with the anticipation of his smooth, sweet lips gliding across mine. I felt my chest heaving, and my breath caught in my throat as I felt his flesh graze mine. Before my hands could grip onto his soft, silky hair, I was startled away from him by the squealing of tires.

I heard Charlie screaming at me and felt my heart sink as I watched the panic fill Edward's face. I hated that he and my father didn't get along, but I knew it didn't really matter to me. I craved Edward as if he was the last bit of oxygen I would ever get.

"Isabella! Certainly you can't be stupid enough to want anything to do with that boy!" my father cried out before I even had my truck door all the way open. Sometime on our way home, it had started raining so he was standing beside his cruiser dripping wet and fuming. I almost imagined that I could see steam rolling off his body.

"Dad, it's pouring down out here, so how about we go inside and then we can discuss all of this?" I sighed as I climbed out of my truck and rushed up toward the front door. I heard Charlie behind me, stomping up the porch steps and into the house behind me.

"Bella, that boy is trouble. He's no good, and I don't want you involved with someone like him. You're a good kid, and I'd hate to see him take you down with him." Charlie sighed as he hung up his coat and gun belt before removing his sodden boats.

"Again, I'm not having this argument. I'm a big girl, and I can most certainly handle Edward Cullen. I don't know what you want from me, but I like Edward and his friends. I would think that you'd be happy for me finding something to do with my time." I felt the aggravation in my voice and knew that Charlie wouldn't take my attitude for long.

"You are just as stubborn as your mother. Bella, I do want you to be happy here this summer, but I don't want you getting involved with that boy!" Charlie's face was starting to redden in his anger.

"Listen, Dad, I will promise you right now that I won't get involved in anything I shouldn't be involved in. I love you, and I honesty appreciate your opinion, but I don't think Edward is as bad as you make him see. He's polite, honest, and very sweet. I've made plans with him for tomorrow evening so I would appreciate it if you didn't cause a scene." I let out an aggravated sigh at having to explain myself. Charlie's eyes narrowed at me as he contemplated my statement.

"First off, how do you know he's been honest with you?" he questioned immediately. I rolled my eyes at him as I dropped dramatically onto the couch.

"He told me the second he knew you were my father that you hated him and it was because he was a trouble maker." I lulled my head toward him and tried to show him how bored I was by all these redundant questions.

"Alright, I'm giving him _one_ shot with this. If he even so much as breaths over that line, he's done. I won't have him and his hooligan friend corrupting my daughter." Charlie crossed his arms over his chest and took a seat in his recliner. I smirked at his defeat as I stood to wrap him in a small hug.

"Thank you, Daddy," I told him sweetly before pressing a gentle kiss to his temple. I left him to stew in his mood and walked up to my room pulling out my cell phone to text Edward on my way.

_Charlie said that you better not fuck this up,_ I messaged. I laughed as I pictured Edward's expression at those words.

_Guess that means no alcohol, weed, or sex, huh?_ He responded after a few minutes. I giggled while shaking my head at his response.

_Well, damn, just take out all the fun in it, why don't you?_ I sent back and got a quick response in turn.

_Don't worry, I'll make sure we have plenty to entertain ourselves. See you tomorrow at 5._ The last message was cryptic and had me crawling with curiosity. I spent a few hours reading and eventually fell asleep with my head buried in my book.

I woke up the next morning in an ecstatic mood. I was excited to spend some more time with Edward, and I was really hoping that all my intuitions about him the previous day were correct. I couldn't get those sparkling emerald green eyes out of my mind, and his crooked smile was enough to make my knees go weak. I thought about the silky smooth intonations of his voice as I stared at my ceiling and goose bumps littered my skin. I wanted to feel the full force of his kiss… it was like my body craved that connection.

I spent a little time on the phone with Alice telling her about Edward, Jasper, and Rosalie. She seemed enthusiastic about helping me to makeover Rosalie. I knew it was only because she felt like I was finally converting to her way of life, but I only wanted to help Rose because I felt like if she just had some confidence, then she could be a bombshell.

Alice told me that she wanted me to set up my webcam for her to see Rose and talk me through everything. She even said she was so excited that she was considering flying out for a weekend. I was secretly praying that she would because I missed our easy connection and I wanted her to meet Edward. Alice was always my sounding board and her opinion meant more to me than anyone else's ever had.

My next chore for the day was answering the twelve emails my mother had left me in the three days we had been apart. I wanted to be mad at her, but the only thing I managed to muster up was a vague annoyance at her persistence. The emails were all the same asking me how I was adjusting and if I was enjoying myself. They only got more desperate as she went on. I replied to her and told her to stop worrying about me and just enjoy her vacation.

After my emails were sent, I made my way downstairs, ate a light breakfast, and nervously cleaned the house. I was desperate for something to keep me busy until five. It felt like the second hand ticked backwards one minute for every two forwards.

**EPOV**

I had gone to the hospital, but my dad was busy. I sat around and waited for a short while, but when Bella let me know that she had talked her father down, I just wanted to get home and find a distraction until I could see her the next day.

I slept like shit that night, but it was to be expected. I wanted to do something she would enjoy but I also wanted to make it special. I had never actually taken a girl I liked out so I was ridiculously nervous. My mom tried to calm me down, but she only made my decisions about the evening harder. Upon seeing the day would be warm and dry, I decided that I would take Bella on a picnic, as cliché as it sounds. I really thought it out.

To me, it seemed like the perfect opportunity to get us alone and allow us to really talk. I wanted to know everything about her. My biggest curiosities were about her future aspirations. Really, I was dying to know what made her mind work. Her outlook on life seemed to be so positive, and she was so trusting of me.

Her innocence was incredibly attracting. She made me feel like I was on top of the world when she looked at me, and those huge, doe-like brown eyes sucked me in with their depthless invitation. It was like seeing straight into her soul but not having the code to read it. I had never felt the same jolts of emotion as I had when our eyes met in that grocery store. My entire body craved the connection she gave me.

I spent my morning day dreaming about the slight touch of her lips upon mine. I wondered how she would respond to an uninterrupted kiss. I imagined the moans and groans that would escape her mouth during a passionate embrace, and it damn near crippled me with lust. My goal for the day was to get at least one of those sounds from her lips.

I started getting myself ready around three just to have something to do. I wanted to call her and see if I could come early, but I didn't want to seem desperate or clingy. I waited to leave my house until four, and then proceeded to drive around down over and over again. I finally pulled into her drive-way around four forty-five. I just couldn't handle waiting any longer. I noticed that the Chief's car wasn't in the driveway, so my mood lifted instantly.

I walked calmly and comfortably to the house while taking in my surroundings. The house was small and a dull, fading shade of yellow. The shutters were white while the door itself was a dark oak. The contrast of colors felt quite homey, and I could completely picture Bella inside of it.

I raised my hand to knock, but the door swung open before my hand connected to the wood to reveal a grinning Bella. Her exuberance was contagious, and I felt the same goofy grin grace my face.

"I couldn't stand it anymore. I saw you pull in, and I've been antsy to see you all day. I hope you aren't upset about my dad last night," Bella spoke quickly and dropped her head in shame at the mention of her father's actions.

"I'm not upset at all. I've been driving around for almost an hour waiting to pick you up. I really missed you, as nutty as that makes me seem." I pulled her chin up as I spoke and met her eyes. She drew me in with those trusting and innocent eyes. I felt so hypnotized.

"You should have called me; I would have told you to come over at noon!" She giggled at her statement, and I could feel the nervousness drifting off her in waves. I grabbed her hand and squeezed it before pulling her in a tight hug.

"I didn't want to seem desperate or anything. Come on, let's go," I whispered in her ear before pulling her from the porch out to my car. I politely held the door open for her and kissed her hand before shutting it. I was going to play this evening up with Bella as much as I could. There was no harm in making myself look good.

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**Leave an author some love!**


	5. Inappropriate Misunderstandings

**AN: Sorry for the update delay. Real life and all that Jazz. Big thanks once again to twilight-is-lovee again for being a wonderful and supportive Beta!**

**Playlist:**_  
Summer Love_ – Justin Timberlake  
_Walking on Sunshine_ – Aly & AJ version  
_I'd Lie_ – Taylor Swift  
_Happy Together_ – Simple Plan  
_Hey Soul Sister_ – Train_  
Two Is Better Than One_ – Boys Like Girls ft Taylor Swift

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**EPOV**

I took Bella out for a normal pizzeria dinner, and we played miniature golf, and then blew thirty dollars in an arcade playing games just so Bella could get the giant teddy bear that I probably could have bought her for less. It was worth every penny I spent on her, though. We took the goofy pictures in the photo booth, squeezed into the go-karts while we raced and bumped into each other. Then we ate ice cream from a street vendor while we sat on a bench and laughed about the goofy things we had both done. The night was incredibly easy and more comfortable than anything I had ever done with another person.

As Bella and I were driving home, I couldn't help but smile. I knew I looked incredibly silly with my wide mouthed, toothy grin, but the moment I looked over at Bella, I realized she was trying to hide the same goofy expression on her face. That realization made my heart soar. I had known the girl for little more than 48 hours, and she had stolen my heart.

"I love that smile. The way your cheeks flush and your eyes crinkle up… it's absolutely beautiful," I whispered as I glanced at her and saw her blush deepen.

"You're such a sap, you know that?" Bella giggled as she smirked at me. I felt my smile grow as she continued looking at me. I could already feel the ache in my cheeks from the muscle's in my mouth working overtime.

"That would be the first time I have ever heard that comment. I don't usually have this kind of connection with… well, anyone," I admitted sheepishly.

"I feel so special! Thank you, though, you've been a complete gentleman tonight." Bella relaxed back into the chair and let her head roll to stare at me.

"Doesn't mean I've wanted to be." I wanted to disappear as I heard the mumbled words fall from my lips. I prayed she didn't catch on and hear what I had just said.

"What do you mean by that?" Her voice was quiet and I could hear the confusion in her tone. I took a quick look at her to see that her face was scrunched up with confusion and what I could only assume was concentration.

"I don't wanna freak you out or anything… I mean, we've only known each other for two days. I know I've expressed this already, but… damn it," I cursed as I let out a long, low sigh. "If I am truly being honest here, I'm wanted you since the second I laid eyes on you. Fuck, Bella," I growled out in aggravation. I was suffering from a perpetual hard on for two days, and I couldn't seem to concentrate without a distraction.

"What does that have to do with being a gentleman? You've been driving me nuts all damn night! I swear, every time I got the confidence to kiss you, you managed to keep out of my reach," Bella laughed nervously as I gawked at her. I felt the car slowing down as I stared.

"You were trying to kiss me? Are you being serious?" I was in complete shock. If I had known of her intentions, I definitely wouldn't have stayed out of her reach.

"Do you honestly think that I've never played miniature golf? Why else would a girl play that stupid? I wanted you next to me, but whenever I turned to look at you trying to position me the right way, you were backing up." She giggled, and I finally managed to pull my eyes from her face to continue our drive, though I wasn't driving as fast as I usually would.

"Honesty, I really thought you'd never played, and I backed off when you looked at me because I thought I might have been making you uncomfortable." I rubbed the back of my neck before looking back at her.

"Guys never get the hints." She rolled her eyes and squeezed her teddy bear before settling back into her seat.

"Yeah, well, girls could be a little more obvious and a little less cryptic about what they want from us." I gave her my crooked smirk and reveled in the blush I caught creeping up her face from my periphery.

"Is this obvious enough for you?" I heard her soft voice whispering after she took a deep breath. My brows crinkled in confusion before I felt her hand on my thigh. My entire body stiffened as a groan flew from my throat.

"Don't start something you don't plan to follow through with, Bella." My voice was shaky and weaker than I intended it to come out. I wanted to do things right with this girl. I truly liked her, and I didn't want her to be just a fuck.

"Who said I didn't intend to follow through?" she questioned me innocently as she squeezed my thigh tightly before removing her hand entirely.

"Fuck! You can't just do that to a guy!" The moan of pain that left my mouth was entirely embarrassing. I could even look at her from my periphery.

"Edward, do me a favor and pull over the car." The whispered words were shaky and barely perceptible. My voice stuck in my throat and my stomach clenched at the thought of what might happen in that situation. My first discernable thought was that I didn't have a condom while my second was that there was no way she was bold enough to make that comment after only two days of knowing me.

"I… uh… don't think… that's such a great idea." I swallowed hard and felt myself taking deep breaths.

"Why is it not a good idea? Do you not want to or something?" she asked and I could hear the belief that I was rejecting her in her voice.

"NO! Oh, God, Bella, I'm not rejecting you… I just don't want you to do something you'll regret!" I cried out in a panic. I saw the smile on Bella's face when I looked back at her.

"I wasn't planning on fucking you in your car in some dank parking lot. I just wanted you to pull over so we could talk more. I'm really not ready to go home. Not to mention the fact that your avoidance of touching me since yesterday has been bugging me." Bella shrugged, and I felt my on face flame red at my misinterpretation of her intentions. I couldn't look at her, and I refused to speak. My embarrassment spoke volumes.

The rest of the drive was silent. I didn't pull the car over because I felt like such a moron for thinking she wanted to sleep with me already. I really was in need of a good jack off session.

"Um… I'm sorry?" Bella suddenly spoke into the silence of the car, but her comment sounded more like a question.

**BPOV**

I couldn't have heard him correctly. There was no way he had just admitted to needing to jack off out loud to me. I felt my entire body flush at the words. I was trying so hard not to jump on him. My boldness had already come off the wrong way, and apparently, I had elicited a response that had Edward uncomfortable.

"Why are you apologizing?" he asked in confusion. I blushed even deeper at the thought of repeating his words to him.

"Um, I was asking you what you had just said because I could have sworn I heard…" I let my statement trail off before looking back at Edward.

"I didn't say anything." His words were laced with a deep confusion.

"Oh… it sounded like… well um… like you said you need to… um… jack off?" I mumbled quickly. Edward's face blanched as my words hit him.

"I did not just say that out loud," he groaned and let his head hit the steering wheel as he stopped at a light. I couldn't help but laugh at his reaction.

"You did actually…" I couldn't stop laughing at him, and he was soon laughing with me. All the awkwardness was gone from the car as he pulled up to my house.

I went to open my door but Edward stopped me before jumping out of the car and racing to open the door for me. I gave him a shy smile as he reached his hand down to help me out of the car. His returning smile was just as excited as mine. I was ridiculously happy that he had enjoyed the night as much as I had.

"I'm sorry for the… um… awkward conversations, but I had a great time with you tonight." Edward's voice was shy as he walked next to me up the porch steps with his hands buried in his pockets.

"Don't apologize. It was quite amusing actually." I smiled up at him as I grabbed one of his hands and pulled it from his pocket to squeeze it. His eyes flickered from my eyes to my lips several times before I saw him lick his lips, and an expression of determination came onto his face.

Everything felt like it was happening in slow motion as I watched Edward lean down into me. My breath caught in my throat and my eyes widened before I saw his eyes flutter closed. I took a deep breath and let my eyes close as I felt his hands encircle my waist. His body pressed against mine as his lips descended on mine. My body lit on fire as his smell surrounded me, and the moment his lips touched mine, my body betrayed me. My hands flew up to his hair, where they grabbed onto the soft, silky locks using them to pull his face closer into mine.

A low growl reverberated through the kiss as Edward's grip tightened on my hips. I felt him pulling my body flush against his, making his erection completely noticeable against my stomach. His tongue was suddenly tracing the outline of my top lip, and my mouth opened in a gasp, allowing his tongue the entrance it was seeking. My knees started to shake, and I felt like they were going to give out on me as his delectable tongue moved skillfully over mine. It was like tug-a-war between us. Neither one of us wanted to give up control. I felt myself getting dizzy, and it shocked me. I had never had this reaction to a kiss.

Edward's lips were suddenly free from mine, causing my eyes to fly open. When his stunningly beautiful green eyes met mine, I could read the pure desire in them, and this created a flush that spread over every inch of my body. It took me a few minutes to realize that Edward and I were gasping for air. No wonder I was dizzy… the guy made me forget that I needed to breath.

"Holy hell, that was the best fucking kiss I have ever experienced," he whispered breathlessly as he continued to hold onto my hips. I smiled shyly at him before looking down at the ground. I didn't know how to react to him after that embarrassing display of my minimal self control.

"Um… I… wow. Thank you." I cringed as the two words left my mouth. I really couldn't manage look at him after that pathetic comment.

"You're so damn adorable it's painful," Edward laughed out as he grabbed my chin to pull my face in his direction. His lips came down to mine again in a chaste kiss that he ended quickly with his crooked smirk in place as I pouted.

"You're a tease," I whined. Edward laughed before squeezing me tightly to his chest. I inhaled deeply before releasing a disgruntled sigh when he stepped back from me.

"I'm not a tease. I need to go home, though, or your Dad is going to be coming out with a shotgun. I'm not quite ready for that interaction. I'll call you tomorrow?" He grinned at me as he walked backward down the steps.

"You had better. I've got nothing else to do in this tiny ass town," I joked with him. He laughed one last time as he stumbled down the last step. His face flamed red before he turned and bolted to his car. I held my giggle in until he pulled away. I opened the front door and promptly slid down it as I let it fall closed. I knew that I was sporting the goofiest grin, but I couldn't find it in myself to really care.

I walked upstairs to my room and collapsed on my bed without even changing. I couldn't stop thinking about Edward, and even though he had just left, I missed him terribly. My chest ached with need. I grabbed my cell out of my back pocket and looked over at the silly teddy bear that we had managed to get with all of our game tickets. I shook my head with a small smile before looking down at my phone. I was prepared to text him when a new message alert was blinking on the screen. My smile was a hundred watts as I flipped it open to see if it was from him, but my heart sank when reality crashed back down on my head as my mother's name blinked on the screen.

How could I have forgotten that I didn't live in Forks? I couldn't create a real relationship with Edward when I lived in Phoenix! My heart pounded painfully against my chest, and my lungs felt like I couldn't pull in enough air as the room spun. I was sprinting head first into heartbreak, and the brakes weren't working. What the hell was I supposed to do?

**EPOV**

I was on an emotional high as I sped home from Bella's. It took every ounce of control I had to pull away from that kiss. My cock ached just at the thought of her soft hips under my hands. I groaned for the millionth time and tried to push the sexual frustration I felt out the window. I missed her already. Was it possible to fall in love with someone in two days' time? I didn't know if it was, but it sure felt like that was where I was headed.

My chest ached and my eyes burned at the thought that she was leaving in eight weeks. She couldn't go. There was no way that I could let her go like that. Bella had fully consumed my world, and I didn't think I could deal with it if she left. My heart stopped as I pulled into the garage of my house. I shook my head to rid it of the thoughts that were suddenly permeating my brain. I couldn't allow those thought to root in and destroy everything before it even started.

I climbed to stairs numbly to my room as I prayed that my thoughts would silence. I was having the best night of my young life before my cynical side kicked in. _She'll never truly be mine. She lives in Arizona. How would that ever work? Was this just a summer fling to her? _

"Dude, did your date suck or something? You look like someone just kicked your fucking puppy," Jasper's voice came from the middle of my bed. I jumped back at the sound but quickly composed myself before kicking off my shoes.

"My date was fucking perfect and that's the damn problem. How could you let me get involved like this? She's leaving in less than eight weeks Jazz! I… it's like… I feel like I've known her forever, and she's just fucking perfect for me. I think…. God, this is going to sound so fucking stupid, but dude… I think I'm in love with her," I mumbled the last part as I crumpled into the couch across from my bed. I heard the bed shift as Jasper moved, and I sucked in a deep breath when I heard him sigh.

"You can't be in love with her. It's that simple, Edward. You've only known each other for a matter of days." Jasper's voice was very nonchalant, and it pissed me off that he had the audacity to dismiss my feelings so quickly.

"Fuck you, dude. Haven't you ever heard that damn saying? It takes an hour to like someone, a day to love someone, but a lifetime to forget someone or some shit like that? You just don't understand… just thinking about her leaving is painful. I literally feel like someone punched me in the gut. It just… it's fucking painful!" I cried out pathetically. I looked up at Jasper and read the sympathy and confusion in his eyes.

"Wow… that is… intense? I never thought I'd see you like this, Cullen," Jasper's voice was awed as he spoke, but I didn't want his praise, or his pity for that matter.

"Just tell me how to make this shit fucking work for me!" I begged him ridiculously.

"Listen, you have the summer to be with her. You need to take advantage of all the time you have and tell Bella what you're thinking. Dude, if you really do love her then you two can make a long distance thing work. It's not like you aren't loaded and your mom will let you fly out to see her, and I guarantee that she can come out and visit her Dad for holidays. You're freaking out way too damn early." Jasper shrugged his shoulders as if it was all obvious and I was missing it waving and screaming at me. I paused to ponder his statement and let it sink in.

Jasper was completely right. There was no reason to freak out yet. Bella and I could discuss this if things continued to progress, and I should just cherish the time I had to spend with her. When the hell did I become such a fucking sap?

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**Please leave me a review and let me know what you think. **


	6. Freak the Freak Out

**AN: Thought a 2-for-1 deal would help make up in my lack of postage! Thanks to the best beta EVER twilight-is-lovee!**

**Playlist:**_  
The Great Escape_ - Boys Like Girls  
_Your Love Is My Drug_ - KE$HA  
_Our Time Now_ – Plain White T's  
_Let Me Love You_ - Mario  
_Come On Get Higher_ – Matt Nathanson  
_Untouched _- The Veronicas

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**BPOV**

After my mental freak out, I called Alice, and she reassured me that everything happens for a reason and that I should have a little bit of faith. I thought about her words of encouragement, and I was eternally grateful that she had decided she needed to come up and meet the guy who had suddenly stolen my heart.

Alice had always been my sounding board. She was there to tell me I was a moron when I needed her to, and she was always there to guide me into better decisions when I needed a push. I was excited for her help with Rosalie, too. I knew Alice loved knew projects, and Rosalie was perfect. I was never one for a makeover session, but the lack of confidence that poor Rose radiated was downright depressing, and it was definitely a bonus that for once, I wasn't the subject in Alice's tirade.

Edward and I had hung out a lot for the first two weeks. Charlie promised me he'd have the weekend off so that we could spend some time together, but now I was bored and irritated with my irrational father. He promised me that he would have two weeks of vacation, but apparently, that wasn't going to be happening with him still in town. I wanted to redecorate my room just so that I had something to do, but I couldn't move the bed or desk by myself. I was actually hoping that Edward would want to help me, but I thought better of that decision because I definitely couldn't have him walk into that childish bedroom.

I hadn't heard from Edward yet that morning, and I was antsy. I just wanted to get out of the house and do something to take my mind off my absentee father. When Edward did call, he apologized profusely for sleeping in so late and explained that Jasper was at his house and they had been goofing off late. I tried to tell him it was fine and I wasn't upset because truly, I couldn't be upset with him. We made plans to hang out at his house for the afternoon, and he promised to teach me how to play pool.

Jasper and Rosalie were at his house when I walked down to the basement. Both of them greeted me with a wave while they temporarily paused whatever argument was raging between them for the moment. Edward pulled me into a tight hug as he placed a gentle, leading kiss on my lips. I sighed in contentment as our lips moved together expertly.

I heard a loud crash and feet stomping out of the room, causing me to pull away from Edward. I heard him swear under his breath before we both looked over in time to catch Rosalie storming up the stairs.

"I don't mean to be rude, but could you tone down the PDA around Rose? She may like you some Bella, but honestly… she's still pissed off about the whole situation with you and Edward." Jasper's voice was sheepish as he shrugged and followed after his sister.

"Damn, I sure can clear a room can't I?" I joked lightly as Edward squeezed me against his chest.

"It's not your fault, Bella. I should have been a little more respectful of her feelings. I'm going to go apologize to her." Edward sighed as he dropped his arms from around me, but I grabbed his arm to stop him.

"Look, you can't go apologizing to her for this. She's a big girl and she really needs to come to terms with the fact that you just don't have feelings for her beyond friendship. If you go running out there right now and tell her that you were wrong to kiss me in front of her, you're just going to blur the lines more for her," I explained to him. I could see the way Rosalie's mind worked, and I knew that she just needed a reason to hold on to the belief that Edward would come around for her, and in turn, Edward needed to avoid fueling that belief. Rosalie needed to move on.

"You're probably right. You're a damn genius, you know that?" He smiled down at me before kissing my forehead tenderly. He pulled me over to the 'chair & ½' they had in the basement. I curled up on his lap as we waited for the storm that was Rosalie to come back with Jasper.

It took about twenty minutes of Edward and I giggling about the most ridiculous topics known to man for Jasper and Rosalie to make their way back into the basement.

"Seriously! Haven't you ever wondered why they say green is green? It's a totally philosophical argument. Why is the grass called green instead of blue? Who came up with the names of the colors? What would it be like if blue was really green and green was really blue?" My voice was filled with laughter and seriousness. Edward just stared at me while he shook his head.

"Who would come up with that kind of question? Really, Bella, what the hell made you think about all this?" he asked me while he tried to hide his laughter.

"She's right, Edward, it's a completely philosophical argument. It's one of those things you'll never know the answer to. It's just like asking how language was created. If you think about it, we were taught language, but cavemen didn't talk, so what was the first language system? You aren't very deep are you?" Rosalie rolled her eyes as she plopped down onto the couch.

"Now, now, Rosie, don't insult Edward for his lack of reading outside of the box." Jasper smiled and nodded in greeting as he sat down next to his sister.

"I just don't understand why you question it if you won't ever get the answer you're looking for. What's the point?" Edward gripped my hips as I tried to move myself off of his lap. I didn't even need to see Rosalie to feel her glare burning into me. We had given her enough of a show already, and even though I though she needed to move on, I didn't want to shove my… well whatever you would call what Edward and I had… in her face.

"The point is curiosity. Haven't you ever wondered about things outside of yourself?" Rosalie scoffed as she spoke, and I stifled a laugh as Jasper rolled his eyes and mocked her.

"Where are you trying to go?" Edward whispered into my ear as I tried to shift off his lap again.

"Enough with the philosophical bullshit! Let's play some pool!" Jasper called out and then jumped up from the couch. I saw the irritation flash in his eyes and felt the flush in my cheeks as Edward kissed my neck.

"Stop it, I don't want to make Rose uncomfortable," I whispered back as I pushed off him and stood up. Edward let out a heavy, dramatic sigh before dragging himself out of the chair.

"They're leaving before you do," Edward growled out as he walked past me. I shot Rosalie an apologetic glance as she stood up.

"Don't… It's not your fault he doesn't want me. I'm really trying here, and I'm sorry if I'm making you uncomfortable," she mumbled and walked past me, but I reached out to grip her arm. I couldn't just let her feel like that.

"Rose, my friend Alice is going to come out next weekend, and I would really like for you to come hang out with us. We'll do your makeover," I offered her with a small smile. She looked up at me in awe before a slow smile broke out on her face.

"You know, I've never had any girlfriends. I guess I'm kind of intimidating and people kind of avoid people like me." Rosalie's voice was sad and distant as she looked down at her feet.

"I'll be the first to admit that you are intimidating, but they aren't friends worth having if they aren't willing to look deeper than the surface." I squeezed her wrist gently and pulled her back towards the pool table where Edward and Jasper were racking the balls.

**EPOV**

Kissing Bella was fantastic, but holding her like she was mine was pure perfection. Her warm body fit so perfectly against mine. It was like two puzzle pieces that only have one flush match. I felt bad for flaunting my feelings for Bella in front of Rosalie, but I just couldn't help myself around Bella.

I couldn't wait for Jasper and Rose to head home so that I could have some alone time with Bella. I wanted to force the afternoon along so that they would leave, but I knew Bella wouldn't have that so I waited patiently while Rose threw her fit. I waited patiently while Bella sat in my lap, constantly readjusting herself, causing a painful erection that I was desperate to hide from her.

"Come on, ladies; let's get this show on the road!" I called out to Bella and Rosalie, who were standing by the couch talking. Bella held out her hand to me and continued her conversation with Rose.

"Girl has some spunk. I can't believe that Rose hasn't knocked her out yet… Actually, I'm surprised that Rose hasn't knocked _you_ out yet." Jasper grinned at me as he sized up his pool cue.

"Yeah, well, Rose knows how I feel about her. She's always been just my friend and nothing more. Bella is great though." I grinned back and waggled my eyebrows suggestively as Jasper scoffed.

"If she's gotten to you this much already, what are you going to do when she has to go home? I mean I know you were freaking about it a little while ago, but I just didn't get it until I saw you two together." The concern lacing his voice confused and worried me. Jasper usually didn't let things make him worry. He was always so confident that everything would turn out well.

"Honestly, I don't really know. I'm certainly worried about it. I guess Bella and I will really need to discuss it, but I think for now, we're just going to go with it. If you seriously think about it, we haven't known each other long at all. Hell, Jazz, we're not even official or anything." I looked back toward the couch and saw that Bella and Rose were headed our way so I unleashed my most charming smile at Bella.

"You do know that smile is lethal, right? You should really watch where you aim that thing," Jasper joked as he watched Bella's face flush a deep red.

"What are the teams? What are we playing, and what are the stakes?" Rosalie questioned as she grabbed her usual cue.

"Well, it's a little unfair but it's going to be you and Jazz against me and Bella. I'm going to teach her how to play." I smiled a little and winked at Bella while she played around with a few cues before Jasper handed her one of the appropriate height.

"So, Bella, you're new at pool?" Jasper's face lit up, and I heard the groan escape my mouth before I consciously knew I wanted to make any noise.

"Yes I'm new at it. What's the groan all about?" Bella's questioning and suspicious gaze fell on me for an answer. I didn't really want to explain Jasper's odd ball ritual for 1st time pool players.

"Well… we have this… tradition." His wicked smirk came out, and I heard Rosalie coughing to try to hide her giggles. "Every game has its stakes, and the first timer has to kiss every one of my toes if they lose. The best part though is the fact that I dip them in vinegar first," his grin was malicious.

"Sounds fair, but if I win, I want an open agreement for one thing… whatever my choosing that you have to do." Bella's wicked smile in return to Jasper's challenge was unnerving. Was she actually agreeing to Jasper's conditions? She couldn't possibly think we could win.

"Excellent. I'll go for that because there is absolutely no way you two are going to beat us." The smugness that surrounded Jasper was almost palpable.

"Alright, so it's the usual for us then, Edward?" Rosalie's voice was sickly sweet, and it made my stomach curl. I had never lost to Rosalie because she always made her stakes a kiss, and that just wasn't happening.

"Not on your life, Rosie. I'll put down twenty bucks if we lose, and you'll put down twenty bucks if you two lose." I gave her a pointed stare that she shrugged off.

"We'll let you two break. Good luck." Jasper snickered as he pulled the rack from the balls.

"Bella, are you right handed?" I questioned and waited for her to confirm before moving on. "Okay, you put your right hand back here. The further back you hold the cue, the more control you're going to have over your force and speed." I placed her right hand before pressing myself shamelessly against her back and wrapping my arms around her to position her left hand on the felt of the table. "Alright, now you make a 'C' with your pointer and thumb. Slide the tip of the cue between your pointer and middle finger," I instructed her.

"Like this?" Bella asked as she peeked at me over her shoulder. I stifled a groan as I pulled my hips away from her to conceal my hard on.

"Perfect, now let the cue rest on your middle finger and thumb while you use the pointer finger to grip the cue loosely so that you can slide it." I clenched my teeth at my own words before taking a deep breath.

"So, just like this right?" she asked again as she moved the cue between her fingers slowly. I had never wanted to jump a girl more in my life then in those few seconds. She looked at me from over her shoulder, and her face was so innocent that the fantasies went wild in my head of hoisting her onto the pool table.

"Umm… yeah. Now you want to hit right in the center of the cue ball and you want to hit hard to break, okay?" I instructed before I backed away. Her smell was intoxicating and extremely distracting. I knew that I would have jumped her in a matter of moments if I didn't get away from her and get some breathing space.

"Well, here goes nothing," Bella bent over the table and her face scrunched up in concentration. It was completely adorable. I just felt bad that she would end up being subjected to Jasper's feet.

I watched as Bella took aim with perfect form, and I was impressed. She pulled back on the cue and smacked the cue ball causing the other balls to scatter around the table before three sunk in. My mouth flopped open as I watched her straighten up and turn to me.

"That was good, right?" she asked sheepishly. I narrowed my eyes at her, but she shrugged and gave me an innocent smile before turning back to Jasper and Rosalie.

"How the fuck did you just do that?" Jasper's voice was full of awe, and I caught the eye roll of Rosalie before it really clicked.

"Beginner's luck?" Bella smiled and let a small giggle out as she answered. I grinned back at her before shaking my head.

"Okay, lady luck, stripes or solids?" I asked her. She looked into the pockets and analyzed the choice before peaking at the table.

"We'll take solids." Her statement was still full of innocence as she lined up her second shot and sunk two solids. Jasper's jaw came unhinged as he watched Bella round the table in only a few minutes sinking every solid without even touching a stripe before taking out the eight-ball.

"How the fuck did you just do that?" Jasper cried out with the same awe in his voice. Bella shrugged and twirled the cue in her hand.

"About a year ago my mom got into billiards and made me and my best friend, Alice, take some classes with her. It's really all about geometry." Her voice was matter-of-fact as she shrugged.

"I knew she was playing our asses the second she picked up that cue. She weighted the thing without either of you catching it." Rosalie shook her head before collecting the balls and racking them again.

The rest of the afternoon, we all took turns teaming up and just playing against Bella. None of us were able to beat her, and by the end of three hours, each of us owed her an undisclosed debt. I wasn't really worried about mine, but I could see the wheels turning in her head as she worked out the debts for Rosalie and Jasper.

"Okay, time's up. You've got to claim your prizes now," Jasper stated as he plopped down on a barstool.

"What I really want is just for you two to go home." Bella's face flushed a crimson red as she looked to the floor. I felt my heart beat pounding in my chest as I looked at her. Jasper's eyes widened in understanding while Rosalie snorted at Bella's statement.

"Alright, guys, you heard her. She did win the first game and all. So… see you guys later," I mumbled out excitedly as I tried to contain the smile that wanted to burst through. I saw Jasper roll his eyes before he turned to walk out. Rosalie stood stone still with her arms crossed over her chest.

"I'm not going anywhere yet. I never made a bet with her." Her voice was like ice. She stared me down through her glasses. I stared straight back.

"Come on, Rose. This is ridiculous," Jasper spoke from the stairs. Rosalie's shoulders stiffened, and I could feel the waves of anger rolling off her.

"You know what's ridiculous? He's known her for two fucking weeks! He's known me for ten fucking years, and he's never even considered anything with me! Is it because she's leaving in a few weeks so there are no complications?" Her icy voice and pissy attitude toward Bella caused my temper to flare.

"What's different? She's not a cold hearted bitch who can't take no for an answer!" I cried out in anger as I took a step toward her. Bella stepped in front of me and placed a hand on my chest.

"Listen, Rose, I like you, but I won't deal with this shit. It's been two weeks now, and we've been nice about all of this, including your feelings, but really, you need back off. He doesn't like you that way. Get over yourself. Edward is asking you to leave his house, and you have no right to say no to that request. I hope you still come over next weekend." Bella's voice was calm and even. She was always the voice of reason in our little group since I smacked into her at the grocery store. I wrapped my arms around her and buried my head in her hair.

I heard the huff and stomping of Rose leaving the basement, and I took a deep breath to calm my nerves before turning Bella in my arms to face me.

"Thank you for that. I don't know why I still put up with her shit. I mean, it's been this way for years," I sighed.

**BPOV**

"Edward, you put up with it because Jasper is your best friend, and when Rose isn't being a soul-sucking bitch, she's pretty damn cool. She doesn't scare me because her attitude is a defense mechanism. If she pushes everyone away, then nobody can get close enough to hurt her. She has this infatuation with you because you're the only male in her life that she isn't related to. Just wait, I have a big surprise for her next weekend." I grinned up at Edward before pulling him down and placing a leading kiss on his lips. He groaned against my mouth before lifting me off my feet and walking us back to the couch.

"I hope whatever you have planned fixes her shit. You do know that I'm not with you just because you're leaving, right? I really do care about you." He sighed back as he squeezed me tighter to his chest.

"Of course I know that. I hope you aren't mad that I wanted them to leave. I just wanted some time alone with you." I could feel the heat in my cheeks as I spoke. I wasn't about to tell him that his kisses made me crave his touch or that his sexy voice caused my body to rebel against my mind.

"Bella, you can find ways to get us alone whenever the hell you deem necessary, and I guarantee you that I will not get mad about it," he whispered in my ear before he pulled my earlobe into his mouth and bit down on it gently, causing me to squeal loudly.

"Holy shit, that tickles!" I cried out in laughter as I pulled out of his arms and climbed over to straddle his lap. A sexy groan of frustration fell from his lips while his head lulled back and his hips thrust up into me.

"God damn it Bella, this is so fucking unfair of you. I swear… if you leave me with blue balls again…" His words came out soft and breathy, although I was sure he meant for them to be harsh and warning.

"What will you do to me?" I whispered wickedly into his ear letting my hot breath fan his ear and neck. I relished in the shiver that wracked his body and the way his hands tightened on my hips. After two weeks of heavy making out and very little touching, I was dying to have some kind of release. My entire body ached with the need to just be touched as well as to touch him.

I was suddenly on my back with Edward hovering over me, his mouth centimeters from my own. I could smell and taste his sweet breath as he exhaled, and it caused me to squeeze my legs together.

"Don't start something you have no intentions of finishing, Isabella," he growled down at me before his lips crashed down onto mine. My hand flew to his hair as my brain screamed at my hands to pull him away while my body tugged him closer. I knew that two weeks was logically not long enough to be in a relationship and start having sex, but at that moment, I couldn't find a reason at all to stop the path we were running head first down.

"Who said I didn't intend to finish?" I gasped out when our mouths parted. I was rewarded with the sexiest crooked smirk and sparkling green eyes filled with lust. I grabbed his face in my hands and pressed a chaste kiss to his lips as his hands met the hem of my shirt. He hesitated with his eyes locked on mine.

"Are you sure? I mean we don't have to have sex… I just… I'm desperate for something. You make me crazy," Edward breathed across my face. I was left in a haze from my own lust and felt myself nod. His warm hands met the skin of my waist and roamed over my stomach with feather light touches. I tugged at his hair as he sent shivers over my body with the innocent caresses that felt ridiculously erotic.

I slid my hands down his back, gripped the hem of his shirt in my hands, and began tugging on it. He leaned up and away so that I could easily pull his shirt over his head. I fought back my groan as my fingers trailed over his solid shoulders, down his hard, muscled chest, and traced along his chiseled abdomen. I felt the wetness between my legs, and my hands shook as I felt his abs contract below them.

"Fuck Bella, you've gotta… stop," he stuttered out as my fingers grazed the waist of his low slung jeans. I felt the soft hair of his happy trail as I moved back up his abdomen to his chest. Edward's hands tightened around my hips as he looked down at me. I smiled up at him, and he shook his head before pulling me up to a sitting position.

"I don't want to stop," I whispered as I looked down at his hands. They were tugging on my shirt. He smirked at me as the fabric covered my face. I self-consciously covered my chest with my arms and Edward sighed.

"You don't need to hide from me." He gripped my wrists and tugged them away as he leaned in to kiss me. His hands immediately rubbed up and down my back as I wrapped my arms around his neck. He laid us back down and proceeded to trail gentle, sweet kisses down my neck to my collarbones. I felt his tongue swirl in the dip there before he kissed across the swell of my covered breasts.

"I… um…" I started to speak, but I was cut off by the feel of Edward's hand rubbing over my jeans against my pussy. I gasped at the contact, but he wasn't deterred. I had never had someone pay so much attention to me. His lips traveled over my skin as if memorizing every inch of me.

"Shh… just go with me on this Bella," he whimpered out against my skin before his other hand gripped my wrist and moved my hand to the bulge in his jeans. I could feel how hard he was and how big he was. It scared me momentarily, but I swallowed that feeling and began rubbing my hand against him slowly. He hummed into my skin before his hips ground into my hand.

The rest of our clothing stayed intact, but we worked each other up to ridiculous heights. I was panting and whimpering as Edward's hand finally slid down my stomach and into my jeans. His fingers came into contact with my clit, and I cried out. He immediately buried two fingers in me. I felt the familiar tightening in my stomach as his fingers curled up against me. I bit down on his shoulder to hold in my scream as I exploded around his fingers.

"God, that was the hottest fucking thing I've ever seen. I could listen to you scream my name for hours, Bella," he whispered into my ear as his hips bucked against me. I was relaxed and my muscles felt like Jell-O, but I slid my hand down the front of his pants and gripped his shaft tightly in my hand.

"If you can do all that with just your hands, I can't wait to see what you can do with everything else." I smiled against his mouth as he groaned. I picked up my pace until I felt him twitching in my hand. I could feel his release coming so I molded my mouth to his and caught his cries of pleasure as he released into my hand. His chest moved against me as he took in deep breaths.

"Thank… you… so fucking… much," Edward panted out between chaste kisses. I grinned up at him as he caught his breath. I started to open my mouth to respond, but the sound of heels clicking on the tiles stopped me in my tracks. Edward's eyes widened in realization as he bolted up right and tossed me my shirt. I pulled it on quickly before trying to tame my hair. Edward pulled on his shirt quickly and just as he was pulling me into his chest and reclining back, his mother's voice filled the room.

"Oh, there you two are. I was going to order Chinese for dinner because I am honestly in no mood to cook. What would you two like?" Esme smiled at us as she rounded the couch.

"I'll eat anything right now, Mom. I've certainly worked up an appetite today." Edward chuckled as I felt my face flame red. Esme didn't catch his innuendo though.

"What about you, Bella? Do you like Chinese?" she questioned with a pleasant smile on her face.

"Um… yeah… but I have to cook for Charlie tonight, otherwise he won't eat." I smiled back and prayed that my lame excuse would get me out of staying for dinner. I was mortified that Esme had almost caught us.

"Nonsense! I'll call your father and invite him over as well. How does sweet and sour chicken sound to you?" Esme called out as she walked toward the stairs.

"Sounds great. Charlie likes sesame chicken," I called back in defeat. When I looked back at Edward, my face crinkled in confusion. "What's the matter?"

"Did my mother just invite your father to dinner?" His voice was meek as he looked straight ahead. I suddenly realized the predicament we were in, and I couldn't stop the giggle that escaped my mouth.

"Yup, she most certainly did," I confirmed with a loud laugh.

* * *

**Leave a girl some love for her hardwork, imagination and dedication!**


	7. Bad Chemistry

**AN: Yeah... so I kinda stopped posting this for... like ever. I had some real life stuff going on and fanfiction fell to the wayside. Anyway, thanks to the ever awesome twilight-is-lovee for being my beta. Enjoy**

**Playlist:**  
_I Think I'm Paranoid_ by Garbage_  
Because Of You _by Ne-Yo  
_Cooler Than Me _by Mike Posner_  
If I Had You_ by Adam Lambert  
_It Wasn't Me _by Shaggy

* * *

**EPOV**

My mother hated me. I came to that conclusion the second she invited Chief Swan to dinner knowing full well that he disliked me before I was dating his daughter and now probably wanted to kill me. I had just had the hottest make out session of my life with his daughter and desperately needed to change my pants, but the memory was completely tainted by the fact that her father was on his way over and I actually had to sit through a meal with him.

"Would you relax? I won't let him shoot you." Bella snickered at what she thought was a hilarious joke, and I scowled at her.

"You can joke about that shit all you want, Bella, but he seriously hates me. He can see right through a lie. He'd cut my dick off if he knew what we just did!" I whined into her hair. Bella laughed and pulled away from me.

"Go change your pants while I clean myself up. I'll hold your hand through the entire dinner. Charlie really isn't as bad as you make him out to be. He's lightening up on the idea of you and me together." She smiled as she turned to walk to the bathroom. I groaned out loud at the sight of her ass swaying with her walk.

We managed to keep our hands to ourselves and watched a movie while we waited for the dinner from hell to descend upon us. I was fidgety and nervous the entire time. Every little sound made me jump ten feet in the air, which only served to irritate Bella. I eventually moved to the other side of the couch and tossed her an apologetic glance when she pouted at me.

"I'm sorry, Bella; I just don't want to piss your dad off. Him coming down to get you for dinner and seeing you all wrapped up in my arms wouldn't be the best was to welcome him into my house," I pleaded with her to understand, and she just rolled her eyes and stretched out on the couch to finish the movie.

"You are quite pathetic, Edward." Her voice was laced with annoyance as she made her statement.

We had finished our movie just as my mom called down the stairs to let us know that dinner had arrived along with Charlie. My entire body stiffened as Bella stood up and stretched her long, lean body like a cat. I let a small whimper escape, and she turned to me with a smirk.

"Come on, Cullen, it's time to turn on the charm." She grinned like the Cheshire cat with her hand reached out to pull me to my feet. I sighed in defeat and gripped her hand in mine before rising to my feet.

"I guess it was gonna have to happen sooner or later," I mumbled as we made our way to the stairs hand in hand. Just before I opened the basement door to the main hall, I felt Bella lean into me, and her hot breath blew over my neck and ear, causing goose bumps to form over the exposed skin.

"I'll make this worth your time tomorrow if you play nice," she whispered before pulling my earlobe into her mouth and sucking on it for a moment. She released it with a loud pop before yanking open the door and dropping my hand to walk into the formal dining room.

I stood there gaping like a moron as she pranced away. I was painfully hard again from that move, and I knew that I couldn't possibly make it through dinner like that. She was evil.

"There you are, Bells. I'm glad Esme invited me over. It's nice to spend some time away from the house," Charlie's gruff voice floated from the dining room, immediately deflating my hard on. I gulped nervously and shifted my feet on the floor, trying to bring up my courage to walk into that room.

I didn't want to see the disgust on Charlie's face when I sat down next to Bella. I didn't want to hear him sigh or see him roll his eyes at us. I knew that he didn't approve, and I wasn't ready to face that reality. Bella and I were happy in our little bubble.

"Where's Edward?" Carlisle asked, and I cringed. I knew that I had to go in there and face Chief Swan. I didn't want to disappoint Bella. I was so damn torn.

"He went to the bathroom. He'll be in here any minute," Bella's sweet voice saved me for a moment. I peeked into the room and saw her smiling and talking comfortably with my parents and her father. I was amazed at how quickly she became comfortable in my house. She was so shy in the beginning.

"Good evening, Chief Swan," I mumbled as I took the few necessary steps into the dining room to announce myself. I couldn't stand in the hallway all night.

"Edward," he greeted me with a tightlipped smile. I could practically read the thoughts screaming from him. He was thinking that it would all be over when Bella went back to Phoenix. He seemed to being putting up with it for her.

"Bella said that you like sesame chicken?" Esme broke the tension, and I crossed the room to take a seat next to Bella. Charlie's eyes narrowed as he watched me. I gulped again nervously and smiled at Bella.

"Yes, Esme, thank you. It was sweet of you to invite me over for dinner. It's nice that Bella is getting a break from cooking for her old man. She doesn't understand the concept of 'vacation,'" Charlie gave Esme a real smile, and I felt myself sink back into my chair. I knew what he was doing. He wanted me to know this wasn't a permanent arrangement.

"I just know that she and Edward are practically inseparable, so I figured we could all enjoy an evening together that way we wouldn't need to tear them apart so soon." Esme grinned at Bella and me as she spoke. I saw Bella blush and look away before Charlie cleared his throat.

"So, anything interesting happening in the Forks PD lately?" Carlisle asked as he plated up some food and passed the containers down the table.

Charlie and Carlisle exchanged gruesome stories about car accidents and surgeries that either of them had experienced. They already had a working relationship due to Carlisle being the only surgeon within a 50-mile radius and Charlie being the police chief, but I hadn't expected them to get along so well.

I tried to keep to myself and avoid all conversation with Charlie. I didn't want to give him any more reason to hate me than he already did. I kept my eyes down on my plate and my hands to myself even though Bella kept trying to grab my hand under the table.

"Edward, Chief Swan asked you a question dear." Esme looked at me worriedly as I lifted my head with a look of confusion. I thought that he and my dad were still exchanging stories; I had no idea he was talking to me.

"Um… I'm sorry, sir, I didn't hear you. Can you repeat the question?" I asked quietly. I heard Bella giggling at me under her breath. I gave her a sideways glance, and she tried to stifle it before I turned back to her father.

"I asked you what your plans are after graduation this spring. I know Carlisle here has his heart set on you going to medical school." He let out a forced smile as he looked at me. I gulped and turned back to my plate. I hated this question. I was currently undecided on what I wanted to do with my life.

"I'm… well, to be honest, sir, I don't know yet," I sputtered out nervously. I looked back up to see Carlisle's face staring back at me in shock. I hadn't told my parents that I didn't know if I was sure about medical school.

"You what? I thought… you said that… what happened to Stanford?" Carlisle choked out. Esme stood up and walked quickly to his side.

"Can we talk about this later?" I questioned without looking at either of them. I felt the sweat on the back of my neck and Bella's hand was suddenly gripping my thigh tightly.

"Don't worry, Edward, you have some time left, but I wouldn't wait too long to make that important decision. It really does determine the rest of your life." Charlie smirked at me, and I wanted to jump across the table and smack the smug look off of his face. "Thank you for dinner, Esme, Carlisle. It was wonderful. I hope to spend some time with you again soon. Bella, I expect you home in an hour," he stated as he stood and began to walk from the room. My parents both stood and followed him out, and I finally released my breath as I collapsed against my chair.

"I'm so sorry about that, Edward," Bella sighed as her arms wrapped around my shoulders from behind.

**BPOV**

"It's not your fault. I wasn't prepared. I just don't know if I want to go to medical school. I've been looking into a lot of things. I love science and everything, but I just want to be… me. I want to be Edward Cullen. I don't want to be known as Carlisle Cullen's son. This is about identity to me. I just hope they understand," Edward sighed to me. I smiled at him and pressed a kiss to his temple.

"Your parents are great people. I'm sure that as long as you are happy, they will be proud of you," I tried to sooth him but the sarcastic eye roll and grunt he gave me let me know that I was way off base.

"Yeah, in a perfect world that would be so. My dad nearly had a heart attack when I told him I didn't know what I wanted to do." Edward stood up and wrapped his arms around my waist. I ran my fingers gently through his hair.

"He was just shocked, that's all," I tried again, but he shook his head, effectively ending the conversation.

My father's opinion of Edward didn't change much over the summer; in fact, the more time I spent with Edward, the more he hated him. He loved Rose though. When Alice came over for a week she brought her brother Emmett along, and Rosalie said it was love at first sight. I swear her jaw dropped to the floor when Alice's teddy bear of a brother knocked on my bedroom door while Rose's hair was in curlers, her face covered in a green mask and cotton balls between her toes.

"What the hell, Bella! That's so cruel! Why didn't you tell me he was fucking hot?" Rosalie screeched at me. I grinned at her as Alice faked a gag.

"That's my brother… ewww." She played it up with a fake shiver and went back to painting Rose's toenails.

"I thought you had a thing for Edward. Didn't think you'd be interested, honestly," I replied as I tried to hide my smile from her. Rosalie's eyes narrowed before she spoke.

"Edward is dog shit compared to that hunk of man out there. I swear to you Bella, I will make him mine before this week is out." Her voice was calculating, and her whole face scrunched up as she contemplated.

"Damn it, Rose, do you want to start over? Stop moving your face and quit talking before the mask dries!" Alice chastised her. I took my place on the bed and giggled at the scene before me.

Alice and Rosalie got along great, just like I knew they would. The makeover for Rose went better than I had planned. Alice took her shopping and bought her an entire new wardrobe along with getting her hair styled professionally. The basic blond hair that Rose usually tied up was left to fly with its new layers and subtle highlights. Her big blue eyes were enhanced by contacts and her clear skin was immaculate with the barest amount of make-up. Every outfit Alice picked out fit her with an unbearable amount of perfection. I loved the new, confident Rose.

Suffice it to say that Emmett was one lucky man who kissed the ground that Rose walked on when she walked into my house that next morning. I don't think he had spent more than ten minutes while he was awake without talking to her or seeing her. It was ridiculously sweet, and I wanted to pat myself on the back for my matchmaking skills.

Alice approved of Edward immediately. They got along just as well as Emmett and Alice did. I was so relieved that my best friend approved. The day Emmett met Edward would always be solidified in my memories though. Edward had come over to pick up Alice and myself for a movie. Emmett opened the door, and I watched from behind him as Edward looked around to see if he had the right house.

"Um… is Bella home?" his voice squeaked out at the intimidation of seeing a guy as big as Emmett for the first time.

"Who the hell is asking? I don't remember my sister mentioning your punk ass," Emmett roared out. I held back my giggle as I listened to the exchange from the hall.

"I'm… Edward… I'm taking her and Alice out with my friend Jasper," Edward's meek voice filtered in. I could hear the confusion in his voice. He knew I was an only child.

"You think that I'm going to let you take _both_ my little sisters out? You're fucking nuts!" Emmett cried out. I couldn't help the giggle that burst through my mouth, and Alice quickly slapped her hand over my face.

"Bella never mentioned siblings… Alice is her sister? I thought they were friends?" the confusion was mounting for Edward as he stood on the porch.

"Maybe not by blood, but they are by everything that matters. I swear to you, Eddie, if you hurt Bella, I will snap your neck," Emmett's voice was calming and friendly as he gestured for Edward to enter the house. I popped out of the hall and ran to give Edward a hug.

"Sorry about that; he insisted upon it. This is Emmett. Don't let his size intimidate you 'cause he's really just a big teddy bear." I smiled up at Emmett as I spoke, and he winked at me before he walked back into the living room where Rose was already stretched out on the couch.

"Damn it, Bella, that was fucking scary! I thought I was going to get crushed on your front porch!" Edward whispered harshly until both Alice and I were laughing so hard tears rolled down our cheeks.

That night, Alice met Jasper, and it was absolute chaos. Alice looked out the car window and saw the tall blonde-haired, blue-eyed god of a guy and began to hyperventilate. She yanked out her compact and began to primp herself immediately. I had never seen her act that way around a guy. The second the door opened though, her panic attack disappear and she was relaxed and calm. It was ridiculous. That night, she jumped my case about not warning her.

"He was like a god, Bella! You could have told me I was going out with the sexiest man alive!" Alice whined as we collapsed on my bed.

"Sorry, I don't agree with that statement; I'm biased." I giggled, and she glared back at me.

"You know what I mean. That is like my _dream_ guy. He is all man, and I want him. Why does he have to life in Forks, WA?" she dramatically sighed and rolled onto her side.

"If it makes you feel any better, he was staring at you all night," I tried to fix my blunder of not warning her. She rolled her eyes at my attempt and smacked my arm.

"Staring isn't always a positive thing," she groaned pathetically. I smiled up at my ceiling and gave myself another pat on the back for matching people up. Jasper had cornered me and asked me all about Alice, but I wasn't about to tell her that yet.

Alice and Emmett didn't go home at the end of the week. I think Charlie was relieved by that fact. He loved that I wasn't alone and that Emmett was huge so he thought Edward was terrified of him, but Charlie didn't know that Edward and Emmett got along very well. Alice and Jasper were still skirting around each other, and I had to roll my eyes at both of them. We were all six gathered in Edward's basement watching movies when they finally acknowledged their mutual attractions.

"God, who picked this movie? Really guys… it's so cheesy," Rosalie complained as she curled herself further into Emmett's side. I grinned at her as her face flamed red and her eyes narrowed in warning.

"You picked it, Rose," Emmett laughed heartily. Edward turned a wide-eyed stare at Emmett waiting for an outburst from Rosalie, but was floored when nothing came.

"Wow, Em, I have to give you credit. You tamed the wild beast." Edward smirked over at the couple, and I choked back my laugh as Rosalie's eyebrows shot up into her hairline.

"Beast? What the fuck, Edward? You are a fucking prick!" Rose huffed out with her arms crossed over her chest and her bottom lips sticking out in a sultry pout.

"You're no beast, Rosie," Emmett's soft response brought a gentle smile to Rosalie's face. All of her features softened as she looked up at Emmett.

"I'm going for a popcorn refill, anyone else need some?" Alice asked suddenly. I could see her nervousness as she shuffled her feet and picked at her shirt hem.

"YES!" the room chorused out to her as she started to walk out. Jasper popped up from the recliner he had be sitting in and followed Alice into the kitchen.

"I'll help you. That's a lot of popcorn to bring out by yourself." He smiled shyly at her. Edward rolled his eyes at him before tightening his grip on my waist and resting his chin on my shoulder.

"Bet you they're in there making out like two dogs in heat," he whispered in my ear.

"Alice would never do that! You're on. What are your terms?" I whispered back to him. Edward's smile was sly and made me kind of nervous.

"If I win, I want you over here this weekend. Tell your dad you're staying at Rose's house. My parents are going to Chicago for the weekend. Please, Bella?" Edward whined as he bit my ear. I nodded my acceptance. I had been avoiding being 100% alone with him because I was terrified that if we had sex… he wouldn't like it.

"If I win, then I want you to go fishing with me and my dad next weekend," I whispered back evilly. I knew he would hate those terms, but I couldn't help it. I really wanted my dad to like him. It seemed like our relationship was instantaneous. I hadn't expressed my feelings because I didn't want it to hurt when I left. If we had sex, it would screw everything up. It would kill me to give so much to him just to leave him behind.

"I'm not scared because I know Jasper, and I know for a fact that I'm winning this bet." Edward stood up and set me on my feet. We both snuck toward the kitchen receiving awkward looks from Rosalie and Emmett to which we responded with quiet signals.

I leaned around the corner to peak into the kitchen and my jaw hit the floor. Jasper had Alice pressed against the refrigerator with his hands down the back of her pants squeezing her ass with her legs wrapped around his waist as Alice let out a soft moan. Alice was grinding herself against Jasper as their mouths met in a violent round of kisses. A small moan escaped from Alice again just as her eyes opened and she looked directly at me. I burst into laughter as Edward peaked into the room.

Alice gasped and shoved back from Jasper as she dropped her legs. Jasper stared at her in shock before following her gaze to see Edward and me in a pile at the door laughing our asses off. My stomach hurt from laughing at the two of them.

"I knew it!" Edward cried out when he caught his breath. Jasper glared at him as he grabbed for Alice's hand, but she jerked it out of his reach.

"Ahh… Ali, don't be a prude! I knew you wanted him, and I'm honestly surprised it took the two of you this damn long to act on your attractions," I giggled. Alice stomped out of the kitchen and into the bathroom before Jasper turned on the two of us on the floor.

"You two are fucking assholes! Seriously… she's shy as it is, and now I'll NEVER get her to kiss me again!" Jasper growled out.

"Oh, she'll kiss you again, and she is NOT that shy. She was just nervous you wouldn't want her, and she was a little worried that you live so far away." I sighed as I caught my breath. Jasper finally let a smile grace his lips before he leaned back against the counter.

"So, was it worth waiting for?" Edward asked. This had apparently been a topic of conversation for the two of them prior to that day.

"I would have waited lifetimes for that kind of kiss. You have no idea… I'm going to go check on her, though," Jasper spoke in a dreamy voice as he left the kitchen.

"Pack light, Bella; you won't need much for this weekend." Edward grinned down at me before pressing a kiss to my lips.

* * *

**Review... or don't. Whatever.**


	8. Sexual Healing

**A/N: Just gonna post all I have here. My beta twilight-is-lovee is awesome.**

**Playlist:**  
_Happy Together_ - Simple Plan  
_Be My Escape_ - Relient K  
_My First Kiss_ - 3OH!3  
_Hero_ - Enrique Iglesias  
_Hold It Against Me_ – Britney Spears  
_Take Me on the Floor_ – The Veronicas

* * *

**BPOV**

I stood in front of the floor length mirror that was sitting by Rosalie's closet. I didn't recognize the girl in front of me. I was wearing a short denim skirt that barely came to mid-thigh, along with a v-neck purple halter-top. The top had no back, so I wasn't wearing a bra, and the scrap of fabric Alice had shoved at me could hardly be considered underwear. I stared at the mysterious, smoky brown eyes and tilted my head in confusion at the plump pink lips in front of me. The dark curtain of hair fell straight to the curve of my ass and moved around me like a waterfall of mahogany… I didn't even know there were natural red highlights in my hair until that moment.

"Shit, where did I go?" I questioned in awe of the work Alice and Rose had put into me. Rose had learned a lot in the few weeks Alice had been around.

"You're in there. That's all you. Really, Bella, you give me an incredible canvas to work on," Alice grinned up from her latest fashion magazine. I looked down at my feet and cringed at the precarious heels on my feet. They were a glittery sliver color that matched the accessories Alice had forced on me.

"Edward is going to love it. You look hot, Bella. If I liked girls, I'd do you," Rosalie snorted without looking up from her phone. She had been glued to it since the moment she got Emmett's number.

"I think I'm going to give him a heart attack. He's never seen me in anything other than my jeans and t-shirts," I sighed. I felt the nervous fluttering in my stomach as the butterflies started to act.

"Trust me on this; I know Edward, and I've seen the girls he's dated in the past. You are a fucking knock out compared to any of them," Rosalie still didn't look up from her phone. A dreamy smile crossed her lips, and I rolled my eyes.

"Come on, Bella, he'll be here any minute to get you," Alice grinned and grabbed my bag for me. I knew she had added a few things to it, but I was terrified to look.

I had probably paced a small trench in the Hale's floor before a soft knock echoed around the empty room. Rose and Jasper's parents had gone out to dinner, Alice was holed up with Jasper, and Emmett was on his way to pick up Rose.

I was nervous, and the knock caused my heart to thunder against my ribcage. I stood staring at the door in trepidation for a few minutes before the knock sounded again.

"What the fuck, Bella? Answer the door!" Rosalie cried out from the top of the stairs. I heard his laugh behind the door before I pulled it open slowly and stuck my head out.

Edward looked at me and his eyes widened as his mouth fell open slightly. I hadn't opened the door completely yet because I feared his reaction. He stood gaping at me as his eyes traced over my face and down the length of my hair that had fallen over my shoulder.

"Hi," I spoke softly as I felt the blush rise to my cheeks.

"Your hair is so much longer than I ever thought it was," he blurted out before a blush of his own tinged his cheeks.

"Umm… it's because Alice straightened it," I mumbled before taking a deep breath and pulling the door open. I kept my eyes on the floor as I grabbed my bag from the side table, and the gasp I heard made me cringe in fear.

I looked up to see Edward's eyes opened wide and unblinking as they traced from my feet up over my bare legs, over my hips and the curve of my waist, and stopped at my breasts. I felt the already present blush deepen as I instinctively covered myself. Edward let out a rush of air and shook his head, pulling his eyes up to meet mine once again.

"Wow, Bella, I… um… just… wow," he breathed out. His hands gripped my wrists gently as he pulled them away from my chest and gave me the once over again. I felt so naked standing in front of him. He was wearing his normal holey jeans with a Kings of Leon concert t-shirt. His hair was in the normal disarray that I loved so much.

"I know… I told them not to do this and that you wouldn't like it. Let's just go and I'll change when we get to your house," I whispered sheepishly as I stepped onto the porch and pulled the door shut behind me.

"What are you talking about? I think you look gorgeous. Granted I would never take you out in public like this because this is _my_ body to look at and every straight guy within two miles would be drooling all over… is this shirt _backless_?" he cried out as his arm wrapped around my waist and his hand grazed the bare skin of my back.

"Pretty much," I smiled slightly at his slack-jawed expression.

"Fucking hell, remind me to thank Alice and Rosalie for this. It's kinda hot to see you dress up like this just for me," he pressed a soothing kiss to my temple as my body melted into his side.

Edward drove faster than he usually did to get us back to his house. I smiled at his enthusiasm. I couldn't sit still; my stomach was churning and my hands kept wringing together. Whenever Edward looked at me, I felt the heat of blush creep into my cheeks. He would grin wickedly at me before he would turn back to the road. I wanted to crawl in a hole, and I really wished I had fought harder against Rosalie and Alice. This would have been more comfortable without the show of barely-there clothing I was clad in.

"You know I'm not expecting anything right? I just want to be able to hold you freely without a chance of interruption." Edward sighed as I fidgeted in my seat some more. He pulled up his driveway, and my heart rate doubled.

"I… uh… yeah… I know that," I whispered as I stared intently at my hands in my lap, twisting the handle to my overnight bag.

"Isabella, look at me," Edward's breath fanned over my ear eliciting a shiver from me. I turned my head slightly and looked at him from behind the curtain of my hair. He grinned and shook his head before using his hand to push my hair behind my shoulder so I was staring into his eyes.

"I'm nervous," I sighed once his hand cupped my cheek with his thumb caressing my bottom lip. He smiled at me again and shook his head before pulling me over the center console onto his lap.

"You have nothing to be nervous about. I'm not going to force anything on you. Just relax and let whatever happens, happen. If you get uncomfortable at all, you just say the word and I'll take you back to the Hales'," as he spoke, the sweet smell of his breath mixed with his cologne washed over me, and I laid my head on his shoulder.

"That's not going to happen because I want to spend time with you… fall asleep in your arms and wake up next to you," I released a sigh of contentment before Edward pushed open his door and set me out on my feet before grabbing my bag.

As we walked up the drive and onto the porch, Edward swung our entwined hands back and forth, making me giggle. He tried to give me a stern look, but a laugh escaped him before he pushed the door open.

"Come on, beautiful, I have a surprise for you," Edward dropped my bag in the foyer and dragged me across the house until we reached the steps to the basement. Edward's face was suddenly stoic as he gripped the door handle and took a deep breath. "Close your eyes and hop on my back," he cleared his throat before bending down to allow me up.

I didn't question him and complied with his request. I heard the door creak open and felt as he began descending the stairs. He paused and I felt his shoulders shift slightly before he began his walk down the stairs again and I could only assume he was making sure my eyes were closed.

"You can open your eyes now, Bella," he whispered as he stopped again. I slowly let my eyes open and pressed a kiss to his neck before I looked around the room. I smiled at the sight before me.

"This is so great! You're incredible!" I cried out as I dropped to the floor. An air mattress was laid out in the middle of the floor, completely made up. The couches were all moved back and the table lay off to the side covered in every movie snack known to man as well as two pizza boxes. There was a bottle of sparkling cider and two expensive looking glasses along with a clear plastic bowl containing strawberries and grapes. I let a bark of laughter out at the bowl of fruit.

"What? I wanted to be prepared for anything," he looked sheepish, but he led me to the makeshift bed on the floor. I took a seat and grabbed a few pieces of pizza while he popped some popcorn.

When Edward and I were both settled, he turned on the television and started the movie. I gaped at him as the menu screen came up with the new Shrek movie. I had never mentioned wanting to see this movie, plus it was new to theatres.

"How did you know, and how did you get this?" I questioned. A look of pride overcame Edward's face, allowing a smug smile to emerge.

"I heard you and Alice talking about how pathetic you thought it was that you were dying to see this. I got it because I know a guy who works at the theatre in Port Angeles that owed me a favor. He burned a copy for me," his voice was so smug, and it turned me on. I jumped onto his lap and attacked his lips.

**EPOV**

I wasn't planning for the making out portion of our evening to begin so quickly. When Bella jumped on my lap, I was in shock. I froze before kissing her back. My first thought was to move right to my plans of seduction, but I knew she was nervous already. I let the kissing continue for a few minutes before I gripped her hips and moved her to sit beside me.

"Patience, Bella. I don't want to rush anything. We've got all night, okay?" I whispered to her as she sighed. I smirked at her before pulling her in close to my side and pressing play on our move.

Bella tortured me throughout the entire movie; I couldn't remember anything I had watched. She would move just the tiniest bit and rub against my crotch with her ass or hip, claiming she was just trying to get comfortable. I didn't question her. The friction was nice, but it only made my cock ache even more.

"Honey, you've gotta stop moving," I growled in her ear when she pushed her ass hard against my rock hard cock.

"Am I making you uncomfortable?" she questioned with falsified innocence. I gripped her hip and slammed myself into her ass causing a satisfying gasp to escape her lips.

"You're making me horny," I licked her neck and nibbled on her earlobe. The shiver that ran through her showed me I was having the same effect on her. My hand slid under the hem of her tiny skirt, and I felt her take in a deep breath. My fingers barely grazed her cloth-covered clit, and she cried out when my hand moved back down her thigh to stay on her knee.

"You can't just do that and stop!" She spun herself to face me. I knew I was grinning maliciously at her, but it was still entertaining to watch her squirm.

"What are you going to do about it?" My voice was low and filled with my arousal. I watched the light pink flush of her cheeks darken as her hands fisted in my shirt. Bella yanked me down on top of her and I barely caught myself before I crushed her under my weight.

"I'm going to do this," she whispered just before her lips smashed against mine. I couldn't hold back the groan that left me. She rubbed herself against me as our lips, teeth, and tongues clashed together. The kiss was far from the romantic ones I had envisioned for the night. It was laced with fear, impatience, and pure need. As much as I hated it, I had to pull away. I wanted to make everything perfect for Bella.

"God, we've got all night. Why do we need to rush it?" I questioned against her mouth. A gentle sigh left her lips as her body went limp and she released her grip on my shirt.

"Can I tell you something?" Bella's hands were suddenly in my hair and pushing the strands away from my eyes in a way that made my heart clench.

"Of course you can," I replied to her with a small smile as I allowed my fingers to rub circles into her hips.

"I was really nervous about tonight, you know? It was like the ultimate pressure knowing that we were planning on having sex tonight, but then I walked into this room and saw all the thought you put into this night for us. It's not about the sex. I'm not nervous anymore," she finished in a voice that was so low I had to lean in closer just to hear her.

Suddenly my heart was in my throat. I felt sweat dripping down my back and my hands were clammy. She may not have been nervous but I most certainly was. What if I wasn't good enough or if I hurt her? I mean I was not new to sex and we'd never had that conversation before so I didn't know if she was experienced.

"Um… well… can we talk a little before we… go further?" I stuttered out while rolling off to lie beside her.

"Of course, what is it you want to talk about?" Her voice was slightly amused as she stared at me with a smirk.

"How many guys have you had sex with?" The words were out of my mouth before I could soften them. Bella's eyes widened and her cheeks flamed red before she rolled completely off the air mattress and walked to the smallest chair in the room.

"Can we not have this discussion?" Her voice was weak and shaky. I watched her carefully, but she wouldn't look up at me.

"What's the matter?" While I asked her, I moved over to the couch closest to her so I could try to see her face.

"Well… before we moved to Phoenix, we lived in Tempe. Um… I had a neighbor who was my best friend. She had an older brother… Can we please not talk about this?" she whimpered as her hands covered her face and a sob ripped from her chest. I didn't know what to do.

"Bella, talk to me. I'm here for you." I rubbed my hand over her back in a soothing gesture until her heartbeat slowed and her breathing was no longer coming out in gasps.

"I was twelve… he was sixteen. I didn't know what he was doing to me… I didn't understand when he was kissing me until his hand was up my skirt and inside of me. I told him to stop but he wouldn't listen to me. He kept going and told me that I would like it. I just… I didn't know." Bella's voice was barely a whisper, and I listened to her. Her body shook slightly before she took in a deep breath and turned to me.

"It went on for a year. He told me that I was special and that's why he was touching me and that he wasn't trying to hurt me. He said that if his sister found out, she would hate me, so I couldn't tell anyone. On the last day, he actually hurt me. His friend was over and he made me do things with both of them together and separately. I ran home crying and told my mom. She pressed charges and I had counseling. I'm over it. I accept it now, but I just… don't like talking about it," she mumbled as she wiped away tears. I felt anger fill my body before I squeezed her to me tightly and took several calming breaths.

"Bella… I don't know what to say… we don't have to do this," I whispered through my shock.

"No, I want to be with you. Those two boys are the only two who I have been with," she sighed deeply, and I wanted to scream.

"Baby, you weren't with them. They raped you. Don't _ever_ consider that sex," my voice was fierce as I regarded her in that moment. She nodded and her breath whooshed out of her before she pressed her cheek to my chest.

"I usually don't think about it that way. Only you, my mother, and Alice know that about me." She smiled slightly at me before her eyes saddened and then returned to normal.

"I've been with two girls. They were both relationships that were at least three months along before anything happened. If you asked anyone around here, they will tell you I've been with at least twelve girls. I've dated a lot, but I am not a man-whore." I grinned down at her and ran my fingers through her hair.

"Why would people think you've been with that many girls?" Bella asked as her fingers traced the outline of my abs through my shirt.

"I've had my fair share of dates with girls. I've only had sex with two of them, but I've done… other things with them." I groaned at the sensations her fingers caused in me.

"Wanna show me what all you know how to do?" she whispered in my ear before biting her bottom lip and looking up at me through her lashes.

I couldn't even form words. My mouth was watering at the look on her face, and I needed her more in that moment than I could ever describe. I pushed on her shoulders to have her lying down again before positioning myself above her.

My hands found the edge of her top, and I pulled it up over her head and gasped at the sight of her naked breasts. I had seen my fair share of breasts, but Bella's were the perfect size. They were round and perky, and her nipples were absolutely alluring. My hands slid down from her shoulders and across her collarbone to grip her breasts in my hands.

"GAHH!" Bella cried out as her back arched up off the bed. I smiled in satisfaction as her heartbeat doubled.

"Shh… this is only the start of it." I ghosted my lips over her throat before I continued the kisses down her chest and through the valley between her breasts. Bella gasped as my lips trailed down to her stomach and my tongue dipped into her navel.

"Shit… what are you… oh god!" Her words were incoherent mumbles. I had to admit I was a little smug, as I hadn't even started pleasing her to my potential.

My hands found the zipper to her skirt. I quickly removed her skirt and paused at her sexy purple sheer thong. She might as well have gone commando for all the coverage that piece of scrap provided her.

"Please, Edward," her voice rang out around me as her hips lurched off the bed. I shook my head, removed the thong, and stared down at her. I wasn't expecting to find her bare, but she was. I allowed my fingers to dance up her thighs and graze over the bare skin above her glistening lips.

"Can I… taste you?" I questioned as I stared up at her. Bella nodded with her eyes squinting tightly and her bottom lips straining between her teeth.

"Relax, Bella." I reached up and gently pulled her lip from her teeth before I moved back between her legs. I moved my hands beneath her ass to raise her up so I could have a better angle.

I started by sliding my finger between her slick lips, eliciting a loud, throaty moan from Bella. Without giving her any warning, I lowered my head and my tongue flicked out to trace her clit. I felt her hands gripping my hair tightly as she stuttered out her breaths.

"Holy hell!" she screamed out while tugging me closer to her. A grin spread across my lips as I dipped two fingers into her.

Bella's hips pushed against my hand and tongue as I worked her over. She writhed and cried out my name on a continuous loop. It didn't take long before she was gasping and squirming away from me before her orgasm crashed down over her. Her entire body went limp and she tugged at my hair.

"Too sensitive… stop please," she rasped out as she pulled me up to hover over her. I smirked down at her flushed face and completely relaxed posture.

**BPOV**

My entire body felt like jell-o. I couldn't move and all I could think about was sleep. I wanted to curl my body around Edward's and drift off into the best night of sleep I had ever had, but Edward had other plans.

"Too sensitive for me to go any further?" he whispered with a husky quality to his voice. I looked up into his lust darkened eyes and shook my head no. Edward smiled down at me and pressed his lips to mine gently before opening my mouth with his tongue and deepening the kiss. It was a strange sensation to taste myself on his lips.

"Mmm… you're wearing way too much clothing," I moaned out as my hands roamed over the expanse of his chest through his shirt. At my words Edward sat back on his knees and tore his shirt over his head before quickly removing his pants while leaving his boxers on.

"Bella… are you… positive about… this?" he questioned between the kisses he was raining down along my neck and jaw.

I didn't say anything just grabbed at his hips and pushed his boxers down over them. He groaned when my hand wrapped around his cock. I moved my hand against the surprisingly silky skin and Edward bucked against my hand.

"I'm positive," I whispered before I gently bit down on his ear lobe. A hoarse cry left his lips and his hot breath fanned against my neck as he groaned. Suddenly he was off me and crawling back to his pants. He searched frantically through the pockets.

"FUCK! I know I put them in here," he growled at the fabric before looking around the room. It was a rather entertaining sight once I realized he was searching for a condom and running around the room naked.

"Baby, relax… you'll find them," I choked out as I tried not to let my laughter loose. Edward heard the strain of my words and spun around to look at me with narrowed eyes.

"What are you giggling about? I can't find the condoms, and if we don't find them… this can't happen tonight." He motioned between us as he spoke and the laughter I was fighting burst from my lips.

"You're naked and you're hard. You look hilarious running around like that," I gasped through the tears of my laughter. Edward looked down at himself and blushed before grabbing his boxers and covering himself to continue his search. He finally found the box on the counter in the mini kitchen.

"Finally, now stop giggling," he growled again, and I immediately stopped as he dropped his boxers again. Edward crawled onto the bed and pushed me back so he was hovering over me. His fingers dipped into my core again as his lips met mine roughly.

My body arched in response to his actions and I heard the foil package tear so I opened my eyes to see him spitting the foil off to the side then sliding the condom over his length with skilled hands. He positioned himself at my entrance before giving me a loaded look filled with questions.

Without speaking, I told him it was okay to continue, and he pressed himself against me. I forced myself to relax as I felt the head of his cock enter me. He froze and took in a few deep breaths, and I copied his breathing. When we were both relaxed again, I urged him forward. He pushed into me slowly until he completely filled me and froze once again.

"Are you okay?" he whispered, leaning into me. I nodded, and he smiled at me before pushing my hair back from my face. "I'm going to move now. Tell me if it hurts you," he sighed as his hips pulled away from me only to move back into me again. The sensation was incredible. My entire body felt like it was on fire.

His hips moved slowly at first, but I squeezed his arms and begged him to go faster. I just wanted to feel. I lost myself in the moment but came back quickly as Edward placed one of my legs over his shoulder. The new position put him deeper into me, and I cried out as my orgasm crashed over me in waves. I felt him move faster against me, and I could hear the slap of our skin mixed in with our cries of pleasure, and he was suddenly screaming my name before collapsing on top of me.

"Wow," I breathed into his hair as I rubbed my hands over his back and shoulders and then through his hair.

"Uh-huh," he mumbled as he breathed heavily. His weight on me felt fantastic, and I could have fallen asleep just the way we were, but he moved once his breathing was normal again. I watched him remove the condom and throw it in the small trashcan beside us before he lay back down.

"Wow, that was… incredible," I sighed while I curled into his side.

"Fuck; that was more than incredible, Bella. There are no words to describe that," he mumbled into my hair. His fingers ran soothingly through my hair as he hummed to me. I fell into an exhausted sleep completely naked and sated, curled next to the man I had fallen head over heels for.

* * *

**Reveiw... or don't. Whatever.**


	9. Seperation Anxiety

**A/N: Another chapter! Thanks again to twilight-is-lovee, she's an amazing beta and oh so patient!**

**Playlist:**  
_Mine_ – Taylor Swift_  
I Shot the Sheriff _- Bob Marley_  
Again_ - Flyleaf  
_Bubbly_ - Colbie Caillat  
_What Hurts the Most_ – Rascal Flatts  
_I Drive Myself Crazy_ – 'NSYNC  
_Here Without You _– 3 Doors Down

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**EPOV**

My night with Bella was incredible. I had the most incredible night of sleep—on an air mattress, of all things—all because of her. The smell of her hair mixed with her warm breath across my chest was the equivalent of a lullaby to me. I contemplated waking her up for another round around one a.m. but decided she was most likely a little sore and I didn't want to seem demanding or pushy.

I woke about an hour before Bella did, but I didn't dare move. Her hair was fanned out around her on the pillow next to me while she was curled up into my side with my arm around her waist. A small serene smile played on her lips and they were just begging me to kiss them.

As I watched her eyelids flutter and listened to her sighs I made the decision that she wouldn't be sore enough to pass up our last opportunity to have sex until god knows when. I pushed her hair back from her face and leaned down to press my lips on her forehead. Her smile grew and my name left her lips in a breathy whisper as she curled further into my side.

That moment sealed the deal for me and I ran my hand down her waist and over her hip to rest awkwardly on her upper thigh while I reached my other hand over and dragged my fingers over her collarbone to slip down over her breast where I tugged at her nipple lightly. I delighted in the small gasp and moan that escaped her lips. Before I had the chance to press my lips to hers I was pinned down to the bed with Bella straddling me and her mouth crashing down on mine.

"Oh shit, Bella," the words left my mouth in a groan as she rocked her hips against my aching erection.

"Don't start it if you can't finish it," she purred into my ear, and my eyes widened at her boldness. I rather enjoyed the feisty side of her.

"You better believe I finish what I start, Isabella," I growled back at her before flipping her over to cover her body with mine. I waggled my eyebrows at her suggestively before bending my head to capture a nipple in my mouth. However, before I reached my destination, the song _I Shot the Sheriff _by Bob Marley rang out through the room.

"Fuck, it's my dad," Bella mumbled as she shoved me off her.

_Way to kill the mood, Chief_, I thought to myself as Bella searched her bag for her phone. When she pulled it out of the side compartment of the bag, a scrap of powder blue lace fell onto the floor.

"Hi Dad, what's up?" she questioned with falsified cheerfulness. I raised my eyebrow at her before grabbing the piece of fabric a company passed off as underwear. God it made me hard just looking at it. Bella only blushed and spun away from me completely forgetting she was completely nude. That fact gave me a great view regardless of which way she faced.

"I'm with Edward. He picked me up for breakfast this morning. Didn't Rose or Alice tell you?" Bella's voice came off as innocent, but I could hear the sarcasm in the response. I wondered how Rose or Alice would know to tell Charlie that we had gone to breakfast.

"Okay, I'll have him drive me over there now. What's the matter?" The sarcasm left her voice as the concern leeched in. As Bella listened for a few moments, the color in her face steadily drained away and her mouth dropped open.

"Is she home? How did she break it badly enough to need surgery?" Bella cried out in panic. I stared at her as she sank down to the floor and pulled her knees to her chest.

"I'll be back at Rose's in fifteen to twenty minutes to get the truck and I'll meet you at the house." Her voice was soft on these last lines before she ended the call without any other exchange. I looked at her expectantly and she shook her head.

"Is everything okay?" I asked her as I pulled on my boxers and laid a blanket over her shoulders.

"I guess. I mean… my mom went skiing and broke her leg horribly enough to need surgery. The doctors set it the best they could, but Phil wanted her back here for the surgery. They're on the plane home now and an ambulance is meeting them at the airport to take her to the hospital. I've got to go home," Bella stated without looking up at me but pulling the blanket around her.

Her last statement took a moment to register in my head before I felt like I was punched in the gut and all the wind was knocked out of me. Bella was leaving… and it wasn't in another four weeks; it was right then. I panicked and tried to come up with anyway that she wouldn't need to leave.

"There's nothing you can do to help, right? So stay here? Please," I practically begged as I watched her stand up and walk over to her bag. She shook her head at me and pulled on a pair of underwear followed by some shorts.

"I can't stay. As soon as Phil's boss knows he's back in town, they'll make him go back to work, and somebody has to be around to help my mom when she needs something." Her voice was soft and sounded so far away.

I couldn't even form words to respond as I watched her pick up her discarded clothing from the night before and then continue to dress herself before making it look like she hadn't just woken up after fucking her boyfriend the night before.

"Bella, please, you can't just… leave like this! We're supposed to have another whole month together!" I tried to speak calmly, but everything she stuffed in her bag was like a stab to my chest. I had spent every day with here since we met, and now there was no telling when I would see her again.

"I'm sorry. God, I don't want to leave. I'll miss you so much," she whispered with her back to me but I could clearly hear the tears in her voice. I sighed before walking over to her and wrapping my arms around her waist.

"If you're leaving… does that mean… we're over?" I asked her cautiously. I could feel her body tense and a drop of wet hit my arm followed quickly by more wetness. It didn't take me long to realize the wetness on my arm was her tears.

"Does… it… have… to?" she hiccupped through her tears. I laid my head on her shoulder and shook it against her.

"No. Our senior years are starting. We can make a long distance thing work until college. We can try for the same school," I whispered huskily. I didn't want her to cry. It was breaking my heart to hear it.

"Yeah… and I'll come back for Christmas," she sniffled as she turned to look at me. I felt my throat tighten and the sting of tears as I looked into her glassy, red-rimmed eyes.

"Fuck, Bella," I choked out before clearing my throat. "Come on, baby, your mom needs you." I grabbed her duffle bag from her hands and dropped it to the couch. I pulled her into a tight hug before tilting her head up so our lips met.

Our lips crashed together desperately. My fingers found their way up into her hair as I pulled her face closer to mine, and her hands mimicked my movements. I could taste the saltiness of fresh tears, but I wasn't sure if they were hers or mine. Her body jerked under the force of her sob, and as her mouth opened, my tongue slid out and tangled with hers. My knees felt weak, and I held back my own sob.

I couldn't figure out how in only four short weeks I had fallen in love with Bella. My entire heart and soul belonged to her, and it felt like a part of me was being ripped away at a slow and painful pace.

It was hard to breathe between the kiss and the silent sobs wracking my body, but I didn't end the kiss. I couldn't fathom that it would be our last kiss for almost six months. I almost felt sick at the very thought of it. I gripped her hair tighter in my fists, and she whimpered before pressing herself further into me. A half groan/half sob escaped me, causing Bella to finally pull away and look up at me.

"Edward, don't cry," she whispered and used her thumbs to wipe the tears from my cheeks and pressed a quick peck to my quivering lips.

"I'm sorry… I just… Bella, I love you," my voice was a whimper and I took deep breath before I looked into her eyes. The shock on Bella's voice almost caused a fresh wave of tears to overcome me, but I managed to hold them back.

"I love you too." Her voice was thick with emotion, and she stared into my eyes as she spoke. We stood in each other's arms staring for an indeterminate amount of time before the shrill sound of _Bubbly _by Colbie Caillat filled the room around us.

"That's Alice," Bella whispered softly before reaching out to the table that held her purse and grabbing her phone all without leaving my arms.

"Hey, Ali," she sighed into the speaker.

**BPOV**

My head a chest were aching with the pain of leaving Edward. It only took me four weeks to fall completely head over heels for him, and the last thing I wanted to do was jump on a plane that would take me 1584.6 miles—I had mapquested it the moment I realized I was falling for Edward—away.

I realized that my mother was hurt, and while it wasn't life-threatening, she needed me. I couldn't just abandon her. I stared at Edward and tried to memorize everything about him before Alice's ringtone interrupted me. I knew I needed to get going, but I just couldn't make myself move from his arms.

"Don't 'hey, Ali' me! I'm packing your shit. Emmett and I are going back with you. Are you okay? I mean surgery is pretty damn serious! Are you and Edward on your way to get the truck? Hurry up, Bella! Our plane leaves in like five hours. We've got to ride the damn death trap from Port Angeles to Seattle just to make it in time. That plane leaves in like ninety minutes. Get your ass in gear!" Alice cried out all in one breath.

"I'm leaving Edward's now…" My voice was softer than I intended it to be, and Alice caught it immediately as I cleared my throat.

"Oh shit, Bells! You have to leave Edward; honey, are you alright?" Her tone softened. I could feel the sympathy radiating from her over the line.

"No, but I don't want to discuss it right now. I'll be there in about fifteen minutes. Thanks for packing my stuff," I mumbled before hanging up and squeezing Edward hard.

"We have to get going or I'll miss my flights," I sighed and sucked back more tears. Edward pressed a gentle kiss to my forehead and rocked us from side to side for a few seconds before breaking our connection. I felt empty immediately.

"If I don't take you now, I'll never let you go," he explained quietly before he grabbed my duffle bag and my hand, leading me out to his car. He opened the door for me, and I sat down with my bag curled in my arms.

We didn't talk on the ride to my truck. I tried my best not to cry the entire time, and Edward's grip alternated between tight enough to turn his knuckles white and barely gripping the wheel. When he pulled the car up into the Hale driveway, I could feel the tension in the air thicken.

"I love you, Bella. I fucking love you. Call me when you land in Seattle and then when you land in Phoenix. Call me every second you have free." His voice was soft, and I could tell he was fighting off tears again.

"I swear to you I will. I love you too, Edward. I'll miss you so damn much," I whimpered through the lump in my throat. He turned around and pulled me to him over the console.

"I'll miss you too, baby." His lips crashed down on mine desperately, and his tongue wasted no time delving into my mouth and exploring every inch of it. I kissed him back with just as much desperation but successfully held my tears at bay.

Edward broke the kiss and pulled open his door and proceeded to pull us both out of the car through his door. He threw my duffle bag into the back of my truck and carried me over to my door.

"I've gotta go." I didn't dare look into his eyes. I knew I would see the same heartbreak I felt reflected in his eyes.

"I know," he sighed. His hand pushed my chin up and met my lips with a soft, slow kiss that made my knees weak. Edward set me down and held open my door for me. We didn't say anything else, but he kissed the top of my head before slamming the door and running back to his car. He peeled out of the driveway, and before I could look up into my rearview mirror, he was gone.

I started my truck and pulled out of Rosalie's driveway. As I drove back toward Charlie's house, my eyes filled with tears, and the road was fuzzy in my vision. I gasped as a sob burst from my lips and my body started to shake. I tried to concentrate on the turns I needed to make, but the scream that left my lips caused me to pull the truck over.

My chest ached. I had never experienced so much pain. I doubled over and wrapped my arms around my stomach as the tears poured from my eyes. My throat was raw from the cries that escaped me. I wasn't sure how long I sat in the truck bawling and screaming out in agony, but I felt warm arms wrap around me before I heard the voice that the arms belonged to.

"Oh, Bells, I'm sorry," Emmett sighed as he pulled me into his chest. I curled into his arms and allowed him to pull me off the seat. I vaguely heard Alice say she would pull the truck into the driveway.

I guessed that I made it pretty close to home… not home, though—Charlie's house. That made me cry harder and my shoulders shook with the force. I heard Charlie talk to me, but I didn't understand what he was saying. Emmett lowered me into a cab that I looked at briefly, and the sobs became louder at the sight as the realization that I really was leaving at that moment washed over me.

"Bella, your mom is fine!" I heard Charlie call out to me through my haze. I looked up at him and met his worried eyes.

"It's not about Renee," Alice sighed before climbing in next to me. Charlie's eyes widened and his face started to turn red.

"What did he do?" Charlie roared out as his hand reached for the gun at his hip. I shook my head frantically and wanted to say something, but the tears and sobs wouldn't slow and my throat was raw.

"I don't think it's that he did anything, Charlie. I think it's because she's got to leave him." Emmett patted Charlie on the back before he walked around to the front seat of the cab and climbed into the passenger door.

"Alice, can you call me when you get into Port Angeles and land in Seattle and Phoenix?" Charlie asked, still not looking quite convinced that Edward hadn't done anything wrong.

"Love you, Dad," I croaked out as he reached into the backseat and hugged me. He grunted out a response before closing the door and waving at me. The numbness slowly crawled over me as the tears slowed and my sobs calmed down.

Alice held me in her arms as she rubbed her hand up and down my back. She knew exactly what I needed in that moment, and I was incredibly glad that she was there with me.

"You want to talk about it?" she asked me while gently running her fingers through my disheveled hair. I shook my head no and proceeded to stare out the window as I fought back all thoughts of Edward. It proved to be a pointless fight because all I could see was the pain in his green eyes as I told him I was leaving. I could feel the desperation in his last kiss, and my heartbeat sped at the thought.

"Alice," I croaked out after a half an hour into the ride. "I love him," I whispered without looking into her eyes. Alice squeezed me in closer to her.

"I know you do, sweetie, I know you do." She pressed her chin to my head and rocked me while I let out a few more quiet sobs that I had been holding in.

The rest of the ride into Port Angeles was uneventful. I stared out the window at my reflection, watching numbly as the tears continued to slide down my cheeks silently. My eyes were red and puffy while a flush covered my face. I couldn't control the tears, regardless of the numbness that continued to flow through me. I needed to be strong and think about my mother and what was going on with her. She needed me to be there for her completely, not half-heartedly.

**EPOV**

I ran from the truck as my eyes welled up with tears. I was Edward Cullen… why was I so damn upset about her leaving? _Because you're in love with her_, the voice in my head sighed. I slammed my car into reverse and peeled out of the driveway before I lost all resolve.

I couldn't handle the pain that was written all over her face. My chest burned as the unshed tears in my eyes started to fall. I growled at the steering wheel and pressed my foot harder against the gas pedal. I needed to get home immediately. I flung my car around the bend in the road and the flashing blue and red lights caused me to groan and wipe at my eyes. The last thing I needed was for anyone to see me crying, especially a cop.

I pulled to a stop and let my head fall onto the steering wheel. The tears came faster as my distraction of driving was removed. I thought about the look on her face when she realized she was leaving. A sob ripped through me as I relived the last kiss we shared by her truck. I was so desperate to express how I felt about her.

I was pulled from my memories by a tap on my window. I sucked in a deep breath and wiped at my face before I rolled my window down and looked out into the officer's face. I didn't recognize him but I pulled out my license and registration without speaking to him.

"Are you alright son?" he asked as his eyes squinted and he looked at me closer. I nodded my head but he didn't move away from my window.

"I'm fine," my voice cracked with the two words. The officer sighed and leaned down into my window.

"Edward Cullen… Charlie told me to watch out for you. Are you on something?" he questioned while he stared into my blood shot eyes.

"FUCK! NO, I'M NOT ON SOMETHING! My fucking girlfriend just left to go back to Phoenix, and I don't know when I'll see her again! My heart feels like it's dead and my chest is burning like I've never felt before! I just want to get the fuck home!" I cried out with my fists clenched to my side. My chest was heaving and my entire body was shaking.

"Ah… so Bella left today. Go home, kid." He patted my shoulder and set my registration and license on my lap. I looked up at him in shock. I was expecting some sort of punishment for my outburst. I knew if it had been the Chief, he would have killed me for my disrespect.

"I'm going to let you go with a warning this time. Get home and please slow down so you don't hurt yourself or someone else. Bella would be devastated if something happened to you." He sighed and pushed away from my window with a look of pity on his face. I would take his pity because I couldn't handle anything else bad happening to me at the moment.

I sat in my car taking deep breaths to calm myself as I stared straight ahead of me. I barely noticed the flashing lights stop and the cruiser pull away from me. I felt the pain in my chest expanding, and I sighed before rubbing at my sore eyes. I took a quick look in the mirror and gasped at the state of my face.

"Fuck," I growled at my reflection. I looked horrible; it was no wonder the officer had though I was high. My cheeks were sunken in, eyes bloodshot and glassy, my pupils were dilated, and to top it off, my lips were still slightly swollen from my night and morning with Bella.

A gasp passed my lips at the memories of us together. I suddenly felt like I couldn't breathe. My heart was in my throat as I continued to painfully suck air into my lungs, but no relief came to me. I stared at my reflection as I hyperventilated, and my stomach lurched from the pain in my chest. I flung my car door open and retched out the entire contents of my stomach, followed by dry heaves.

After about ten minutes of gagging outside of my car door, I was able to calm myself and my breathing down to a somewhat normal pace. Why should her leaving be so physically painful? I expected the emotional pain but never anticipated anything physical. I could completely see how someone could die of a broken heart.

I drove myself home, walked down into the basement, and came into direct contact with the evidence of our prior evening. I could still smell the sex in the air. I collapsed on the couch and stared at the bed where we had consummated our love only hours before. I don't know how long I sat there, but I was torn from the numbness my body had created to protect my mind by my cell phone ringing. I grabbed it and quickly answered it.

"Bella?" I questioned desperately. I hadn't paid attention to the ringtone to know if it was her, but I could only pray. I missed her voice.

"Edward, I'm sorry, man. You want me to come over?" Jasper's voice came over the line, and I heard Rosalie in the background sighing.

"No, I kind of want to be alone," I mumbled as I ran my fingers through my hair and tugged on it hard enough to make me wince hoping to distract myself from the pain in my chest.

"You're not the only one hurting here," Jasper whispered softly. I thought about his statement and realized that Alice and Emmett must have left with Bella.

"Come on over," I sighed and felt more tears burning my eyes again. I didn't want to cry again. I sucked in a breath and willed the numbness I had felt before to seep back in.

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**Review... or don't. Whatever.**


	10. Misery Loves Company

**A/N: I hope you're liking this story! My beta rocks! Thanks twilight-is-lovee!**

**Playlist:**  
_Breakeven _by The Script  
_Lost Without Each Other_ - Hanson  
_Keep Holding On_ - Avril Lavigne  
_Hey There Delilah_ - Plain White T's  
_Airplanes_ - B.O.B ft. Hayley Williams  
_Need You Now_ - Lady Antebellum

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**BPOV**

We landed in Seattle and rushed through security to get to our gate just in order to wait for the flight to Phoenix to leave. I stared at my phone and cursed myself. I told him I would call when I landed, but how was I supposed to hear his voice without the numbness leaving me? Alice was sitting next to me talking to Jasper while Emmett was pacing in front of us talking lowly to Rosalie. They weren't burning like I was. Of course they wouldn't be; money was no object, and they had the power to do whatever they wanted… like see the ones they left behind every weekend or holiday.

The numbness roiled against me as the pain seeped into my heart. I wouldn't see Edward until Christmas. My stomach churned at the realization that Christmas was nearly six months away. The edges of my reality snapped around me and I stared at my phone praying that I was only dreaming… no, not dreaming but having a hellacious nightmare.

Alice poked me in the side and pointed to my phone before mouthing 'Call him' to me. I sighed and opened up my phone. I glared at the image there… it was of Edward and I… we were kissing but our eyes stared into the camera with big grins on both of our faces. The image only made the acidic burn in my throat worse and reminded me of what I had to leave behind.

While I stared at the picture, my phone rang. I listened to the music of _No Air _by Jordan Sparks filled my ears. I knew it was him. I wanted to answer it, but I could only stare at the phone as it continued to ring. The music stopped, and I sucked in a deep breath trying to hold off my sob, but the music stared again. I let out a sigh of relief and pressed the send button to answer the call.

"Hi," I whispered. I heard what sounded like a choked gasp over the line, and the knife in my chest twisted a little deeper.

"Bella, you didn't call me," he whispered back to me. I choked on my own sob and sucked in a deep breath before speaking to calm myself.

"I didn't want it to hurt any worse," I admitted as he sighed into the line.

"Not talking won't make it hurt any less, baby." Edward sighed again, and I could practically see his face filled with frustration at my logic.

"I miss you, and it's only been a couple of hours." My voice was still soft, and he grunted in agreement. We were quiet for a few minutes before Edward spoke again.

"Can I fly out to see you? I mean, once everything is settled and all that?" he asked with desperation in his voice. I wanted to hold him.

"I would love that. I was freaking out over having to wait until Christmas to come back to see you," I told him as I pulled my knees up to my chest. The pain wasn't so bad with his voice in my ear. I could close my eyes and almost feel him sitting next to me.

"I would never let it take almost six months for me to see you again, Bella; I love you too much for that." His voice sounded tense as he spoke.

"What's wrong, baby?" I asked him softly. He groaned into the phone, and I could hear voices in the background.

"Jasper and Rose are here… moral support," he mumbled, and the voices were suddenly gone. I realized he must have moved away from them.

"God, this fucking sucks," I growled into the phone and heard Edward give a strained chuckle.

"You're telling me. I got pulled over and the officer thought I was high because my eyes were all red and shit." He laughed humorlessly again.

"Wow, did you get a ticket?" I questioned him, thankful for the distraction of a normal conversation.

"No, he let me go because he felt sorry for me. Apparently, your dad has all the officers watching for me, and this one understood that we were together. He gave me a warning and let me go." He sighed yet again into the phone. I knew he was hurting just as much as I was, so I didn't comment on it.

"I miss you," I whispered as I held back the tears that were starting to burn my eyes.

"I miss you too… so fucking much. God, Bella…" Edward's voice cracked, and I felt another piece of my heart breaking off.

"I don't know how to do this. It hurts so much," I gasped into the line and felt the tears sliding freely down my cheeks. I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked up into Emmett's eyes. His eyes looked sad, but I could feel the pity emanated from him as he watched me cry.

"We'll figure this out. I know it hurts. I feel like my heart has been ripped out of my chest," his mumble came through the line. I stared hard at Emmett as he motioned that I needed to hang up so we could board our flight.

"I have to go… the flight is boarding." A sob broke through my chest at the thought of losing his velvety voice.

"Already?" he questioned with a hint of desperation. I nodded even though he couldn't see me. I couldn't respond for fear of breaking down again. My wall of numbness had been completely shattered.

"Fuck… I love you, Bella. This time will you _please _call me when you land?" He sighed again, and I felt the knife in my heart twist deeper as another piece broke off. I was leaving that piece right there in the airport. It almost felt like I was leaving a trail of breadcrumbs.

"I love you too, Edward. I'll call, I promise," I whispered before ending the call. I couldn't stand to hear him say goodbye, and I certainly didn't have the strength to keep myself composed any longer.

Alice held my hand as we walked onto the flight. I felt weak and exhausted. My thoughts bounced from my mother's injury and impending surgery to the expression on Edward's face when I told him I had to leave. We didn't even get to enjoy saying 'I love you' for the first time to each other because it was only said out of desperation.

I slept fitfully on the flight to Phoenix. Whenever I reached the point of deep sleep, I was jerked awake by my subconscious. I knew if I fell asleep, I would wake up crying. It didn't matter what I did, Edward was in the forefront of my mind.

"Bella, we're here. Come on. They've got your mom at the hospital, but she refuses to go into surgery without seeing you first," Emmett spoke gently to me as he shook my shoulder. My eyes fluttered before opening up to see his sad smile. I felt my chest tighten, and my eyes stung with tears.

I was feeling sorry for myself while my mother was lying in a hospital bed with a horrific break to her leg. I missed my mother and I was excited to see her. I shook the sleep from my body and stood up to follow Emmett and Alice from the plane. Immediately after entering the luggage pick up area, my friends were glued to their cell phones. I stared at them as they both spoke animatedly with no signs of pain at leaving behind their summer affairs.

**EPOV**

Jasper was talking to Alice as Rosalie giggled over the line to Emmett. I hated them both. Neither of them had experienced what I had with Bella. They weren't in love. They were content to speak over the phone to one another and hope that maybe someday they would see each other again.

My heart was in my throat as I stared at my cell phone. My hands shook, and I felt my chest tightening the longer it took Bella to call me. I knew she wasn't intentionally leaving me hanging, but it still hurt. I didn't want to lose my connection to her. We had finally expressed our love and then we were violently torn apart. Life was so fucking cruel.

As my phone rang out from my hand, I jerked back into reality and quickly answered it. I knew it was Bella, and I felt my heart breaking even more at the sound of her exhausted voice.

"Hey, Edward," she sighed tiredly.

"Baby, are you okay?" I questioned ridiculously. I even rolled my eyes at myself.

"I guess I am. I mean, I got some sleep on the flight but not enough. My mom is already at the hospital, but she's refusing to allow the surgery until I get there. She's got this phobia of going into surgery and never coming back out." I could hear the sad smile in her voice. It torn at the gentle numbness I had allowed to engulf me.

"Have you told her about me?" It was a selfish question, and I knew that I shouldn't have asked.

"Of course I have," she laughed over the line. I was suddenly so thankful I had asked such an inappropriate question because it had caused the beautiful music of her laugh to fill my ear.

"What did you tell her about me?" I asked her conspiratorially. I was hoping to keep her spirits up. She needed to be in a good place when she greeted her mother.

"Well, I told her that you're gorgeous and that you're the sweetest guy I've ever met. I told her how we literally bumped into each other and that you were a true gentleman. I told her I love you," she finished in a whisper. My heart swelled at that comment.

"You told her you love me? But you only just told me, and if she got hurt… then you told her before," I concluded more to myself than her.

"Yes, I told her almost two weeks ago," she sighed softly. I cleared my throat and squeezed my eyes shut to stop the threatening tears. I didn't need Jasper or Rosalie to see me crying. I didn't want to seem pathetic.

"Bella… I miss you," my voice was low and husky from the unshed tears. It was such a painful experience for me. I didn't think I could ever feel something that hurt so damn much.

"I know. I miss you too, but I have to go. My phone is almost dead. I won't be able to call you tonight, but I'll call you tomorrow." The tears were evident in her voice. I wished I could pull her into a hug in that moment.

"I love you. I'll be dreaming of you tonight," I told her confidently.

"Love you too, Edward. And I've been dreaming of you every night since the day I ran into you at the grocery store. I'll talk to you tomorrow." She heaved a sigh before the line went silent. I looked at the phone and the line was still connected.

"You have to hang up first. I don't think I can," I whispered desperately. I couldn't disconnect myself from her.

"I can't either… please?" she was begging me to let her off the hook with this. I just didn't think I could let her go so quickly.

"I… Call me as soon as you can tomorrow?" I asked her.

"Absolutely," Bella responded to me. I heaved out a heavy sigh of my own and reluctantly closed the phone. I stared at the offending object for a few short minutes before Jasper interrupted my seething.

"Dude, are we going back to our normal ritual? Pizza and movie night?" Jasper asked nonchalantly. I wanted to wring his neck and hug him all at the same time.

"I think that's a good idea. I could use a distraction." I let a sad smile grace my lips and followed him out of the basement and out to his truck.

Rosalie, Jasper, and I tried to have a normal hangout, but it felt so empty without Bella there. My arms were empty and the seat next to me cold. My chest burned at every tiny action reminiscent of Bella. I would have much rather laid in my bed and felt sorry for myself, but I knew that Jasper would never allow it from me.

The night continued to drag as I stared at the clock waiting for a reasonable time to excuse myself from the awkwardness I found myself surrounded in. Rosalie and Jasper hadn't argued once during the entire movie. They were laughing together. On top of missing Bella, that only made the night more uncomfortable for me.

When Jasper's feet hit the table, I waited for the explosion from Rosalie, but it never came. She even lifted her feet to place them next to Jasper's. Then she leaned on him and continued to watch the movie like it was completely normal for the two of them to have a close sibling relationship.

"It's like the fucking Twilight Zone in here!" I cried out as I stood to my feet.

"What are you talking about, dude?" Jasper questioned without really looking up at me. He just continued to eat his popcorn and watch the movie on the screen.

"I'm talking about you two being pod people! You haven't argued once, and that's just nutty, but then Rose lays on you to watch a movie? When did this shit happen?" My frustration with Bella leaving me was coming out in my rant on my friends.

"We've always been close, Edward. I can't believe you think all we ever do is fight. I mean we're all upset over this whole turn of events so we're seeking comfort in each other." Rose shrugged as if it was a completely normal situation for the two of them.

"Alright, I think everyone has lost their minds. I'm going up to bed now. Please be normal by the time I get up in the morning." I drug my feet as I walked through the basement and up the two flights of stairs to my room. I didn't want to go to bed alone. I wanted to hold Bella like I had the night before.

**BPOV**

I walked into the hospital and was met by a lot of static background noise. I made my way to the nurse's station and questioned the nurse sitting at the desk about how to find my mother.

She was very sweet and gave me all the information I needed without any arguments. I loved her for that. I was tired and just wanted to get to my mother so she could get this surgery over with and stop using me as an excuse to put it off.

Upon entering the room the nurse had given me, I was shocked into silence. Phil sat with his head in his hands as my mother ran her fingers through his hair. Her face was a white the same shade as the hospital linens. I could see the sweat pouring from her that had drenched her gown.

"Shit, Mom, are you alright?" I gasped loudly once I found my voice and rushed over to her side. My mother looked up at me with a small grimace that I assumed was supposed to be a reassuring smile.

"Well, the doctors are getting pretty upset with me. An infection has set in and they have to allow a round of antibiotics before they can cut me open. Apparently the bone has injured a muscle in my leg." Renee looked away from me as she finished. I felt my fists curl up, and I wanted to hurt her in that moment. How could she be so stupid?

"You're an idiot, mother. Phil, how could you let her refuse this surgery?" I cried out into the room, but received no response. When I looked back at Phil, he was just shaking his head without removing it from his hands.

"Don't blame him, Bella. It was my decision. Anyway, I'll be fine. I might need a little physical therapy, but it's not like I'll need amputation." She waved her hand weakly before letting it fall to the bed. I heard Phil take in a sharp breath and this caught my attention.

"What is it?" I asked as I stared him down.

"If they can't stop the infection, considering the break was a good twelve hours ago, then amputation might be something they have to consider," Phil spoke softly still without lifting his head.

"Phil! Damnit, you weren't supposed to tell her that!" my mother chided, and I could see even more color draining from her complexion. She took a deep breath and let herself fall back into the bed.

"She deserves to know, Renee," Phil answered her. I could see how tired she was and really wanted a full report from a nurse or something.

"I'm going to get some caffeine. Would you like some, Phil?" I asked him with a resigned tone. I couldn't blame him. It was hard to talk any sense into my mother.

"That would be great, Bella." He finally looked up at me with a grateful little smile. As I left the room, I was in a state of shock. What the hell was wrong with her? She could lose her leg and she didn't even care all because she didn't want to go into surgery. Now she not only had a broken leg, but an infection on top of it.

"Do you need help ma'am?" a male nurse asked of me as I paced in front of the door to my mother's room.

"Yeah, I do, actually. Renee Dwyer is my mom; I'm just kind of wondering what's going on with her. She's not really telling me everything," I sighed and leaned back against the wall waiting for him to speak.

"Well, I can tell you this much. I'm not her nurse, and even if I was I couldn't really tell you anything. From what I know of your mother, she had a staph infection and because the break was so long ago, the bones have started to heal, so the bone will need to be rebroken and replaced once they clear up the infection." He smiled and walked away.

**EPOV**

"Hello?" I answered the phone groggily. I had fallen asleep and wasn't expecting any phone calls. I knew Bella would be at the hospital and my annoying ass friends were probably still in my basement.

"Edward? Were you sleeping?" Bella's soft voice came over the line. I sat straight up in bed and cleared my throat.

"Yeah, but I'm up now. I thought you were going to be at the hospital the rest of the day," I confusedly asked her. It wasn't that I was unhappy to hear from her it was just unexpected.

"I needed someone to talk to," she stated simply. I could tell there was more behind that statement, but I didn't want to push her into talking if she really wasn't up to it.

"Well, I'm definitely that person. What's up, baby?" I questioned her gently.

"So, yeah, my mom broke her leg, but she failed to mention the infection that could possibly cause a need for amputation," she rambled off sarcastically.

"Oh, god. Wow, Bella. I don't know what to say. Are you alright?" I hated the pity that seeped out through my voice. I wanted her to feel comforted, not pitied.

"I'm fine. They said that it's a good chance for nothing to happen but to be prepared. I'm just upset that she didn't even bother to mention it. If it hadn't been for Phil, I would never have known that it was a possibility. Sorry, I don't really want to talk about this. I miss you so much already." I could hear the tears in her voice as she sniffled. It broke my heart to hear it.

"I miss you too. This is hard," I whispered into the line. I desperately wanted to hold her.

"What are we going to do?" Bella asked in a small voice that again tore at my heart. I felt like it was being ripped from my chest.

"We're going to work around this. Make it work. I mean long distance relationships work all the time right?" I spoke as though I knew what I was talking about, but it just wasn't true.

"You know what would really cheer me up right now?" Bella's voice suddenly became very coy.

"Nope, I don't," I responded skeptically. If this was going where I was praying it could turn out fantastically.

"A kiss from you," she sighed sadly. I really wanted to feel her lips against mine. I stared ahead at my wall dreaming about the night before when everything between us was easy and perfect.

"Mwah," I pressed my lips against the phone in a kiss making a smacking sound. "Does that help?"

"Yes. That's so sweet," Bella giggled to me. I could tell she was smiling, and knowing that I could help her feel better even being so far away made my heart ache just a little bit less.

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**Would love to hear your thoughts!**


	11. Love Hurts

**A/N: TISSUE WARNING! Enjoy this installment! Thanks again to my ever awesome beta twilight-is-lovee.**

**Playlist:**  
_The Only Exception_ – Paramore  
_Decembers_ - Hawthorne Heights  
_I Need You Tonight_ – Backstreet Boys  
_I Drive Myself Crazy_ - 'N SYNC  
_Everytime_ - Britney Spears

* * *

**BPOV**

It was midnight on the seventeenth day I had been home. My mom's surgery had gone great. She was even trying to walk on her broken, screwed-together leg. I had only talked to Edward on the phone nine times. It wasn't nearly enough for me. I missed him.

Nights like the one I was having made it so much harder to be away from him. I couldn't sleep. My entire body ached for his touch… his scent… hell, even his _voice _at that point would have been heaven. Going three damn days without hearing his beautiful velvety voice was just pure hell.

Sure, we exchanged text messages and even spoke online, but it was never enough. The phone calls were never enough. I wanted his arms around me, his lips on my ear, his scent enveloping me in its cloud of comfort. Everyday away from him caused the physical ache in my chest to deepen.

"GOD DAMNIT!" I cried out of frustration into my room. I had been tossing and turning for hours. It was like this when I thought about him a lot. It made me miss him more than usual. I could feel the tears building in my eyes, but I squeezed them shut and fought them back. I promised myself that I wouldn't cry myself to sleep another night.

_Knock, Knock, Knock_; I heard the gentle tapping on my door before it was pushed open gently and my mother popped her head into the door.

"Are you okay, baby?" she questioned. I immediately jumped to my feet to help her stand until I saw that she was actually using her chair.

"I'm fine, Mom. You should be in bed. You know you need your rest," I sighed as I lowered myself back onto my bed.

"I heard you yell. What's the matter?" Renee asked again as she pushed my door open and wheeled herself into the room and right next to my bed.

"I miss him," I whispered as the tears broke through my barriers and started to run down my face. The light breeze from my open window caused the tears to cool against my heated skin and sent chills through my body.

"Baby, I know you miss him, but you knew you were going to be leaving at the end of the summer. It was only a few weeks sooner than we had planned. You know how I feel about this kind of thing. If it's meant to be, it will be regardless of the situation. That's how I got you. I was doing everything the way I should have… birth control and condoms. Everything happens for a reason, Bella." She ran her hand through my hair as I lay curled up on the end of my bed silently crying.

"I know that, but it doesn't make it hurt any less," I sniffled and rubbed my nose.

"Love hurts, baby girl. Try to get some sleep, okay? You can call him in the morning," Renee suggested while patting me on the back. I didn't respond to her as she left the room and softly shut the door behind her.

I crawled back into bed and curled into a fetal position. I stared at the wall by my bed, trying to focus on the color blue. I read in a book once that if you focus hard enough on a color, you can manipulate it in your head. Then you can use that manipulation and control to manipulate and control yourself, which could help you relax and get to sleep. I was desperate for any help.

Just as I could feel myself drifting off my cell phone rang out with a familiar tone of _The Only Exception _by Paramore. I loved when I heard that song playing. I flung the covers off of my legs and jumped across the room to my desk quickly opening my phone.

"Hey, Edward," I sighed breathlessly into the phone. I could hear his soft exhale and my heart sped up slightly in my chest.

"Hi, Bella. God do I miss you," he sighed, and my hand tightened on the phone.

"I miss you too. We have got to make it a point to talk at least once a day. It's hard enough not seeing you, but not hearing your voice is killing me inside," I confessed while I lay back on my bed. I couldn't contain the smile that was taking over my entire face.

"Fuck, I completely agree. I'm sorry I haven't called or answered lately. My dad's got me working at the hospital to occupy my time. He said that he couldn't stand me moping around the house all the time anymore," Edward laughed softly, and I felt the tightening in my chest loosen very slightly.

"Yeah, I just had that conversation with my mom. So if you're so tired, why are you up?" I was curious, considering it was after one in the morning.

"I couldn't stop thinking about you. I wanted to hear your voice… tell you I love you." He tried to be casual about it, but I could tell he was upset.

"I feel the same way. I can't sleep most nights because you've consumed my brain." I could feel the blush forming on my cheeks as I told him this little piece of information.

"When do you start back to school again?" he asked casually. I groaned at his choice of topics.

"Really, Edward? School? I start back in a week. My birthday is coming up," I shrugged my shoulders even though he couldn't see the gesture. I was hoping that he could convince his parents to let him visit for my birthday.

"I know, baby. I'm working on the perfect gift for you." His voice was sweet, and he sounded absolutely exhausted as he tried to stifle a yawn.

"You sound so tired. Maybe I should let you go and we'll talk tomorrow night," I suggested regretfully. I tried to hide the disappointment in my voice, but it came out loud and clear.

"No, I don't want to go yet. Can we just talk until one of us falls asleep? I want your voice to be the last thing I hear or think about before I pass out," Edward sweet-talked through another yawn. I just couldn't say no to him.

I held the phone to my ear as I listened to him breath for a moment. I could almost feel his breath against my skin, and it sent shivers through my body.

"Of course we can talk until you fall asleep. I know you'll go first anyway," I teased him. Edward laughed good-naturedly.

We talked about the most random things for about an hour before I started on the topic of my mom's recovery. I had been continuing a long story when I heard the first hint of a snore. I paused in my story to listen, and all I heard was breathing.

"Edward? You awake?" I questioned uselessly over the phone. I sighed as I heard a soft snore and a grunt come over the line.

I felt the tears well in my eyes and spill over despite the effort I put in to stop their flow. I held the phone to my ear like a lifeline as I listened to the love of my life sleep hundreds of miles away when he should have been lying right next to me.

"I love you, Edward," I whispered into the receiver. I heard a sleepy whisper of my name and mumbled words before the line went dead.

Tears poured down my face, and there was no stopping them. I took a deep breath, preparing for the broken sobs that always came after I spoke to him. It was a lose-lose situation for me. I felt better while I was talking to him, but the minute our conversation ended, it was like leaving him all over again and the feeling only got ten times worse for me.

I cried myself to sleep after an undetermined amount of time. I woke up with a scratchy throat and a headache, and my eyes were so puffy it looked like I was suffering from severe allergies. I decided that a shower was a brilliant idea before my mom saw how awful I looked. I wasn't exactly in the mood for another lecture from her about love and what it was like.

**EPOV**

I woke up with a stabbing pain in my neck. I groaned and reached up to rub my neck only for my hand to connect with cool metal. My brow furrowed in confusion as I gripped the offending object and held it in front of my face. My cell phone was open and it was stabbing me in the neck.

"Oh fuck! I fell asleep on her!" I cried out into my empty, lonely bedroom. I pressed the power button on my phone but nothing happened.

"Fucking battery died," I muttered to myself. I rolled out of bed and plugged in my phone before turning it back on. The light flashed on and showed me that it was almost noon and I had three messages.

I flipped through the new text messages with little interest once I saw that none of them were from Bella. I felt like crying and tearing my hair out. I missed her so fucking much. It was hard to breath with the weight that sat on my chest. All I could see when I closed my eyes was her shy smile and molten chocolate eyes. I could feel the sparks that always jumped between our bodies when we touched.

I hated going into work with my dad. He just didn't understand that I would rather mope around the house. I had been desperately trying to convince my parents that I was mature enough to fly out to Phoenix alone to see Bella for her birthday.

I didn't want to tell her and get her hopes up only to disappoint her if I couldn't come through. God, what I wouldn't give to just hold her hand in that moment as I stared at my phone praying to get something from her.

"Come on, Bella, I love you. Call me," I spoke to my phone. I knew I could have called her, but I didn't want to interrupt anything if she was busy. This was how it always was for me. I desperately wanted to talk to her, but felt guilty if I intruded on something.

After staring at my phone for twenty minutes and receiving nothing from Bella, I sighed and made my way into the shower. I had told Dad that I absolutely refused to go into the hospital today and that I wanted to spend time with Jasper. Although that was a complete lie, it definitely got him to let me off the volunteer hook. I had a feeling that some of the obsessive need to keep me busy was him trying to keep me out of Chief Swan's hair.

"Edward! Hi, honey! I was hoping you might sit with me for a few minutes so we can talk," my mom's cheery voice accosted me as I entered the kitchen for coffee.

"What do you need to talk to me about?" I questioned defensively.

"Your father and I talked. There are some things we discussed that I would like to talk to you about." She smiled at me. I felt my heart drop into my stomach as a horrible feeling engulfed my entire being.

"Just say whatever shitty news you stayed home to dish out, Mom. It's not like I could possibly feel much worse than I have since Bella left." I poured my coffee and kept my back to my mother as I prepared for whatever blow she was about to throw my way.

"Just sit down here and we'll talk, Edward." I could still here the smile in her voice, and it made me even more nervous. I sighed out of defeat and slumped into a chair at the table she was perched at.

"That's much better. Now your father and I were discussing the idea of you flying out to Phoenix for Bella's birthday, and…" I held up my hand and stopped her.

"I won't take no for an answer. I'll fucking jump on a bus if I have to Mom." I glared at her as I spoke.

"Let me finish! We think it's a bad idea for you to fly out there alone, Edward. We would feel much better if Jasper was with you." She lifted an eyebrow at me, and my mouth fell open in shock. I couldn't believe she was throwing that out there.

"You _know _that his parents won't let him fly out to Phoenix without one of them!" I cried out in rage. I could see the workings of my parent's conversation and how they knew that Jasper would never be allowed to go with me.

"Well, we've decided that you can't go alone. Both your father and I have to work so either of us going is impossible. Bottom line, sweetie, you can't go unless you find someone to go with you." Her smile faltered when our eyes met. She must have seen the heartbreak her words caused in my eyes. I felt like she had ripped my heart out of my chest and stomped on it.

"It's her birthday, Mom," I whispered uselessly.

"If it's meant to be, it will be," she spoke cryptically as she stood up and left me sitting in the kitchen staring at the table.

I headed over to Jasper's house for a much needed distraction. I needed to convince his parents that this was a life or death situation for me. The only question was how I would manage that in a believable way. Surely the Hales would contact my parents and they would express the truth. It irritated me to know that I couldn't get away with lying.

It was extremely upsetting to know I wasn't going to be able to visit Bella for her birthday. The situation was completely unfair. I just wanted to spend an important day with the girl I was in love with.

"Jazz, dude… we've got to do _something _to get you permission. Seriously, its Bella's fucking birthday. My parents are being serious assholes about this whole thing. Why can't they just understand it fucking hurts to be away from her," I complained as I barged into Jasper's bedroom.

"First of all, what do I need permission for? And what are your parents being assholes about?" The confusion in Jasper's expression reminded me that I hadn't had time to discuss my plans of flying out to Phoenix.

"Fuck… okay, I'll explain it. Bella's birthday is coming up, and I really wanted to fly out there and visit her. My parents said they needed to discuss it and this morning my mom drops the bomb on me that I need somebody to go with me otherwise I can't go. You would be the only person I could take," I muttered in annoyance. The more I thought about it, the more it pissed me off.

"That's hilarious that you think my parents would _ever _consider letting me fly out to Phoenix on a whim." He rolled his eyes at me and turned back to his computer.

"It's not on a whim. I'm desperate. I told you I'm in love with her. I know that you don't know Alice well or anything, but… Jazz, this shit is painful. It literally feels like a knife has been stabbed into my chest and it's slowly being twisted. It's hard to breathe without her," I sighed and stared at the ceiling.

"How did Edward Cullen get so damn attached in such a short amount of time?" Jasper shook his head and I took his question as rhetorical. We stayed in a companionable silence for a little while before Jasper spoke up again.

"Do you think that it's possible that you two are … too attached?" he mumbled quietly. I felt my face flush as my temper flared and I sat up straight on the bed, turning a heated glare on his shrunken form.

"You are such a jackass! Do you not understand what I'm telling you? It's not attachment… I'm in LOVE with her! I'm telling you when they say that love hurts, they're not kidding," I growled at him.

"I didn't mean to offend you, dude. It's just… maybe what they say about absence is true too… you know, that it makes the heart grow fonder and all that shit." Jasper shrugged it off and went back to his computer again.

He was making sense, but it pissed me off to realize he might be right about us being too attached. I mean, we hadn't known each other for that long. Maybe it wasn't love but infatuation. I shook that thought off and steeled myself to the fact that I knew what I was feeling wasn't just simple infatuation.

Jasper and I let the issue slid and he tried to come up with ways to get his parents to allow him to accompany me to visit Bella. We had an entire plan laid out when we walked down the stairs, but it crashed down on us before we even go the chance to try.

"Hey, Mom, can I ask a favor?" Jasper asked with his sweet charm as he sidled up to his mother at the sink and began washing the dishes as she rinsed.

"Esme already called me sweetheart. You know that your father and I can't possible let you run off to Phoenix without adult supervision." Charlotte sighed and dried off her hands. I felt my chest aching at her words.

"Please, Mom? I'll even take Rose with me. Edward said he'd pay for the tickets and everything we need. This is really important to him, Mom," Jasper looked back at me and gave me a sad smile. Charlotte turned to look at me before crossing the kitchen and pulling me into a hug.

"Edward, you know I love you like one of my own. I can see in your eyes how much you love her, but, sweetie, I just can't send Jazz and Rose to Phoenix unsupervised." She rubbed my back, but I shrugged her off and stared down at my feet.

"I understand," I rasped out, trying to hide the tears in my eyes. I needed to leave before I made a complete fool of myself. I nodded my head at Jasper and spun on my heel to leave the house without another word.

**BPOV**

He said he wouldn't be working, yet it was three in the afternoon and I still hadn't received so much as a text message from him. I lay in my bed staring at my ceiling, praying I would hear the song that meant he was calling me. I couldn't stand the thought of eating, so I had bypassed both breakfast and lunch. Renee had plenty of comments on that.

"Sweetie, you're losing weight. I swear you've dropped at least three pounds since you got back. It's not healthy. Please just eat something," my mother begged of me. I eyed the plate of eggs and sausage I had fixed for her and reflexively felt myself gag at the thought of eating anything.

"I'm not losing weight. My clothes all fit fine, Mom, and besides, I eat. I just don't always do it when you're around," I muttered into my mug. I hated coffee, but it was the only thing getting me through the day with only four hours of sleep a night.

"Baby, I'm your mother. I think I would know if something was up…. Wait, this is about Edward, isn't it? Isabella, you are not this kind of girl! I will not have you starving yourself over this boy! You're so young, Bella. This kind of obsession isn't good for either one of you." Renee sighed and set her fork down on the table then rolled herself over to me. I slumped back against the counter and refused to meet her probing gaze.

"Don't do this. I don't want to hear you tell me this isn't healthy and that it's wrong. You don't know how I feel. It hurts so badly, Mom. I just… please let this one go. If what you say is true then it will run its course, right?" I grumbled up to the ceiling. I heard her click her tongue and roll away, but she didn't comment further.

After that disastrous conversation, I locked myself away in my room. I just wanted to be alone and wallow in my self-pity for a while. As I stared at the ceiling, I let thoughts of our last night together wash over me.

My chest started to ache and my eyes burned as I begged for the pain to stop. I cried out in frustration when the hole in my chest tore open once again and my tears ran from my eyes, down my cheeks and fell against my ears then dripped onto my hair. The sobbing was absent, but the void in my chest felt fresh as I wept silently.

Thinking about the expression on Edward's face when I told him I had to leave burned my throat as the bile fought to come up. I hated that feeling. Why should being without someone cause physical illness on top of the emotional debilitation it produced?

I eventually cried myself to sleep that afternoon, thinking of the passion and love Edward showed me the night I stayed with him. When I closed my eyes, I could almost feel his hands on me. The dreams these thoughts provoked were so real that when my phone rang, my heart lurched and a fresh torrent of tears broke through. I desperately need that dream to be real.

When I realized the song that was coming from my phone was Edward's ring tone, I catapulted from the bed to my desk and quickly flipped it open to answer.

"Edward, what took you so long?" I gasped into the phone. My breath was heavy from frustration and sleep.

"I didn't want to bug you or anything. I felt like I would be imposing, but… I couldn't stand it anymore," he sighed over the line. I could just picture him laying back on his bed with his eyes pinched shut and his free hand tugging at his hair in frustration.

"You would never bug me. You can call me anytime of the day and I'll answer it if I can. I love you and talking to you is what I wait for all day," I confessed pathetically.

"Why didn't you call me then?" he questioned me and I felt silly for my reasons.

"I thought you might have gone to work with your dad anyway and I didn't know if you'd answer. I hate listening to your voicemail." I cleared my throat and wiped my face as I attempted to compose myself.

"You shouldn't worry about that shit. I told you I wasn't going in with him today. Besides, I love getting messages from you. I've been waiting all day for you to call. I have some bad news." His voice was softer and sounded farther away as he ended his statement.

"What bad news?" My interest was officially peaked and I cocked my head in curiosity though I knew he couldn't see me.

"I won't be coming to visit for your birthday. My parents are being ridiculous about it. They said I had to bring somebody with me, and Jasper is my only friend. His parent shot down the idea before we even had the opportunity to try asking them.

"Oh." I couldn't hide my disappointment. All my composure left me as the new wave of tears filled my eyes, blurring my vision, and ran down my face. I tried to keep the tears silent, but a few hiccups and sobs left my chest.

"Bella, I'm sorry. I really tried. I hate this shit," Edward growled into the phone. I could hear him muttering under his breath and my tears came faster.

"Not your fault… can I call you back in a little while? I need a shower," I whispered into the line through the tears. I was trying to conceal the pain in my voice as much as possible.

"No, Bella, talk to me, please?" he begged quickly, but I shook my head as I answered.

"I'll call you back." With that, I hung up my phone and slid to the floor against my bed. The wailing sobs began again and I let them rip through me without trying to suppress them. My hopes of having him hold me and feeling his lips upon mine were completely shattered and the shards of my heart were lying on the floor with that hope.

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**I would love to hear what you think.**


	12. Bad Company

**A/N: I wanna apologize for my severe lack of updating this story. Real life kinda came and bit me. I found out around Christmas last year that my father had stage 3 lung cancer. It was a lot of family stuff but I'm back working hard to finish this story. I'm so sorry to those of you that read and enjoyed it but life tends to happen when we aren't expecting it!**

**Playlist:**  
_SOS_– Rihanna_  
Down_ – Jay Sean ft. Lil Wayne  
_Baby_ – Justin Bieber  
_Anthem of Our Dying Day_ – Story of the Year  
_Always_ - Saliva

* * *

EPOV

After I had told Bella I wasn't going to see her on her birthday, she withdrew from me almost completely. When we talked on the phone, the conversations were short and felt stiff to me. She requested we start using an online chat service, and this made me completely nervous because I missed hearing her voice.

Upon voicing my concerns that we were drifting apart, Bella stated that school starting was taking up a lot of her time. She assured me that she missed me and that she loved me, but something felt very wrong in our conversations. I had to find a way to see her, but I didn't see any possibilities in the near future unless she managed to make it back to Forks.

I missed her immensely. The thought of pressing my lips against hers sent me into a horny frenzy. Pleasuring myself wasn't cutting it, and I desperately needed her attention. I decided that the next time we talked I was going to ask her for her help in some way. Just hearing her voice while I jerked off was sure to make a huge difference for me.

I was coming out of the shower two nights before her birthday when she called me, and I just couldn't take it any longer. I grabbed my phone and took a few deep breaths to prepare myself for what I was about to ask of her.

"Hey baby," I cooed into the phone. I could hear her excitement over the line as soon as she spoke to me.

"I fucking love you, you know that? The bracelet is beautiful… and it's perfect. Thank you, Edward," she squealed into the phone. I grinned widely at her reaction. The bracelet I sent her was a charm bracelet with both our birthstones and the date we met set in elegant white gold, as she had expressed to me how much she hated yellow gold. I realized in those moments just how much I missed the joy our conversations brought us both.

"I'm glad you like it so much, and I love you too. I'm so sorry I can't be there this weekend but I wanted to give you something else… if you're up for it?" I suggested cryptically knowing she wouldn't expect what I was about to suggest.

"And what do you mean by if I'm up for it?" she questioned me with humor in her tone.

"I need you, Bella. I can't… I need your help with something," I whined huskily into the line. My towel was on the floor already, and I had climbed into my bed naked with my dick already hard as a rock.

"Umm… what do you need my help with?" Bella's question now was laced with obvious confusion.

"I kinda feel silly asking this, but… I want to have… um… phone sex with you. Before you answer, just hear me out please," I begged suddenly realizing how strange my request sounded.

"Talk… I'm not sure what… that entails," she whispered over the line. I could feel her nervousness through the line and I sighed quietly.

"I want you to talk me through… help me get off. Like maybe play with yourself for me… let me hear you moan. Just so I can imagine it's me creating those reactions in you. I want to hear you moan… it will make things so much better for me," I explained with my own nervousness filling the air.

"Edward… I don't know... it sounds a little uncomfortable to me. I don't know if I can do that," Bella's voice was so sweet and innocent sounding.

"Please, Bella. I love you. I really need this," I begged again. My whole body was on fire just picturing her next to me. I couldn't imagine what hearing her moans would do for me.

"I… what am I supposed to do?" she asked me, and I felt incredibly excited by her possible acceptance of my idea.

"We'll start of slow, okay? Why don't you tell me what you're wearing?" I could hear the deep, husky quality of my voice so I knew that she could detect the change easily.

"Um… I'm wearing jeans and a light blue tank top," she spoke nervously and this only made me smile. She was getting wound up and would definitely need the release I was hoping to provide.

"What are you wearing underneath that baby?" I encouraged her to keep talking and open up.

"The same bra and panty set I wore the night we had sex," she responded with slightly less hesitation.

"Mmm… you mean the sexy lace one that I wanted to tear off of you the second it came into view?" My hand unconsciously moved down my stomach and rubbed against my painful erection.

"That's the one. Um… what are you wearing?" And as she asked, I could picture the bright red blush that had to be coloring her cheeks in that moment and it only served to turn me on more.

"I'm naked Bella," I whispered into the receiver so it would be like I was right at her ear. I heard the sexy little gasp that left her lips then.

"Oh… wow. I wish I could see that." She giggled when she responded, and I decided to dive in even further.

"Take off your clothes for me, baby," I breathed heavily into the phone as my free hand wrapped about around my dick. I sighed in pleasure at the feel of some kind of friction.

"I don't know… I'm nervous," Bella admitted, and I knew she was just crimson red sitting on her bed.

"God… please, Bella. I know it's a strange request, but… I'm so horny, and I miss you so fucking much. Just hearing your voice turns me on… can you imagine what hearing you pleasuring yourself could do for me?" I groaned desperately over the line.

"Okay… but… I'm not sure I'll be good at this," she sounded so self-conscious and terrified of the action. Her innocence only fueled me further into my quest.

"All you have to do is touch yourself… I'll talk you through it, Bella," I encouraged her. I heard her sigh and then the soft sounds of fabric moving came over the phone. My eyes closed and I was accosted with the image of Bella completely naked standing before me.

"I'm naked now, Edward. Tell me what to do," she whispered her request and my hand tightened over my aching cock as I whimpered into the line.

"Run your free hand up over your stomach and play with your tits. Do it like I would; just make it feel good," I whispered into the line. There was silence from the other line, and I worried about her hanging up on me. "Baby, are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm nervous. I don't know what to say." Bella's voice was soft and sweet as she responded to me.

"Just tell me what you're doing or how it feels for you." I could hear the fact that my words were raspy and they were deep. My hand tightened and rubbed up and down my length as I heard her release a soft moan.

"I'm… rubbing my right breast and… pinching my nipple. It feels… really good," she stuttered out. The image of her face all flushed red in her embarrassment turned me on even more. I could practically feel the heat of her skin beneath my hands.

"God… I miss you so much, Bella. I wish it was me touching you right now. I swear I'll make this lost time up to you," I groaned out as I heard her panting. It was almost as if I could feel her hot breath against my ear, and it sent chills throughout my body causing a violent shiver to run through me.

"I'll hold you to that," Bella whispered into my ear before a soft moan left her lips. I could just picture her biting that perfectly plump lower lip to contain her sounds. "I want you to fuck me," she stated confidently out of nowhere.

"Oh God, please tell me what you're doing," I begged her in desperation. I knew I wasn't going to last long, but I wanted every detail I could manage to pull from her.

"Mmm… I'm rubbing my fingers through my folds, spreading my wetness all over… Now I'm pushing one finger slowly inside of me." I could hear her voice changing as she spoke and her breath caught in her throat.

"Damn, my dick is so hard for you, Bella." I whimpered my statement because my erection was starting to become painful. I began moving my hand up and down faster and tighter trying to reach my release before the pain became unbearable.

"Close your eyes, Edward; imagine it's my hand working you as two of your fingers now slide inside of me. My walls begin to tighten around your fingers and your thumb presses hard against my clit as my hips buck up into your hand all while I'm still working your cock with my hand," Bella spoke softly and her voice was deep and raw over the line. I felt my stomach tighten and knew my release was only moments away.

"Fuck I hope you're going to cum soon because I need you to cum with me, baby," I grunted as I heard Bella cry out and gasp loudly in my ear.

"I'm cumming, Edward! Fuck!" Bella screamed out to me and my release took hold of my as my own cry of her name and several curses flew from my mouth. I laid still panting heavily with my eyes closed as I gripped the phone tight enough to hear the plastic groaning in protest.

"Thank you, Bella. That was fucking amazing," I breathed out as I felt my eyelids begin to droop. I was so fucking tired and I had forgotten that fact until that exact moment.

"It certainly was. You're welcome. God… I wasn't sleepy before I got on the phone with you," she giggled and yawned in my ear. My entire body relaxed even more after hearing that beautiful giggle that I loved so much.

"I love you, baby, but I'm exhausted and I think you are too. We'll talk tomorrow night regardless of everything else going on around us." I pressed a kiss to the speaker of the phone not the least bit worried about how corny it was.

"I love you too. I'll talk to you tomorrow. Goodnight," she sighed happily as she made the kiss noise back at me. I hung up my line because I knew that if I didn't hang up then, Bella and I would be fighting over the first person to hang up.

That conversation instilled a new hope in me, and my heart felt much lighter than it had in weeks. Jasper had invited me to a party that Saturday night, but I happily declined his invite because Bella and I had a webcam date for her birthday. I couldn't wait to see her right there in real time. The thought was exciting, and I had so much planned for it.

BPOV

I had to see him. I kept pulling away from him because it hurt so much just to think about him and when we talked… it nearly killed me. Then he asked me for phone sex and it was incredible. I missed him so damn much. I cried for the rest of the night after Edward hung up. I couldn't sleep regardless of how tired I was. It all just fucking hurt so badly.

The next day I decided to talk to my mom about making a weekend visit for my birthday. It was all I really wanted at that point in time and I prayed that she would agree.

"Just hear me out, Mom. I love him. You may think this is puppy love or whatever but it physically hurts to be away from him. I feel like my chest it collapsing all the time," I whimpered as my hands grabbed at my chest and stared at my mom.

"You have to call your father and ask him about it though I'm sure he'd love to have you," my mom sighed and patted my shoulder before rolling her wheel chair away.

"Wait… that's it? You're going to let me go?" I questioned in my shocked state of mind. My mom smiled at me and rolled right beside me.

"I can see the change in you, sweetie. I can feel the pain radiating off of you. It's like somebody close to you died and it's quite depressing. I love you, and the last thing I want is for you to suffer." She ran her fingers through my hair, and I pulled her into a tight hug.

I ran out of the room and called my dad and we made flight reservations together. I thought about telling Edward I was coming but decided I'd prefer it to be a surprise. I did have to call him and tell him I wouldn't be able to make it our webcam date scheduled for that Saturday. I felt horrible lying to him, but I decided it would be worth it. I was leaving on Saturday morning and would be coming home Sunday night. It was an expensive flight, but my parents were generous about it.

I made the dreaded phone call to Edward on Friday evening. I knew I shouldn't have waited, but I just hated to upset him. My heart broke as I lied and told him he wouldn't be seeing me on Saturday.

"I'm sorry, Edward! Apparently, my mom planned some mother/daughter weekend for us to celebrate my birthday. I didn't know! I really want to have this date on Saturday, but I'm not going to be around," I whimpered through the words because I knew that he was going to be quite pissed off at me.

"It's not your fault, Bella. I understand that parents do these things, but… I was just really looking forward to seeing you. I miss you. I know that the webcam isn't like really seeing you or holding you, but… fuck. I just need to see you. It's the closest thing I'm going to get to being next to you until the holidays." Edward let out a resigned sigh and I fought back my tears of frustration. I should have just told him I was coming to visit, but Alice told me that was a stupid idea and it would be better to surprise him.

"I know that. I'm upset about this too. I wish there were something I could do about it." I tried to comfort him, but it didn't seem to help at all.

After an hour-long conversation about how disappointed we both were over missing our webcam date, I finally told Edward that I had to get off the phone because I had to pack. I hated not talking to him, but I just couldn't stand hearing how upset he was. I knew that if I had stayed on the line I would have cracked and told him that I was coming to visit him.

I packed my bag and paced the room nervously. My stomach churned as the clock ticked. For some strange reason I was completely terrified of seeing Edward again regardless of how excited I was. It totally didn't make since to me but that was the best way to describe all the emotions flowing through me.

"Come on, Bella! You know security takes forever, and if we don't leave now then we're going to be late!" Mom called up to be around noon the next day. The little bit I had slept was completely useless and I was jittery but sluggish all at the same time. It felt like I was on some sort of drug and I just followed along onto stepping outside into the warm September air. I was going to see Edward.

"EEEEEEEEEEEE!" I squealed out in the most embarrassingly Alice maneuver that I had ever experienced. My mother stared at me for a minute along with Phil before they both just shook their heads and exchanged small smiles.

EPOV

Seven fucking o'clock and I was trashed. I had decided that I would take Jasper up on his party invite since apparently my Saturday night plans with Bella weren't as important to her as they were to me. I stared at the clock on the wall just waiting for the thing to explode into tiny pieces from the intensity of my glare.

"Dude, Edward, fucking relax. So you don't get to whack it to your girl masturbating tonight… there's always tomorrow." Jasper's hand clapped on my shoulder during his rant and he burst into hysterical laughter. Now I was normally the same type of happy drunk, but my loneliness and feelings of betrayal just made a depressed and whiny drunk.

"Shut up, Jazz! I fucking miss her. It's her damn birthday and I don't even get to talk to her!" I whimpered before grabbing the bottle of Jager and throwing back at least two shots worth of the liquid. It burned all the way down, but I welcomed the pain. That felt better than the constant ache that plagued my chest in the recent weeks.

"You obviously need more to drink, Eddie." Jasper hiccupped and stumbled back into the living room to join the loud music and inappropriate fucking-with-clothes-on shit that they all referred to as dancing.

I continued to drink until the bottle of Jager was empty. I stared at the bottom of the bottle through the opening and cursed the liquor for letting me down just like everything else in my life. I growled at it and then threw the bottle to the ground. The sound of shattering glass made me grin in satisfaction. I decided that I needed to finish another bottle to hear that again… no use in wasting the alcohol, right?

I was too drunk to know what bottle of liquor I had grabbed next. I continued to take large swigs of the foul tasting, fiery liquid until I couldn't stomach any more. I had a sudden urge to pee so I stood from the table and had to grab it again to steady myself. It was like all the alcohol had hit me at once and my vision blurred. I shook my head from the fog and made my way to the bathroom to take a piss.

When I got in there it was like I was pissing for hours, it just wouldn't stop coming out. I stood and whistled as I released myself and heard a soft gasp which caused me to jump and hit the toilet seat, wall and floor with my piss before I could get my aim back. I looked toward the door and there was this little brunette standing there blushing like crazy as she gaped at me.

I stared hard at her and my whole body reacted the instant I made the connection. It was fucking Bella! I had forgotten to luck the bathroom door but even through my fuzzy drunk haze she was beautiful.

"Fuck Bell… how are you here? Mmm… I don't fucking care. Come on and I'll make you cum baby. Love you," I mumble as I grabbed her hand and lead her into the first room I could find.

She didn't talk to me but she started kissing my neck and running her tongue along my ear and grinding herself into me. I pushed her back against the bed and clumsily ripped my shirt over my head before shoving my pants over my ass. My Bella undressed as I swayed on my feet. Once her clothes were gone she yanked me on top of her and grabbed my dick. I groaned out loudly.

"Fuck yes… touch me. Just… mmm fucking need this," I grunted while removing her hand from my dick. I fumbled on the floor for my wallet that held my one condom and failed miserably.

"Let me," her voice was husky and there was something unfamiliar about it. I couldn't concentrate long enough to think about it, but the condom was quickly on me and I was rubbing against her to prepare her when I heard the door open

"Edward? Are you in... WHAT THE FUCK?!" my angel's voice screamed out. The blood in my veins froze and it felt like someone had poured a bucket of ice water over me. The fog lifted and I looked into the face of my Bella but she wasn't underneath me she was standing in the doorway.

"Who the hell are you?" the brunette questioned with disgust as she covered her chest from Bella. I gaped like a fish as I took in the person below me that I had never met before. I looked from her to Bella and back again without switching positions. My hard on had long since died and my buzz had completely evaded me.

"I'm his mother fucking girlfriend! Who the fuck are you?" I could hear the tears and pain in the way Bella's voice cracked on the yell. I quickly jumped of the bed and threw the condom across the room before tossing my clothes on.

"Baby… I don't know what's going on but I've had a lot to drink and I…" I tried to speak but Bella smacked me and her eyes burned into mine.

"You fucking _bastard_! Don't you fucking baby me! I could... fucking _kill_ you right now! I just flew all the way here!" The tears were streaming down her face as she yelled. I suddenly felt the need to vomit. It wasn't just the liquor but the fact that I was so close to fucking some random chick. I begged Bella with my eyes as my hand clamped over my mouth and I bolted for what I prayed was the bathroom.

"You… you… you… asshole! Fuck, that isn't even enough! You piece of fucking dog shit! AHHH! I _hate_ you! Don't fucking call me! I don't exist as far as you're concerned!" Bella screamed at me through my vomiting in the toilet. The tears that filled my eyes as she continued to curse and insult me as she screamed at me while I vomited were not those that normally accompanied the force of emptying your entire system. They were tears of pain because I knew I fucked up, and I knew that I had lost her.

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**I would love to hear from you all!**


	13. Passionately Yours

**Playlist:**  
_It's Not Over_ – Secondhand Serenade  
_My Happy Ending_ – Avril Lavigne  
_Tourniquet_ – Evanescence  
_Rolling In The Deep_ - Adele_  
Without You_ - Hinder  
_Untitled_ – Simple Plan

* * *

**EPOV**

"Please," I begged though my retching. The tears streamed down my face as I held onto the sides of the toilet and whimpered.

"FUCK YOU EDWARD! How many other fucking girls have you been screwing around with since I left?! Was all this shit just an act for you?!" Bella screamed at me. I looked up momentarily between my retches and caught a painful glimpse of her face. Her eyes were red and puffy as tears flowed like a river down her cheeks which were bright red. Her lips quivered as she glared at me and her hands were twisting together in irritation.

"Bella, please," I moaned desperately before another round of retching took over. My entire body ached. Seeing her so hurt only made me feel sicker.

"What are you begging for? You expect me to _forgive_ what I just walked in on? Are you fucking insane Edward?! You said you loved me! You're a god damn liar! I can't believe this shit!" she growled before walking closer to me.

"You don't understand! I thought she was you! I've had so much to fucking drink…. God… please just… let's talk about this," I groaned as I tried to fight off the continued urge to vomit.

"And you think that you deserve a chance to talk about this? You were going to _fuck_ her!" Bella's voice cracked and she gripped the bathroom counter.

"I love you. Don't do this. We can fix this," I whimpered pathetically once again before my body revolted against me and the heaving commenced. I don't know how long the episode lasted but I was suddenly struck by a searing pain in my side. I gasped and grabbed at it causing my head to smack the toilet seat hard.

"That was for fucking around on me. Goodbye you asshole. Thanks for nothing you… you… you virtue stealing piece of shit!" Bella pulled her leg back again but I curled into a ball causing her blow to hit my leg and stopping me from receiving another hard blow to my side.

"Oh god," I gasped out as new tears sprang forth and spilled down my cheeks. I watched from my fetal position on the floor as Bella stomped angrily out of the bathroom door. My chest felt like it was going to explode and my entire body was aching. I didn't move from my spot on the floor next to the toilet.

**BPOV**

My heart stopped when I took in the sight of Edward hovering naked above some girl. He was so close to pushing inside of her. My heart shattered into little pieces at the image and it took all I had to avoid collapsing on the floor in pain.

I screamed at him and kicked him but it didn't make me hurt any less. I gave him everything I had to give but it still wasn't enough. He was just like every other guy I had ever met. Once he got what he wanted he moved on. It was obvious to me then that Edward had been toying with me the entire time.

When I stormed out of the bathroom I didn't make it very far before the emotions took over and I collapsed against a wall. My body shook with the force of my sobs as I slide down to the floor. I wrapped my arms around my legs and buried my head into my knees. I wailed loudly and allowed the tears to run freely over my face and soak my legs. I hurt in ways I didn't know were possible. It didn't matter to me that there were people everywhere and they were probably staring at me I just needed to release some of the painful pressure.

"Um… are you okay?" a hesitant voice asked me. I looked up at the voice and noticed a tall brunette with green eyes and big glasses looking down on me.

"Yeah," I croaked out. I rolled my eyes at myself and looked away from the girl.

"I'm Angela… you look like you could use a friend," I heard her slide down on the wall opposite me.

"I'm Bella. I need a lot more than a friend," I tried to stay calm and hold back my tears but they came anyway and a new round of painful crying and hiccupping began.

"Would you like a ride home? I was just leaving," Angela questioned quietly. I shook my head slightly but let out a sigh.

"I have my truck here but thank you," I sniffed some and wiped my eyes with the back of my sleeve. I felt pathetic and my head was pounding as a result of my crying.

"Do you need anything? Did something happen… you know… that you should… uh…" she stumbled over her words and I made the connection in my mind of what she thought had happened. I was at a teenage party full of drunken people and crying my eyes out as I sat on the floor in a short skirt, heels and a top that showed off my cleavage.

"No, no. Nothing like that happened. I just… I caught my boyfriend with another girl," I whispered. A new hole ripped through my chest as the tears came again. I wanted so badly to turn back time and be at home in that moment.

"Oh sweetie, come on. Let's get you out of here," Angela clucked her tongue as she grabbed my elbow to pull me up to my feet. She walked me down the hall and through the crowd before she stopped in front of a short, black haired guy with glasses and pretty blue eyes.

"Ben, will you follow me in your car over to Bella's? She's having a bad night and she probably shouldn't drive," Angela asked the boy with glasses.

"Sure babe. Hi Bella, I'm Ben," he reached his hand out for mine but my chest constricted at his pet name for Angela and a new flood of tears began to pour from me. I gasped and lifted my hands to cover my face.

"Like I said, bad night, just follow us okay?" Angela instructed before she pulled on me again. I attempted to compose myself as she pulled me outside of the house. I took a few deep breaths of fresh air and it helped some to clear my head.

"Thank you Angela but really, I can drive home. I haven't had anything to drink," I wasn't trying to be rude I just didn't want her to go out of her way for me.

"Nonsense, you may not have had anything to drink but you are in no state to drive right now. I know you don't know me but I couldn't live with myself if you left here and something happened to you because of your emotional state at the moment," Angela then reached out her hand for my keys. I sighed and complied with her request before pointing out my truck.

Angela drove me through town and to my house without even needing any directions. I would have been more suspicious if I wasn't so tired. I just gave her a look with one raised eyebrow in question of her knowledge.

"Um… you're Chief Swan's daughter… right?" she asked sheepishly. I could almost hear her telling herself she should have asked me that before pulling into my driveway like she had known me for years.

"Yeah, I am," I sighed and opened my door. Angela followed suit and handed over my keys.

"Listen… whoever he is, he's not worth all those tears, no man is," she stated before turning and walking to Ben's car that was idling at the end of the drive way. I didn't even get to thank her for the help.

I burst through the door and ran up the stairs without greeting Charlie. I was fighting back the scream building in the back of my throat. I could hear him calling out for me but I couldn't stop to listen. I headed from the bathroom and slammed the door before locking it and leaning heavily against it. I felt my head spinning and my stomach churning as the image of Edward hovering naked over that girl flooded my mind.

I let out a loud scream-whimper like noise before picking up the first thing I could get my hands on and throwing it across the room. I heard the loud clatter and felt somewhat mollified with the sound. My stomach twisted and I decided I needed a shower to wash away all the pain. I jumped into the steamy water fully clothed and began removing the offending articles that I swore I was going to burn.

"Isabella Marie Swan! Answer me or I'm breaking down the damn door!" Charlie roared as he pounded on the door. I paused in my removal of clothing to stare at the door. How long had he been screaming and pounding on it while I hadn't noticed?

"I'm taking a shower Dad," I called out pathetically. I knew that wouldn't be enough but I thought I could try.

"Isabella, what did that boy do to you?" his voice was a menacing growl and I felt chills of fear slither up my spine. I didn't want him to kill Edward.

"We had a fight and I'm upset. Just leave me to wallow in peace, please," I begged him. I was desperate to wash away the entire experience so I could fall asleep and pretend it was all a horrible nightmare.

**EPOV**

"Mother fucker," I groaned as my eyes fluttered against a harsh light. My entire body ached including the worst of it in my stomach and head. I had the worst dream the night before and felt like I hadn't slept at all. I had dreamed that Bella showed up and caught me almost fucking some chick. It made me sick just remembering it.

"Hey shit head. Get the fuck up. I can't believe you slept in the fucking bathroom last night," Jasper's voice filled the room and it echoed against the tiles. I grabbed my head and groaned.

"Can you like whisper or something? My head is fucking killing me and I had a killer nightmare," I groaned and sat up slowly so I wouldn't get sick.

"I can imagine you think last night was a nightmare. The whole party heard Bella screaming and cussing your ass out. What the fuck were you thinking dude?" Jasper kept his voice loud and kicked at me. It took a minute for my hung-over mind to process what he had just said.

"I didn't…" I gasped as the memories of what I thought were a dream raced through my head. I felt sick again and leaned over the toilet only to have a round of painful dry heaves.

"You so did. I know you were drunk but fuck… I thought you loved that girl. I never expected you to get it on with some random chick because you were lonely," Jasper shook his head and helped to lift me off the floor.

"Oh god… she fucking hates me," I whimpered and hung my head in shame before Jasper's words again registered a little late. "Wait a second you ass, I didn't fuck anybody last night. I came close to it but only because I fucking thought she was Bella. In my drunken haze that was all I could see. Thank god Bella came in when she did. She's never going to forgive me or even let me attempt to explain," I finished my argument but it all sounded pathetic to my ears. I knew there was no excuse for my behavior. I didn't deserve her forgiveness.

"What's there to explain? How are you going to explain away that she _saw_ you with your dick practically inside of another girl? It doesn't matter how drunk you were or what you thought at the time Edward. If this could happen once then it could certainly happen again," Jasper's statement was so simple. I knew he wasn't trying to be a condescending asshole and that he was only giving me his honest opinion but it still made me want to punch him.

"I didn't want to be with that girl. Bella has to understand. Jazz, I _love_ her. That word isn't even strong enough but it's the only thing I have. It physically hurts be to be away from her and now knowing that I've most definitely ruined everything… fuck," I felt the tears come back and my body shook with the force of all the emotions flowing through me. Jasper gripped my arm tightly as I swayed on my feet and continued to lead me out to his car.

"I wish I knew how to help you out with this one Edward," the sympathy radiating from him made the ache in my chest even worse. I didn't want sympathy… I wanted someone to tell me it was all a really bad dream.

The entire drive home was filled with a tense silence. My head was pounding and I felt like complete shit. My chest was aching and my stomach was queasy. I stared out the window as I contemplated what I would say to Bella; that is if she would even talk to me.

When Jasper parked outside of my house I didn't want to get out. I knew my mother would be pissed that I had been out all night and even more pissed to realize that I had gotten drunk. She was probably pacing a hole in the floor by now.

"You've got to face the music at some point. It's better to get it over with," Jasper nudged my shoulder and I turned to look at him. I couldn't mask the pain and fear in my eyes. I was quite afraid of my mother but I knew she would be ridiculously disappointed in me. I was more terrified that I had lost Bella forever because of my stupidity.

**BPOV**

I lay in my bed the entire night and next morning suffering through painful bouts of body wracking sobs. I would cry and scream into my pillow until my head pounded and my throat was raw then I would enter a numb period where my body would recoup itself only for me to start the entire crying and screaming process once my energy was restored.

Charlie came up to try and get me to eat breakfast but I kept my head facing away from him and declined. I wasn't hungry and just the thought of putting anything into my stomach made me feel sick. My head felt heavy and throbbed with the worst migraine I had ever experience which was only enhanced when I went into a fit.

"Damn it Bells, your flight leaves at five. We need to leave at three. You still haven't told me what's going on and you refuse to eat. I know something bigger than a fight happened last night. Tell me so I stop thinking the worst!" Charlie begged me from behind my closed and locked door.

"It's fine Dad. I'll be ready to go at three I promise. Just… let me be. I'll eat before we leave. I don't want to talk about it," I started my sentence out strong but my voice wavered and the tears pooled in my eyes as I finished speaking. I knew that Charlie could hear the pain and tears in my voice but I didn't have the energy to care. It felt like someone literally reached into my chest and yanked my heart out.

"That's not good enough. I'm going over there and that boy is going to tell me what the hell happened since you refuse to!" I heard Charlie stomp away from my door and down the stairs. I normally would have run after him to stop him but at that point I hoped he really hurt Edward for me.

My sobs and screams of frustration into my pillows must have covered up the surrounding sounds because I didn't hear the feet on the stairs or the soft knocks on my door or even the jimmying of my lock. I didn't know anyone was in my room until the hand touched my shoulder and swept my hair over my shoulder. I jumped at the contact and spun to glare at Edward. I would know the electricity his touch produced anywhere.

"Bella please hear me out," his voice was thick and raspy as I took in his disheveled appearance and blood shot eyes.

"No. You need to leave. I don't want to start a scene with my father just a floor below us. I _hate _you Edward. I don't want to see you. I told you to leave me the hell alone!" I whimpered and turned away from him. I couldn't look at him, it hurt too much.

"I know you hate me now. I just want to explain what happened. Bella, I was really depressed about not seeing you. I went out to that party to get wasted and forget. I thought that girl was you. I was fucked up. I was pissing and she came in… I know it's not an excuse and I'm fucking sorry! I love you please Bella…" he begged me with a shaky voice.

"I don't care. I can't fucking deal with this. God… I love you so fucking much it hurts but I won't do this. Just leave. We live so far apart and we can't see each other. Obviously the distance is too much for you. I'm leaving at three for the airport… I won't be back here for the holidays. I'm having Charlie come to me. Don't call. Don't e-mail. It hurts too much. Goodbye Edward," I finished my statement off and it took everything in me to stay looking at the window.

"I'll leave but this isn't the end. I love you and I won't let you go like this Bella," I heard the door creak and click as he shut it when he left. I listened closely to his steps clunking down the stairs and when I heard the faint sound of the front door closing I let myself collapse. A fresh wave of tears poured from me as I fell to my knees and hugged my stomach tightly.

This wave of torrential pain lasted twenty minutes. When it was over I was left gasping for breath and my head was spinning. I couldn't see straight and I felt like I would be sick. I forced myself to my feet and made it into the bathroom where I proceeded to dry heave for a few minutes. I decided then that I need a shower to wash it all away and move on from the aches.

Upon completing my shower I entered my room to find Edward sitting on my bed. I gasped and squeezed the towel tighter around me. I felt sick again and my head pounded. Why wouldn't he just leave me alone?

"Just… listen please?" he begged with a raw, hoarse voice. I leaned back against my door and stared down at my feet while trying to avoid his gaze. The little I saw told me he had been crying because his entire face was splotchy and red.

"There's nothing to listen to Edward. Just go. I really can't do this anymore. I need a break," I mumbled quietly.

"FUCKING GOD DAMN IT ISABELLA! You are _going_ to listen to me! FUCK! You can't just fucking… end it with me! I fucking love you and you know you love me! Nothing even happened with that chick! I swear to fucking god I didn't do anything. God Bella, please," Edward stood up when he started his rant and he was pacing across my room and pulling on his hair. I almost broke in my resolve but I knew this had to happen. What if the next time someone didn't interrupt, accident or not? I couldn't risk that blow to my heart and ego.

"I do love you, you're right. That's why I'm doing this. You may not understand but I can't risk you hurting me like this again. I just… this isn't good for us okay? I'm going to ask you again to please leave Edward. Give me time… and space. I'll get a hold of you when I'm ready," my voice sounded so empty as I stood there feeling the tearing through my chest. When he walked out of that door, he would be taking my heart with him.

"Bella… please," he whimpered as he stood directly in front of me. I still couldn't look into his face because I knew how much it would hurt me to see his pain. I had to be objective and save myself before it was too late to do so. I shook my head and he gently grabbed my chin and pulled my face up to look at him. I pulled my chin from his hand and stepped to the side away from the door as a hint for him to leave but he stepped with me and grabbed my chin a little more firmly.

I felt yet another wave of tears as I watched his eyes move over my face as though he was memorizing it. I felt my chest tight and there was a burn all the way to my toes. I was dizzy and light headed due to my previous tears so I didn't catch the signs that he was going to kiss me.

When Edward's lips met mine I froze. I couldn't even consider pushing him away because his lips felt so right against mine. I forced myself not to kiss him back as he held my chin tenderly. I felt the hot wetness of his tears on my cheek as he tried to coax me into reciprocating the kiss.

"Kiss me back Bella," he whispered against my lips. I gasped out a sob and pressed my hands to his chest about to push him back but his hands enclosed mine and held me closer to him as his lips descended on mine again. I again forced myself to stay frozen and Edward jerked back away from me. He stared over me one more time before flinging my door open and storming out of the room.

I took some deep breaths and calmed my racing heart. My fingers unconsciously found my lips and I wanted to cry again but there wasn't enough energy in my body. I slide down the wall to the floor and stared at my packed bag on the floor by my bed. I felt so empty and alone. I missed him even more than when I was at home and he was so far away.

"What the fuck did I just do?" I questioned the room around me before laying my head on my knees and staring aimlessly at the charm bracelet on my night stand.

**EPOV**

I sucked up my tears and held my head high as I left Bella's house and entered my car. I hadn't left the first time. I made it to the bottom of the stairs just as Charlie was walking out the door and listened to her scream and cry, the sounds tearing at my heart. I needed to fix this. I couldn't let her go through so much unnecessary pain. I climbed back up the stairs after she had entered the bathroom. Through the paper-thin walls I could hear her getting sick and then start the shower. I felt like the biggest piece of shit to walk the earth for hurting her.

She still didn't listen to me when she came back in the room. I tried not to get mad but I let the anger at myself come out as I yelled at her. I even tried desperation and she still ignored me. My last ditch effort was the kiss but Bella stood there like a dead fish. I felt myself crying again as I begged her to just kiss me. If she would return my affections then everything could be great but Bella didn't even attempt to return my affection.

I didn't remember driving home from her father's house and I didn't remember walking up to my room or getting in the shower. All I knew was that an hour had past and my hair was wet as I lie on my bed wrapped only in a towel. I was shivering from the cold air coming from my fan but I didn't care. I just stared at the ceiling feeling sorry for myself.

My stupidity lost her and I couldn't deny that. I wasn't good enough for her either way and I had known that from the moment I laid eyes on her. I remembered my mother coming in momentarily to ask me about eating but the thought made my stomach turn. She asked me what was wrong but I only rolled away from her and ignored the comment.

"Edward, sweetie, you need to get dressed. You slept in that towel last night with your hair wet… I don't know what happened but everything will work out the way it's meant to," Esme spoke as she sank down onto my bed next to me running her fingers through my hair. I cringed away from the touch, it reminded me of how Bella loved running her fingers through my hair.

"It's not going to work out this time Mom. Bella hates me. I'm such an idiot. God… I miss her already. I haven't heard her voice in almost twenty-four hours and it's driving me insane. I know you think it's unhealthy but… I'm _addicted_ to that girl," I moaned the words and closed my eyes as my mother shook her head in disapproval.

"You're right, it's not healthy at your age but I understand completely. I feel the same way about your father. I'm completely addicted to him and I was from the moment I laid eyes on him. I'm sure whatever happened between the two of you will blow over and you'll be just fine," she smiled and patted my back before leaving my room.

"God… I hope you're right. I can't survive without her," I mumbled out to the empty room. It had been less than twenty-four hours and I was already losing my shit.

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**Love to hear your thoughts!**


	14. Painful Connections

**Playlist:**  
_Some Nights_ - Fun_  
Use Me Up_ - Hanson_  
Jar of Hearts_ – Christina Perri_  
I Won't Give Up_ – Jason Mraz_  
Don't Wanna Lose You Now_ – Backstreet Boys

* * *

**EPOV**

The first few weeks after Bella told me to fuck off were hard. I felt like shit and I couldn't sleep for fear of the nightmares that plagued me of that night. I lived off of coffee and 5-hour energy drinks. It was definitely not healthy considering I wasn't eating and I practically looked like a corpse with all the weight I had lost because I couldn't stomach food.

Despite Bella's request for time and space, I e-mailed her and left voicemails on her phone at least once a day. I text messaged her and even stooped low enough to call her mother after Alice told me to go fuck myself and that she was going to cut off my balls and shove them down my throat the next time she laid eyes on me. I was kind of scared of that little pixie.

Nobody would tell me what was going on with Bella and every message I sent her was deleted without her even reading it; I was sure of that even though I had no proof.

Jasper had taken to ignoring me as of late because he complained about my being a 'pussy whipped pansy assed motherfucker who wouldn't just stop with the bitching' and he said I made him feel like someone had died. He just didn't understand what it did to my heart to loss Bella like that.

Somewhere during the sixth week after that fateful night, I stopped being depressed and I got pissed. I woke up and checked my phone and e-mail, as was my routine, and again there was nothing from Bella. It was like an explosion went off in my head. What more could I have done? It was an accident, it's not like I meant to do anything stupid. If she had just told me she was coming to visit then it never would have happened. I had turned this all into Bella's fault and Jasper was going to be the first one to hear about my discovery.

"This is all her fucking fault! I didn't do anything! It was a fucking drunken accident!" I yelled out into the room as I paced while Jasper threw a baseball up in the air and caught it from his lying position on his bed.

"So explain how this is her fault again? Oh and _please_ tell me this is the last of these conversations," I could just hear the eye-roll in Jasper's voice.

"It's her fault because she didn't tell me she was coming! She cancelled our webcam date and didn't give me any kind of reason! I was fucking depressed and took to drowning my misery and loneliness in alcohol while she got to be all excited and happy because she was coming to see me! Ever heard of sharing the fucking wealth?" I growled at the thought of Bella singing and dancing happily as she packed her bags and hopped on a plane while I was close to tears and drinking entire bottles of liquor to soothe my broken heart.

"But she was trying to surprise you," Jasper argued for Bella's sake but I could see the look in his eyes that said he thought I was partially right.

"Doesn't matter Jasper, I never would have been drinking that night if I had known. If I hadn't been drinking then I never would have ended up in a compromising position with that chick," my logic was making more and more sense as I continued to explain it.

"But the fault doesn't matter. Dude, you're young. Stop trying to tie yourself down so quickly. Just live," Jasper shrugged and stared at me for a moment. I took in his words and felt my brows wrinkle as the thoughts filtered through my brain.

He was right. I shouldn't dwell on what I couldn't change. I did love Bella but that wasn't going to bring her back to me. I needed to suck it up, shake it off and get on with my life regardless of how much it hurt. I would just shove the pain back and it would fade eventually… right?

**BPOV**

"Bella, he's calling you again," Alice sneered at me as she pointed to my phone. I shrugged my shoulders and turned back to the laptop in front of me. I was going through the 157 e-mails Edward had sent me in the past 6 weeks. The more he tried, the worse I felt about him. I had asked him for time and he was smothering me with his presence.

"Don't care. You can answer it if you'd like. I told him I'd contact him when I was ready to talk again but he just won't leave me alone," I sighed and picked up my phone as it chimed to tell me there was a new message.

"You're actually going to listen to the message? Bella, he's a complete ass for what he did to you and you should just delete it," Alice reached for my phone and I ripped it away from her reach and gave her a glare.

"Alice, I love you but don't fuck with me. I listen to every message and I read every e-mail because regardless of what happened I'm hurting and it makes me feel better to know he cares still. I only listen because I'm hoping somewhere in one of these I'll find the reason behind why things had to happen the way they did," I let myself admit how I really felt as my head hung down to avoid her gaze.

"Oh Bella… I really thought you were getting over this but you're not even close to that are you?" she questioned me with a half smile as she ran her fingers through my hair. I shook my head and pressed my forehead to my desk to hide the few tears I had let escape.

"I'm fine Alice. I just want to listen to this, okay?" I whispered before clearing my throat and sitting back up. I wiped my face quickly and pressed send on my voicemail to hear the voice I craved more than anything.

"_Bella, I've decided to stop this. I need to leave you alone and give you space. I'm just calling to tell you that… well I guess to say I won't be calling anymore. Um… so… yeah… bye,_" Edward's voice filtered over the line and my heart dropped to my stomach. He didn't say he loved me once. He didn't say he missed me at all. That was a thirty second message and they were usually a few minutes in length.

"Oh fuck… Bella?" Alice's voice was faint as I felt my chest tightening. My breathing was coming out ragged and my head was spinning. I felt like I couldn't catch my breath and my chest was on fire. I felt the wetness on my checks but my focus was on the short gasping breaths I was trying to take in.

"BELLA! You're hyperventilating! What the fuck? Breathe into the bag," her voice was panicked and I felt like I was going to pass out. All I could think about was whether this was what it felt like to have a panic attack and why did Edward suddenly not want me anymore.

"Can't… breathe… need… help," I managed to gasp as Alice thrust the bag over my mouth violently. I took in a few short breaths before I started coughing violently. Alice patted my back and I waved her away.

"Shit Bella, take slow, deep breaths!" Alice shouted in my ear. I tried to focus on taking the slow deep breaths but all I could think about was the defeat in Edward's words. He had given up on me. He didn't want me anymore and that was more painful than walking in on him with that girl.

"I'm… okay," I gasped out as the dizziness began to lift away from me and I could finally focus again. I could feel the tears streaming down my cheeks and my chest was aching.

"Bella, what the hell did he say?" the anger in Alice's voice was shocking and only made my eyes tear up even more than before. I didn't want her anger with him in that moment. I wanted my friend to hold me and comfort me while I cried for the complete loss of my first love.

"He… he gave up. He doesn't want me anymore…" I whispered as my grip tightened on my phone.

"Oh god… I'm so sorry Bella. He's a damn fool," her arms came around me and I buried my head in her chest as painful sobs began to wrack my body. My body shook with the force of my cries as I finally let all the pain fully flood my system.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*4 MONTHS LATER*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

**EPOV**

"Jessica! Come on… quit being a bitch! I mean seriously! I was just fucking with you," I called out after the frizzy haired brunette that was stomping away from our table in the Port Angeles Mall food court.

"You're an insensitive prick Edward. It's taken her years to be okay with her natural curly hair and then you tell her she has hair like a brillo-pad so what do you expect?" Lauren sneered at me before she got up to follow Jessica away from the table.

"You cock-blocking son of a bitch! I was so going to get a blow job from Lauren tonight and now you totally ruined it!" Jasper groaned as he gave me a glare.

"Eh… she's not that good anyway," I rolled my eyes and smirked at him knowing that my comment would piss him off.

"God damn it Edward! Have you done something sexual with _every_ girl in our school?" he cried out in disgust but I just allowed a laugh to escape my lips.

"Not all of them. Hey just think of it this way, I'm taking your advice," I smirked at him with a raised eyebrow and he just shook his head at me.

"I think you took that advice way beyond my context. I never told you to sleep with anything that walks," he groaned and stood from his chair. I followed suit and we headed out of the mall and to my Volvo in the parking lot.

"Whatever Jazz, what are we doing tonight?" I questioned him as I slide behind the wheel. I figured we'd hit up some party or get drunk at my place.

"I don't know. I was planning on the blow job but… I don't really feel like doing anything tonight," Jasper tapped his fingers on the dash as he stared out his passenger side window.

"Seriously dude? You're really that pissed at me for scaring Lauren off?" I questioned him incredulously, she really wasn't that good.

"Well… I'm… uh… sorta… meetingupwithAliceandBella," Jasper mumbled and his entire speech was one long word instead of a sentence.

"You're what?" I asked in disbelief. Neither of us had spoken of Bella since he had convinced me to try and let her go.

"Bella and Alice are in Forks. They're visiting Chief Swan for Christmas break," Jasper sighed and looked down. I stopped for a second and stared at him in shock.

"If Alice is in town, why the fuck were you going to get a blow job from Lauren?" I wondered mainly to avoid thinking of Bella. The thought of her being so close made my heart pound in my chest.

"I wasn't. I just didn't want to let you on to that fact because Alice made me swear to keep you away from Bella. Apparently Bella has… umm… she's seeing someone back in Phoenix," Jasper looked out the window again and my foot slammed on the break in a knee-jerk reaction.

"What? Are you fucking kidding me?" I cried out as the suppressed pain of four months ago flared up in my chest and my eyes watered.

"I thought you were over her," Jasper gave me a pointed look as he spoke.

"You dumb fucker! How could you think I was ever truly over her?!" I growled at him and felt my hands tightening painfully on the steering wheel.

"You're not going near her. I fucking promised Alice. God, I never should have said anything to you," Jasper groaned letting his head fall back against the seat.

"Of course I'm going over there and you're coming with me. If she has Alice, I'm having you there with me. Who is this fucker she's seeing anyway? I don't give a damn about her being with someone and you know it Jazz," I pushed the gas pedal down and turned toward Chief Swan's house.

"Edward, you know you're my best friend but this is a really dumb idea. Just… let it go, please?" Jasper begged me and I turned to look at him trying to read his face. Jasper never begged.

"What is this? You're hiding something from me. Spill it you fucking traitor," I spat at him as I took the next turn.

"Bella specifically asked me to keep you away from her while she was here. She said… well that doesn't matter really but… I don't want you to get hurt bro," his voice had softened and I knew there was more to what he was trying to say.

"The guy is with her, isn't he?" I asked in desperation. Jasper shook his head and swallowed hard.

"No, he's not with her but… well Chief Swan kind of knows that you two ahh… yeah," Jasper admitted sheepishly and I froze.

"She fucking told him?! I'm surprised I'm not dead yet!" I whined before making the last turn that would take me past Bella's house. I could see that the cruiser wasn't in the driveway so I relaxed some.

"Edward! You fucking idiot! Keep going past that house!" Jasper yelled at me as I slowed down intent on turning into her driveway. Just as I started to turn my wheel the front door opened and a grinning Bella walked out followed by Alice. They were talking and laughing as they locked up the door but once they turned around and saw my car I could see Bella deflate.

The color in her face drained as she stared directly at me through the windshield. I felt my breathing increase and my heart was pounding. I put the car in park and began to open my door when Bella fell to her knees on the porch gripping her chest. I could see the tears rolling down her cheeks before I could hear the sob that left her mouth.

**BPOV**

I didn't know it would tear this hole in my chest so violently when I saw him again. I thought I was over him. The green of his eyes pierced straight through the glass as he stared at me with wide eyes. It was like watching a train wreck… I just couldn't look away from him. His hair was the same bronze mess but just a little longer and shaggier than I remembered. His jaw held the day's stubble in a sexy, strong five o-clock shadow that made him appear so much older. My entire body shook as the sobs ripped through me and brought me to my knees.

I watched as he began to open his door only to have Jasper grab his arm from the passenger seat. I could tell Jasper was pissed off at Edward and I could feel the anger at him ebbing in the back of my mind for telling Edward I was visiting but it wasn't my biggest concern in that moment.

"Get up Bella. Let's go back inside. Shopping can wait," Alice grabbed my arm and tried to tug me forward but I wouldn't move. It was like a piece of my heart was dying and I couldn't breathe.

"Alice… it… hurts… God! I thought… I was…. over this!" I whimpered as I continued to stare at Edward. His eyes never left mine even as Jasper tugged at his arm.

"Bella, you can't do this. You're only here a week and then you'll be going back home to Demetri. Come on, get inside before he comes over here," Alice begged me but I shook my head.

"I'm not dating Demetri! Jesus Alice, we're only friends. I still love Edward… I know I said I didn't want to see him but… fuck… I need to see him. It fucking hurts," I lost my connection with Edward's eyes and looked toward Alice who shook her head at me.

"I'll be the one left to pick up the pieces. I told you what Jazz said has been going on with him," Alice sighed and sank down to her knees next to me.

"I know… I'm not going to sleep with him or get together with him or anything. I just… need some closure," I stared at the porch under me as I spoke and it made me jump when I heard the car door slam.

"BELLA!" Edward called out to me and I looked up to see him running toward me. I hiccupped once and wiped my face as he got closer.

"Go away," Alice growled as she put her arm around my shoulder.

"None of your business troll," Edward growled back and I flinched away from him. He looked at me in shock and I shook my head.

"What… what are you doing here?" I asked in a cracked and broken voice.

"Jazz let it slip you were here for winter break. I miss you Bella," Edward moved a little closer to me and I moved back into Alice. If he touched me I'd be screwed.

"I… can't do this. This needs to be… closure," the last word came out more as a whisper instead of the strength I had intended to put into my statement.

"You don't mean that. You're hurting as much as I am baby. I can see it in your eyes. Please Bella," Edward coaxed as he reached out toward me but I jerked out of his reach and sighed at the hurt look in his eyes that my actions caused.

"Don't touch her," Alice's voice was menacing and I wanted to smack her.

"Go away Alice, I need to talk to Edward alone please," I looked at her and she glared at Edward. I knew she didn't trust him or me for that matter but I just needed this closure with him.

"Fine but I'll be over there with Jasper," Alice pointed to Edward's car and I nodded before allowing myself to sit fully on the porch. Edward moved to sit next to me but I held up my hand to stop him.

"Please, keep your distance. I can't have you touching me," I whimpered and felt weak as another few tears fell from my eyes.

"Come on Bella, don't be like that. I fucking lo..." I slapped my hand over his mouth hard and watched as his eyes widened under the contact. The buzz of warmth that I always felt when we touched shot through my arm. I wanted to melt into it and let him hold me but instead I yanked my hand away from him.

"Please don't say that to me," I begged him as I looked into his eyes. I could see the red mark from my hand forming around his mouth and I felt intensely guilty.

"You know what? I'm not going to walk on eggshells with you! I love you Bella! I miss you and this shit is fucking wrong! I never slept with that bitch okay? You KNOW I was drunk and I thought she was you! I was so mad that you had canceled our webcam date and I was drowning in the pain I felt so I thought alcohol was a good idea! Fuck, you KNOW I would never have intentionally hurt you," Edward was panting by the time he finished his rant.

"I know that Edward," I simply said to him as I traced a wood pattern on the porch with my finger.

"Then what the fuck? You know how much this hurts. I feel like a piece of me has been ripped out of my chest Bella. Please…" Edward moved closer and sat down ignoring my protests. He grabbed my face in his hands and gently pulled me up to look at him. I could see the red rimming his watery eyes and the tear stains on his cheeks. I knew he could see the same thing on my face.

"I can't… it hurts too damn much when we're apart. It's just better this way," I begged him to understand that he couldn't kiss me like I knew he was planning to.

"I love you. We'll make it work this time," his voice was soft and rough as he pulled me closer to him. I could feel this warm, minty breath on my face.

"Please…" I begged and I wasn't sure anymore if I was begging him to stop or keep going. Edward took it as a keep going and his lips brushed against mine softly before he pulled back enough to look in my eyes. Whatever he saw encouraged him because he pushed himself forward and his lips met mine roughly. His hands slid back into my hair and he tightened his hold on me in desperation as our lips pulled and teased each other before his tongue drug along my lips causing me to gasp into the kiss.

"Bella, NO! Don't let him do this to you! You know it's only going to hurt more if you do this!" Alice cried out from somewhere but I couldn't find it in me to care that what she was saying was right.

"This isn't our business Alice," I could hear Jasper talking as Alice huffed. My lips were still connected to Edward and my hands were pulling at his hair. I was so confused and I didn't know if I was trying to pull him away or make him stay but as my head started to feel fuzzy and I became dizzy I finally removed my hands from his hair to shove at his chest until our connection was broken.

"No Edward, I can't do this. I'm sorry," I whispered as our foreheads came together and we were both gasping for air.

"FUCK YOU JASPER! You didn't hold her when she cried her heart out every night or force her to eat because she was losing so much weight you could see her fucking ribs! You didn't have to comfort her as she screamed out his name at night through her nightmares! This _is_ my business!" Alice screamed and I felt a hand on my arm yanking me to my feet.

"Bella, please… we can talk about this. At least say we can be friends and talk… please," Edward begged as Alice tugged me to my door.

"E-mail me… we'll discuss it later," I gave him a half-smile and Alice spun on her heels and gave Edward the meanest look she could manage.

"You, stay away. I told you what I would do to you if I ever saw you again and I wasn't joking. You better just leave her alone and move on. I will not let you destroy her like that again," Alice growled and spit at Edward. I stared at her in shock and fear. That was a side of my best friend I had never seen, she didn't spit.

"Edward, we really should go," Jasper called and I turned away. I couldn't watch Edward walk out of my life again.

**EPOV**

I stared at the door after Alice slammed it in my face. I was in shock at the way she had behaved. This was between Bella and me. I understood that I had hurt Bella and I wanted to make that fact right. Why was Alice screaming at me and spitting at me?

"Dude, what the hell is wrong with Alice?" I questioned Jasper as he helped me up and back to the car where he took the liberty to drive us back to my house.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you what's been going on. I've kept in touch with Alice… we're like pen-pals I guess in a way. We e-mail and talk on the phone occasionally. She told me what it's been like for Bella and dude… it's not pretty. When she dropped 30 pounds her mom threatened to send her to a hospital," Jasper admitted and I stared at him.

"30 pounds?! She'd look like a skeleton with skin draped over her!" I cried out in disgust.

"Well, we all deal in our own ways. Apparently she's made friends with this Demetri guy and he's good for her. He really likes her and Alice said that she's pretty sure Bella likes him too. This is the reason she wanted you to stay away," Jasper kept talking but I stopped listening.

I had caused her more pain than I had imagined. While I was running around and trying to fuck her out of my system she was almost killing herself because of me. I felt sick to my stomach and my head was spinning.

"I am such an insensitive prick. No wonder Alice hates me," I sighed and laid my head against the window.

"Listen, if it helps you feel any better Bella still loves you and she only started getting really bad when you decided to stop contacting her. Alice said it was the last straw and that Bella felt like you had given up on her," Jasper flinched away when he saw the look on my face. I remember that conversation with perfect clarity because Jasper was the one who suggested it.

"Sometimes I really fucking hate you," I growled and looked away. Twice he had convinced me to make stupid mistakes that led to me hurting Bella. I decided right in that moment that I wouldn't be taking any more of his advice.

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**Love to hear thoughts!**


	15. Imperfectly Perfect

**Many of you probably aren't reading this anymore. I know its been a long while but I can't control life. Life just happens. I've dealt with a new career, death, illness and new life in the past year. These are things that have kept me from writing. I can't promise the updates will happen often as I work nights but I will continue to try my best to keep them coming, even if I'm only writing for me!**

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_Dairy of Jane_ – Breaking Benjamin_  
Bring Me to Life_ - Evanescence_  
Second Chance_ – Secondhand Serenade_  
Are You Gonna Kiss Me or Not_ – Thompson Square**  
**_One Thing_ – One Direction  
_Whistle_ – Flo Rida

**BPOV**

"Bella, I swear this has to be the stupidest thing you have ever decided to do!" Alice cried out as I finished running the flat iron through my hair. I rolled my eyes and started to apply a light coat of make up to enhance my features.

"Listen, I appreciate your concern, I really do but it's not your decision. I love you but Alice… this means something to me. Tonight could be nothing more than closure but I might have the opportunity to be happy again. Please let me have that," I looked up at her earnestly begging her to give in to me this one time.

"Think about what you're doing here! What about Demetri? He loves you!" Alice tried again and I shook my head at her. I didn't want to get pissed off at her but she was really pushing it.

"I'm not dating Demetri and I never will. I don't feel that way about him. I realize that he may have feelings for me but I don't have any for him. Now I'm done with this conversation. I want to go out with Edward tonight and let whatever happens, happen," my voice was harsher than I had meant for it to be but Alice needed to leave the Demetri thing alone already.

"Fine, but when you're heart gets broken again don't expect me to help you pick up the pieces. Fool me once, shame on you but fool me twice, shame on me. You need to learn from your mistakes and move on!" she stomped her way out of my room and down the stairs. I finished applying my light coat of make-up and walked toward the stairs just in time to hear Charlie call up the stairs for me.

"Isabella! Get down here!" he called up and I could hear the hint of irritation in his voice. I stood up straighter and pulled my shoulders back ready to face his fury. I knew Alice had tattled on me.

"What's up Dad?" I called into the kitchen from the bottom of the stairs. Charlie stormed out with his face red and Alice was standing behind him with a smug look covering her face.

"Alice says you're going out with that Cullen kid tonight?" he demanded as his fists clenched and his eye twitched.

"I am. Is this going to be a problem?" I questioned innocently. Charlie's face went from red to purple and I had to force myself not to flinch.

"That… that … _boy_ is NOT going to touch my baby again. I won't allow this Bella. You're not going anywhere with him!" he growled angrily. I sighed and took a seat on the couch.

"Dad, this is my choice. I know you love me and you care but I need this, if only for closure," I give him the puppy dog eyes that always made him melt when I was little. I saw the first piece of armor fall rather quickly.

"I don't know about this, Bells. The boy practically stomped on your heart the last time and from what your mother says it tore you up pretty badly," he sighed with a skeptical look on his face and I swooped in for the kill in that moment of vulnerability.

"Daddy, don't you want me to be happy?" I questioned as I looked up at him and saw the shield of anger fall and his shoulders sag. Alice saw the same thing and I could see the fury in her eyes at my disruption of what she thought to be the perfect plan.

"Of course I do, Bells. If you think he will make you happy, go but please for all that is holy don't let yourself get so attached! You're mother was terrified after I sent you home. Don't let him destroy you like that again or I won't be so nice to him this time around," Charlie glared at the front door as if Edward was standing there waiting for me.

"Thank you so much Daddy!" I jumped to my feet and hugged him enthusiastically and sent a victorious smirk over his shoulder to Alice.

"Charlie I don't trust Edward. I don't think this is a good idea!" Alice pouted and even stomped her foot petulantly. I rolled my eyes at her when Charlie turned to face her.

"Alice, honey, I know you love Bella and you're worried but we have to let Bella make her own choices. We can't force our wishes on her regardless of how right we might be about things. Aren't you going to hang out with the Hale boy tonight? He seems like a good kid," Charlie put his arm over Alice's shoulder and I felt my jaw drop open at his comment regarding Jasper because he was just as bad as Edward.

**EPOV**

"Holy shit… fuck… shit…" I grumbled out as I ripped shirts from their hangers trying to find the perfect look. I felt like such a chick but I couldn't help it. I was nervous as hell and still shocked that Bella had agreed to going out with me.

"I don't know what your clothes ever did to you but I would imagine that it can't be horrible enough to require your current abuse," I heard my mother's amused voice from the door of my bedroom. I turned to glare at her.

"I'm going to be late. I'm picking Bella up in half hour and I can't find my dark green shirt," I ground out as I swore under my breath again.

"Language, please! I swear you would lose your head if it wasn't attached. You're dark green shirt is in the laundry room but I haven't ironed it yet," Esme gave me a half smirk and I growled at the ceiling.

"Just fu… freaking perfect!" I caught my almost slip and smiled sheepishly at my mother who shook her head and turned to leave.

"I'll have it ready in about ten minutes. That will give you plenty of time to get to Bella and reacquaint yourself with Chief Swan," she called back to me and the smile slipped from my face. I felt sick at the thought of facing Chief Swan when I picked up Bella.

The man had guns and I got the awful feeling that he may very well want to aim one or more at me considering he knew that my intentions toward his daughter were not entirely honorable.

"Thanks for the reminder Mom," I muttered knowing that she couldn't hear me. My heart was pounding out a crazy staccato rhythm that the butterflies fluttering in my stomach were accompanying in an eerily perfect way.

I paced the room and felt my stomach churning in anticipation. I was starting to feel sick when my mother poked her head back through the door holding my shirt. I let out a huge sigh of relief and she laughed heartily.

"Edward, you're white as a sheet! Relax or you're going to give yourself an anxiety attack," Esme continued to giggle at me as she hung my shirt on the door handle.

"What if she won't forgive me? What if she's only going with me to tell me she doesn't want me? What if her dad pulls a gun on me? Oh, hell!" I whimpered as my hands flew up to tug on my hair.

"Language! Chief Swan would never pull his gun on you Edward. Stop panicking and get dressed. She's waiting for you because she wants to see you," my mother was a wise woman.

**BPOV**

I was staring out the front window pacing as I waited for Edward's car to pull in. My stomach churned dangerously. Alice tapped out an angry rhythm with her heels as we avoided looking at one another. My soul focus was on seeing that copper hair and those piercing green eyes. I knew that just a glimpse would do a world of good to calm my nerves.

"Just sit down! You're making _me_ nervous!" Alice cried out as she threw her hands up in the air. I stifled a giggle and sat down in the chair across from her.

"Stop tapping your heels. It's like nails on a chalkboard," I mustered up the best glare I could through my humor but Alice wasn't fooled.

"Whatever Bella, don't come crying to me when tonight doesn't go as you planned," she rolled her eyes and turned her head away from me.

"How can I explain this so you get it? Just hearing his voice brings a painfully large smile to my face. A glimpse of him is enough to send my heart racing and his touch… I'm surprised I haven't had a heart attack. It's like a fire burns wherever he touches but it's a fire that burns so good. I don't know Ali, but that's the best way I can explain it. He consumes me. I love him and it doesn't matter what happens I believe I'll always love him. I'll compare everyone to him but they'll never match up and I'll always wonder what could have been. You've got to let me work this out. You're my friend and your purpose is to be there for me when I make stupid choices that end in heartbreak," I sighed. I felt the urge to cry but stifled it quickly.

"Bella, I'm just worried about you," Alice whispered. I could see the moisture in her eyes.

"I've heard your argument. I know you're worried but you can't stand between this. I have to do this regardless of what you think. Just be my friend, okay?" I begged her.

We stared at each other for what seemed like hours but had to have only been moments before a knock came at the door. I stood to answer it and gave Alice one last look before she gave me a slight nod. I couldn't stop myself from squealing and hugging her tightly to me.

"Just be careful and protect yourself," Alice whispered into my ear. I nodded and took off to answer the door.

"Edward…" I sighed as I swung the door open and saw his crooked smile. My heart pounded in my chest and I fought the urge to jump into his arm. I had truly missed him more than I realized.

"Hi Bella… I've really missed you," his green eyes traced my body and I felt myself blush under his gaze. I could feel the tingling over my skin that I welcomed like a breath of fresh air.

**EPOV**

I wanted her. My hands itched to caress her check and my arms ached to pull her into my chest. My lips burned with a painful need to feel hers against them. I stared at her shamelessly and watched the sexy red flush bloom over her cheeks making my knees weak with my desperation to hold her. I didn't want to presume she would want my touch so I forced myself to hold back.

"Ah… Edward. Come in," Chief Swan called out as he entered the living room. I could feel my eyes widen in panic but Bella gave me a gentle smile that relaxed it all away. I would do anything for her.

"Good evening Chief Swan," I could hear the squeak of nervousness in my voice and I cursed myself internally for appearing so weak in front of the Chief.

"Dad… you promised," Bella glared at him and Chief Swan ignored her.

"What do you have planned for tonight Edward?" he questioned me with his cop voice. I could see how criminal cracked under interrogation, that voice was intimidating.

"Um… Port Angeles… I mean…. Sorry. I'm taking Bella to dinner in Port Angeles," I cursed myself again for the stuttering under his heavy gaze.

"Well, have fun and Bella, you have a curfew," Chief Swan grinned and Bella's jaw clenched. She was pissed.

"With all due respect _Dad_, I'm eighteen. I don't think a curfew is necessary," Bella ground out. Chief Swan cocked an eyebrow at her in amusement.

"Be back by eleven or I'm sending you home tomorrow morning," he grinned as Bella's mouth fell up. I held back my sigh of irritation. I had been hoping it would be a very long night.

"Yes, of course sir. I will have her back by eleven," I stated with more confidence than I had since entering Chief Swan's house. He nodded at us and I nudged Bella to get her to follow me. I wanted to reach for her hand but I was afraid of the rejection.

Once we were outside, I opened to car door for Bella and walked around to climb in my side. She sat with her arms crossed looking out of her window with a scowl on her face. I swallowed hard and started the car.

"Is everything okay?" I questioned. I didn't want our night to begin with Bella being pissed off at me.

"No, it's not alright! I'm pissed off. How could you agree to a damn curfew for me? I am an adult and I can make my own decisions. Charlie doesn't get to tell me what to do anymore. And you! Do I smell bad or something? I mean come on Edward; you can't even hold a girl's hand? Is this a closure date for you? Are you trying to tell me you're done? If it is then we can just do that right here and now!" Bella cried out as she spun to glare at me. I shrank back in my seat and took a deep breath.

"I didn't want to presume… I've got a lot of making up to do. I know that I fucked up with you and I'm sorry for that. I want you to forgive me Bella. I don't want to push you and believe me when I say all I've wanted to do since I laid eyes on you was pull you into my arms and kiss you," I gave her my signature smile but her glare didn't fade like I thought it would. She reached over and slapped me in the face.

"You're an asshole!" Bella growled. I stared at her in shock as I held my face.

"What the fuck was that for?!" I cried out, my anger boiling over.

"That was for not giving me my space when I asked for it and it's also for giving up when you had _no_ right to make that decision! I should have had the final say after what you did, Edward! That was the lowest and most cowardly thing you could have ever done telling me that you were giving up!" Bella was panting now and I could see the sheen of tears in her eyes. I needed to fix this. We hadn't even left her drive way.

"I know that. I'm so sorry. I'm such an idiot. I love you. I know that you don't care to hear that from me but it's the truth. I think about you all the time and I compare every girl to you. I've tried fucking you out of my head but it's not helping in the least bit because nothing feels like it did with you. I'm eighteen years old Bella, we're not supposed to feel this all-consuming, painful type of love. I don't know what to do with this. How can I love you this much?" my hands shook as I spoke. I wanted her forgiveness more than I had ever wanted anything.

"Why did you do it Edward?" she whispered as the tears crested and rolled down her cheeks. I felt my heart break at the sight of her pain.

"I was upset that you had cancelled our date over the webcam. I missed you like crazy and I had been looking forward to that night for so long. It was bad enough I couldn't come for your birthday but not seeing you at all… that hurt me. I felt like a fucking horrible boyfriend. You deserved to be held and taken out for your birthday but I couldn't do that for you. When Jasper asked me to go to that party I just needed to get out and I wanted the pain to go away. I drank… a lot. I don't remember exactly what happened but I was in the bathroom and all of the sudden you walked in the room and the pain was gone. I could breathe again except… it wasn't you. When you came in I realized she didn't feel right and she didn't smell right. I wanted to throw up…well you know I _did_ throw up. I had a lot to drink and I know that isn't an excuse but it's the truth. I would have _never_ done that sober. I love you too much to hurt you intentionally," I released a heavy breath and closed my eyes. I didn't want to watch her walk away from me again.

"Are you still drinking?" she asked quietly. I shook my head without opening my eyes.

"I haven't touched the shit since that night. It wasn't worth it," I mumbled and took in a deep breath.

"And you're sorry? You'll never do that to me again?" her voice was so soft when she asked. I opened my eyes and looked at her. I could see the hope in her eyes and my heart pounded in my chest as I sat up and stared into her eyes.

"I'm more than sorry but they haven't created a word to describe the way I feel yet. I will never, ever do that to you again. If you forgive me Bella I will stay away from all females except my mom. I swear it to you. I will make this work if you take me back," I felt like I couldn't breathe waiting for her answer.

"So no more fucking me out of your head?" she leaned forward and I sucked in a painful breath of air in anticipation.

"More like fucking you… Please Bella," I whimpered pathetically. She tilted her head and stared at me for a minute before her mouth crashed against mine and her hands knotted in my hair. I didn't hesitate to pull her by her hips over the console to feel her body pressed against me.

A fire burned through me at her touch and I couldn't control the way I gripped her hips and shoved my tongue into her mouth. I felt her moan into my mouth and I was lost. My hands had a mind of their own as they slid over her hips and up her sides to cup her breasts. I could feel her chest heaving and my dick strained against my pants.

"Fuck… we need to go somewhere… now," Bella groaned out desperately between the meetings of our lips. I nodded but didn't let her pull away when she tried. I couldn't let her go again it would physically kill me.

"No… here is good," I mumbled and pressed my body into hers. Bella's hands gripped my shirt at my chest and gently pushed me away. She giggled as I pouted. God I had missed that giggle.

"My Dad is right inside that house… with his guns. Would you like to be caught molesting his daughter in the drive way of his home?" Bella laughed and I straightened up and moved back to my seat.

"Right… finding a new place to go…" I shifted the car into reverse and took off from the Chief's house.

**BPOV**

"Are you hungry?" Edward asked me as he squeezed my hand in his. I smiled at him and nodded.

"Yeah I kind of am but I don't want to go anywhere that's going to take too much time. I'd much rather finish what we started in my Dad's drive way," I rubbed my legs together to try and relieve the need for friction. Edward's eyes had caught the motion and he licked his lips only making it harder not to jump him.

"Fuck… I know what I'd like to eat," he groaned and pulled his hand from mine to adjust himself in his pants. I was seriously close to causing a horrific traffic accident.

"Just find us a place to park… like now. Food can wait," I moaned as I thought of the way he would feel against me.

"Parking," he gasped out as I reached over to grip him through his jeans. "Ohhh fuuuuuck!"

I smirked at him as he groaned and his head turned frantically looking for a safe spot to park. I didn't care if we got caught; I was desperate to feel him again.

"You have to stop that Bella! I'm going to wreck. I can't concentrate," Edward growled as I pulled at the buttons to his jeans.

"Then I suggest you find a place to park quicker…" I leaned over the console and whispered before running my tongue along the shell of his ear. I felt him shiver and whimper before the car jerked to the right.

"This will work, off the beaten path. Ohh shit… I… fuck Bella!" he cried out as I kissed down his neck only to gently bite down on his neck. The car jerked forward suddenly and I felt Edward slam the shifter into park.

I tried to continue my path back up to his lips but Edward had other plans. He flung open his car door ran to my side flinging open my door as well. He quickly opened the back door and climbed in before pulling me into the car as well.

"I want you so much right now Edward… please…" I begged as he began kneading my breast roughly before pulling at my clothes.

"Shit, please fucking help me with these!" he whined before letting his hands fly from my chest into his hair to tug at the mess there. I grinned at him before opening my shirt and bra to allow him access as I wriggled out of my panties.

I quickly removed his shirt and unbuttoned his pants but before I could move his pants at all his hands found my bare sex. The sexiest groan left his lips as I felt him circle my clit causing my body to arch up to meet him.

"God, don't stop! Fuck that's good!" my voice rang through the car as I grasped his shoulders tightly while I rocked against his hand causing an exquisite new sensation to enflame my body as his fingers pumped me and his palm rubbed against my clit.

"I want… no, I fucking need to taste you Bella!" Edward pushed me back against the car door and lifted one of my legs over his shoulder as I released my grip on him only to grip the sides of the seat even tighter. He looked up at me for permission and I nodded vigorously in acceptance.

My eyes rolled back into my head as he lowered himself down on me. His hot breath fanned over my pussy and I fought the urge to grab his hair and shove him into me. My body shook with anticipation and I felt myself jerk as his tongue reached out to caress me.

"Holy shit!" I screamed out. My body convulsed against him and I squeezed the seat beneath me harder. His tongue came against me and his fingers pumped me slowly causing a myriad of sensations to rocket through me. I didn't know what to focus on as he flicked his tongue against my clit before gently sucking me into his mouth causing a scream to erupt from my chest.

"GAAHHHH!" My hands flew from the chair to his head as I gripped his hair and arched myself into him. I was panting heavily and felt the coiling in my stomach. I had no control over my body as he moved his tongue more vigorously against me alternating his finger pumping with his tongue gliding inside of me. My body rocked against his face searching for release from the painful pressure my impending orgasm was causing. Without warning, Edward quickly plunged his fingers into me while he simultaneously sucked on my clit.

"EDWARD! FFFUUUCCCKKK!" I cried out into the car as I tightened my hold on his hair. My vision went black as tiny white flashes danced before my eyes and my legs pulled up trapping him between my knees.

"Mmmm… that was so sexy baby," Edward mumbled against my thigh and I whimpered desperately. My body was incredibly sensitive to his touch in that moment.

"I'm sorry. I kind of lost control there," I panted with embarrassment at my reactions. I could feel my face flaming as Edward kissed my neck. I pulled him up to kiss my lips and licked at him feeling a strange sense of satisfaction at tasting myself on his lips.

"Fuck, your loss of control was the sexiest part. I loved seeing you so free," he sighed as he rested his forehead against mine. I smiled at him as I rubbed my leg against his arousal and he groaned.

"What are you waiting for?" I whispered huskily into his ear as he let out a groan and rocked against my thigh.

"I don't have a condom. I didn't think this would be on the agenda tonight…" he continued to rock against me as he spoke and I looked into his eyes. I was desperate to feel him but I didn't carry condoms with me either.

"You always use one, right? I mean… yeah…" I mumbled awkwardly. He nodded as I watched his Adam's apple bob with his nervous swallow.

"Just this once, okay? I can get the morning after pill. I… umm… I'll start birth control soon," I gulped and gasped as he quickly pulled his pants down to reveal his impressive cock begging for release.

"Are you sure?" he whispered as he lined himself up and rubbed his head against me. I could only nod as he slowly entered me. I gasped and lifted my hips to meet him. It felt incredible having him fill me again.

Edward eased his way into me and pumped slowly. The heat of his bare skin was invigorating. I gasped and moaned with each movement he made. Our bodies fit together so well. His hands caressed my thighs before he lifted one of my legs allowing my knee to rest on his shoulder.

"Ohmygodholyshitfuckdamn," Edward muttered incoherently as he sank into me deeper. I whimpered at the pleasure the new angle gave me.

"Faster… please. I can't… just… faster!" I squeezed his upper arms as they flexed with each pump into me. My back arched slightly giving him the perfect angle.

His speed increased and I could feel his strain to hold off his orgasm until I came. I needed to feel his release so I slipped my hand between us and rubbed my clit. Edward growled at my movement and pumped harder into me keeping his eyes on where we were connected. I bit my lip as I felt my orgasm approaching and slipped my fingers further to where our bodies connected rubbing against him each time he withdrew from me.

"Oh god! Shit, yessssssssssssss Bella!" Edward's cry ripped through the car and my back arched with the force of my release against him. Edward stilled his movements and laid his forehead against my stomach as he caught his breath.

"I fucking love you, do you know that? God that was amazing," Edward panted and kissed my exposed stomach before pulling out of me. I whimpered at the loss of his closeness.

"I love you too. And that wasn't amazing, that was fucking incredible. There are no words to describe that," I whispered in response.

"You're perfect," he pressed his lips against mine as we relaxed against his backseat to calm ourselves and continue our night together.


End file.
